It was her | h.s

37

Raelynn Smith

As I step inside the shopping centre me and Harry are both immediately greeted with a blast of air conditioning, making my goosebumps more prominent. He hugs me close to his chest so I warm up a little bit.

"Anywhere in particular you wanna look first Ray." He asks while looking around the store.

"Uhm I'm not sure. You chose."

"Ray I'm not the one wearing them" he says while chuckling.

"Oh yeah." I say while shaking my head out of embarrassment. What a dumb thing to say

"Okay maybe like the tops? I don't want to get too much because I'm not having you waste your money on me."

"We aren't leaving the city until you have at least 10 items of clothing"

"Harry no that's too much-"

"Nope. At least 10. They can all be from here or different shops I don't mind."

I couldn't help but chuckle and get a bit flustered. That was really sweet, and also very demanding.

"Thank you." I say as I nusle my nose in closer for protection. Protection of what I wasn't so sure he just made me feel safe. Quite ironic isn't it?

As we get into the clothing section I brush my finger tips along all the hangers containing tops in my size. I normally stick to baggy and oversized as I didn't like the way I look.

I pick out a black oversized top that's filled with millions of words.

"Nope." Harry says as he takes it out of my hand to place it back on the clothing rack.

"What? It's cool like all the writing and stuff."

"Ray. I know you're insecure but please. Don't be." He says as he grabs my forearms

"How do you know I'm insecure." I say trying to sound confident

"Ray. Please. I constantly see you wearing the same baggy clothes 24/7, whenever someone says something nice about your appearance you'll go all shy and face the ground, when you smile it will fade quickly because you hate the creases by your eyes, you'll always hold your stomach if you're not wearing a jumper, you'll constantly bite your nails around other people. But I want you to know. No one cares. And if they do care then they care for the right reasons."

The things he just listed left me astounded. I didn't know what to say. He probably felt like he was talking to a brick wall from how silent I was being but it's the fact that he picks out those little things and reassures me that they're nothing to worry about.

"Okay. Fine. I'll try on something different." I say as I start to go find something else.

He grabs my wrist gently before we walk off

"I don't want you to feel like I'm forcing you to do this. If you really want the black shirt I'll get it for you. I just wanted you to know that you're amazing and that you don't need to hide yourself."

"Thank you Harry. And To be honest, it will be fun being out my comfort zone."

"Okay then. Up to you." He says as we both start walking deeper into the clothing section when a black tank top really sticks out at me. It's straps on the shoulders, cropped and it's tight. Not to far beside it were some black high wasted jeans with about 3 buttons on them. They looked like a fucking serve and a half. Well. For me anyway.

"Can we go over here?"

"You don't need to ask babe. I'll just follow."

I didn't stop in my tracks but it didn't stop me from recognising that he called me babe for the first time and actually meaning it. I wouldn't say it back because I wouldn't mean it, as horrible as that sounds I know.

I go on my tip toes to reach the top rack to grab the top and not to far along, the jeans that would look like they'd match. I do love to live in black, anything goes with it.

"That looks nice." Harry says while smiling as I grab it down.

"I'll try them on first."

"Okay Ray. Up to you. I'll wait outside and you can come show me."

"Okay but like...don't get to excited" I say as we make our way through what feels like endless isles of clothes to get to the changing room.

"You'll look stunning." He says while plastering probably the prettiest smile I've ever seen on him.

I blushed as I walked into the dimmed, curtained room. I close it behind me and look at myself in the mirror.

"You got this." I whisper to myself so no one else can hear.

As I remove every item of clothing I feel myself get more and more insecure. I couldn't look at myself in the mirror in my underwear, I'd probably break down crying.

I put on the jeans and do the 3 buttons and the zip up. I then put the top on which actually felt like a comfy fit. I roll the hems of the jeans up ones so they don't hang over my ankles.

I exhale a deep breath before walking out. I thought I'd show Harry before I looked at myself.

I counted in my head

1...
2...
3...

I push the curtains open slowly to see him sat down on a couch outside. As soon as he sees me his eyes widen and his lips part as he looks me up and down.

He steps closer and looks like he's seen a ghost.

I put my head in my hands

"I know... I know I should've stuck to baggy clothes so you didn't see me like this." I say as I go to rush into the changing rooms with my head down so I didn't see myself.

I was held back by a firm grip on my wrist.

"Raelynn Smith. What the fuck are you insecure about."

"Just everything okay Harry. I look gross I know which is why I sti-"

"Ray. Have you even looked at yourself."

"Well no... not yet and now I don't plan on doing so"

"Close your eyes." He says while smiling

"W-what." I say with my eyes filled with tears from embarrassment.

"Don't cry baby. Just close your eyes."

I let out a deep breathe and do as he says. I feel him turn me around and lead me back into what I assume is the dressing room. I keep my hands out in front of me as a natural reaction in fear I might bump into something.

That was when I heard a curtain close behind me and Harry's hands rub the sides of my arms.

"Open your eyes." He whispers in my ear causing all the hairs on my body to stand up as his hot breath crashes against my ear

It takes me a good few seconds before actually slowly lifting my eyelids up to reveal that I was stood in front of a mirror.

When I looked into it, I didn't see the girl I thought I looked like. I saw someone who looked good and confident in what they were wearing. Someone's who's hair sat perfectly on their good set of shoulders, sure their waist wasn't the tiniest bit let's be real... Tiny waists aren't. I saw someone with so much hope and light in their eyes. And then behind them I saw a man resting his chin on the girls shoulder with his arms wrapped around her waist smiling as both his dimples popped.

That girl was me. And at first I struggled to believe it, but Harry helped me.

"Can I get this?" I ask with a new set of tears in my eyes, Except this time from happiness.

"Ray. It would be illegal not to get it. You look amazing. See? There's nothing to be insecure about." He says as he kisses my forehead, which was another thing I was insecure about but him kissing it made me realise maybe it isn't so bad.

// okay a couple things.

1) thank you so much for 1k like you have no idea how much that means to me🥺 like as soon as I saw it I almost cried. I didn't even expect nearly half of it.

2) whoever reads this I want you to know that you're beautiful and I love you <3