To Live is the Rarest Thing

Chapter 12

They finished dinner without any unpleasant talk about Death or reanimated dead bodies. It wasn’t until they were just about done with their raspberry vanilla parfaits for dessert that Remus asked after their most recent adventure.

“So am I to understand that you summoned Death?” Remus asked while he put down his spoon on his empty plate.

Harry ate his two last bites of his excellent dessert, another one of Tom’s specialities, before he answered. “Yeah, we came across a simple ritual to summon Death in one of the books from Grimmauld Place, so thanks for that, Sirius.” Harry gave his godfather a mock-glare, which Sirius answered with a confused frown while he finished his own dessert. “Anyway, we summoned Death to get some answers, turns out Death is an Eldritch horror who, if we’re not mistaken, has created the entire multiverse and all life within it by themselves as a sort of experimental ant-farm because they needed a hobby or something.”

Both Remus and Sirius gaped at Harry, eyes wide and disbelieving. “You’re having us on,” Remus finally managed to say.

“Nope.” Harry leaned back in his seat, wiping his mouth with the napkin he kept across his lap. “It was the freakiest, scariest thing I’ve ever seen and I literally shit myself, so that is saying something.” Harry carelessly gestured towards Tom. “Even Tom peed his pants, just to further illustrate the point.”

“Yes, thank you, dear,” Tom said with an eyeroll. “That’s just what I want the whole world to know.”

Harry snickered and gave Tom his sweetest smile for a brief moment before turning back to his dogfathers. “Anyway, it turns out there is a reason for our endless reincarnations. To get in touch with humans so they won’t decide to willy nilly exterminate us all, Death needs human anchors to live as many different human lives as possible. And the Hallows picked us for reasons.”

“Because we are compatible, but we still had a trial period, if you will. Because we wanted to keep living even after all this time, we now have the job permanently until we decide to quit.” Tom waited patiently for Sirius or Remus to react, but they both seemed at an absolute loss as to what to say to that kind of news.

“Well,” Remus finally managed. “I’m at least happy for you that there is a way out should you desire it.”

“Yeah,” Harry quickly agreed. “That was a relief to hear. Until that time, whenever it may be, we can pretty much do what we like with our lives, as long as we live them.”

“Huh.” Sirius still seemed at a loss of what to say exactly, his gaze darting between Harry and Tom. “So it won’t mind you doing necromancy tomorrow when you bring Reggie back?”

“They didn’t mention any limitations of any kind, literally said they didn’t care about good or evil as we see it,” Harry explained with a shrug. “So we should be good.”

“We could use your help, though,” Tom said while giving the dogfathers a considering look. “There are hundreds of inferi that need to be dispatched as quickly as possible.”

“How?” Remus asked, sitting up a bit in his chair.

“Fire. I can control them enough to summon them one by one, but then we need to burn each of them individually. With four wands this will go far quicker than with two.” Tom looked down for a second, slowly folding his hands on the table, fingers interlaced. “I understand if you would find it too distasteful. They are the reanimated bodies of muggles and wizards and witches, all enemies of Voldemort at some point.”