Perfect Twins

Chapter 12.

Of course Alice Abott had to come back home. She had no real friends and no relatives who lived close by that she could seek help from, that's probably part of the reason why she was going insane. She once believed that Jamie was the love of her life, but all her dreams crushed and reality punched her in the face. Poor poor Alice...

Janet hated when Alice came back home in the middle of the night with her breath and body odor smelling overwhelmingly with alcohol. But they never protested against Alice's wishes, she was sad; they hoped it would wear off. Soon, things got worse instead of better. Alice had a new addiction other than alcohol and tobacco, and it was sex. At first, the twins wouldn't see their mother until later next morning. They didn't dare to ask where she'd been, even if they did, one of two things would happen; either Alice would pretend like they didn't exist or she would beat them, claimed they've done something wrong and slit their wrists... a habit Alice picked up along the way. There was once a night when Alice brought a guy to the house. They crashed the front door open in the middle of the night, making the twins jump in surprise. They heard quick unsettling footsteps from downstairs that had no rhythm, suggesting that there was probably another person with Alice. Janet and Lucy came down the stairs quietly but stopped halfway when they had a good enough view. It was all clear although most of the lights were off. Alice and a man they didn't know squished their bodies against each other, throwing each other across the room, panting and moaning. They started to undress each other impatiently, and the twins felt uncomfortable and embarrassed. Fear was the only thing that held the twins back from stopping this heated moment. Janet tapped on Lucy's shoulder and they went back up the stairs. But it didn't help when they locked themselves in their room, every creek of their footsteps and sound of the breath they lead out was still heard clear from upstairs thanks to their rundown house, and thin walls. But nevertheless, they had to bear with it. 

***

"Mom?" Janet approached Alice who sat on the couch in the living room. Alice looked calm for once. She held her cigarette in between her fingers and she spread the toxic smell with her exhaling around the room, not being considerate that she had eleven-year-old twins that could get harmed. She slouched in the coach, and looked down at the album of old photos. Her eyes were suspiciously damp and red, they were dull but they were looking beyond the photos into a far distant past. Looking at Alice hurt Janet and she just wanted to cry.

"Hm?" Alice responded without looking up.

"You need to eat mom." Janet said with a low voice, trying not to make her mother angry.

"Mhm..."

"Mom please! You're getting thinner and thinner. You need to-" Janet swallowed the rest of her words to hold back the tears that were going to appear.

Alice ignored Janet and continued looking at the photos taken back when their family was complete and happy; back when Alice thought nothing could come in between her and her happiness, back when Jamie loved his family and back when the twins were never bullied. But now... now Janet had to force herself to learn how to cook, clean, do laundry and protect her sister because her mother was too sad to handle any of her responsibilities. It drove Janet mad. How could Alice just sit there and do nothing about the abuse she's giving to her children at home or the abuse her children are getting at school? Was it abuse? Did they deserve it? Alice used to nag about how she was never appreciated enough by the twins or the person who was responsible for giving her love, her husband Jamie that suddenly disappeared.

"We need to be punished." Janet asserted. She sat down on the floor in the bathroom. Lucy had made sure the door was locked. They sat close, in front of each other; in between them was a blade from a sharpener.

"Why do we need to be punished?" Lucy asked, tears gathering in her eyes.

"We are partly responsible for mom's current situation. No matter what, we need to keep reminding ourselves that we need to love mom no matter what she does."

"Even if she brings a stranger home?" Asked Lucy. "Or even if she hurts us with a knife or with her body? Even if she calls us names and abandon us in this house? Even if she doesn't care for us getting bullied in school? Even if she drinks and smokes so much?"

"No matter what, Lucy. She's our mother, hate is the last thing this family needs."

"But all this family has is hate."

Janet glared at Lucy, "you don't hate me, do you?"

"I will never."

"Mom is just sad Lucy, we just need to cheer her up, and that's why we're being punished, because we were never there with her from the start." Janet picked up the blade and looked at it, and then glanced at their forearms. Both of their forearms were filled with scars done by their mother Alice.

"We don't have any space." Lucy said.

"We'll do it on our thighs. You do mine, and I'll do yours. Give each other the pain that we deserve, the deeper the blade, the more the pain."

"But Jan, you're not guilty of anything, it's just me."

Janet looked up at her physical reflection, Lucy, but Lucy was weaker than her, and that's what Janet adored about Lucy. Lucy was honest and adorable at times. Janet's eyes turned red, she smiled sadly, leaned forward and pecked Lucy softly on the lips with closed eyes and then went back. Her sister was the most precious thing in the world to her.

"We're equally guilty, Lucy." She finally said softly, "remember our oath?"

Lucy nodded, "all we have is each other, and that is all we need."

Janet smiled proudly, "please don't tell anyone else about this Lucy. Don't talk to anyone, if they get involved, they'll cause trouble."

"What about Jason?"

"Absolutely not."

Lucy nodded, "I'm ready."