Grease and Switchblades~ Book 1

The Way it Is

     I froze, I couldn't feel my heartbeat, I couldn't feel myself standing, but the one thing I did feel was the warmth of the tears streaming down my face. My brother was dead, it felt so weird to think. I had not realized that Pony already said goodbye to the cops, and that they were gone. I hadn't thought about anything other than our fight. Not the fact that my own brother is gone, or that the only person that ever really loved me, besides Ponyboy, was gone. "How?" I tried to say this, but it never came out of my mouth. I lied there, on the floor, in a ball, with Ponyboy holding me tight.
     I have never felt this pain before, and nothing could describe it. Since I was not listening to the conversation between Pony and the cops, I still have no idea how Steve was killed. Did someone shoot him? Was he in a car accident? I finally managed to get words out, "How?" I looked behind me where Ponyboy was, holding me tightly. "He was in a car accident." This just made me cry more, "No, no, no." I sobbed. "It's ok. It's ok." Pony repeated. "I know." He said. I sat up with Ponyboy holding me. "Let's go, Elizabeth. Let's go." Pony said while lifting me up.
     We walked to his room and he helped me lay down on the bed. I shoved my face into the pillow. Pony sat down next to me and wrapped his arms around me. "I've got you, you're alright." He said. "Why?" I whispered, "Why did he have to die?" We sat in silence for a couple of seconds. "I don't know." Pony replied. "When do I have to plan the funeral?" I asked. "Probably tomorrow." He replied. I silently cried. I fell asleep, still crying. I woke up the next morning and got out of bed. Ponyboy was still asleep, so I tried not to wake him. I walked to the bathroom and looked at my face. My blonde hair that used to be straight and untangled, was now in knots. My skin was red, under my eyes were puffy, and I looked tired.
     I decided I was going to put on makeup, so Darry wouldn't ask if I have been crying all night. Even though it's normal to cry after a death, I didn't want to show the gang. When I was done I walked out. Darry had made pancakes, so I sat down at the table. I showed no expression, I just sat there staring at my food. "You alright, Elizabeth?" Darry asked. "I don't know." I said quietly. "Will you help me plan the, um, the funeral?" I asked. "Of course I can." He replied. "Thank you." I picked up my fork, but I couldn't eat.
     Ponyboy came up behind me and grabbed my shoulders. He leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Good morning, beautiful. How are ya doing?" I was still staring at my food with the fork in my hand. "Fine." I said. Ponyboy sat down right next to me. I whispered to him, "Is this going to feel better?" He looked at me, "Yeah, it gets better." I finally ate my food. When I finished I stood up and went to the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror again. The puffiness was still under my eyes. I heard a small knock on the door, "Can I come in?" I heard Darry ask. "Yeah, come on in, Dar." My voice sounded gravelly. "I know its rough. I completely understand." I looked away from him, so he couldn't see my tears and the redness under my eyes. "You can cry." He grabbed my arm and pulled me into a hug. He was taller than me, so my face was buried in his chest.
     I was crying a lot louder than I have been. "It's ok. you're going to be ok." he said. His shirt was wet from all of the tears."I'm sorry. just give me a minute." I said pulling away. "Sure." He walked out of the bathroom. I remembered I had to plan the funeral, it was hard enough for it to be the day after my brother's death, now I have to plan the whole funeral. I walked out of the bathroom and sat back down next to Pony at the table. "Hey." Pony said. "Is Soda up yet?" I asked. "Yeah, but he already went to the DX." Darry answered. "Ok, um, I'll be back in about forty-five minutes." I walked out of the room, then out of the front door.
     I took my time walking to the DX, but the only problem was that it was really cold, and I don't have a jacket. I tried to walk faster so I could get into the warmth of the gas station. It might sound weird, but the DX is my favorite place to be. I like hanging out with Soda, he can be really funny. I finally got to the DX and walked inside. I saw no Soda, so I went to the garage. I opened the door leading into the room and Soda was there. "Oh, hey!" I smiled, "Hey, yourself." I looked at him a little confused.
     "What are you doing out here and not at the counter?" I asked. "I just got a little sad about Steve and everything." He was still looking at the cars. "Yeah, I get it." I walked closer to his side and hugged him. "Its going to be ok, right?" I asked. "Yeah, we're going to be fine." he answered. "I have to get back to Darry, he's helping me plan the funeral." He nodded. I walked away and out of the gas station. Soda ran up behind me, "I realized you don't have a coat, so I'm giving you my extra." He smiled. "Thanks, Soda." I walked away to the Curtis house.
     "Hey, you ready to plan?" I asked Darry. "Yeah." Darry sat down and started talking about who is coming, where we could have it, and how much it will cost. I just sat there. "I'm going to get some night shifts at the DX so I can pay you back for this." I said. "No, I can't let you do that." He answered. "Well, too bad." I smiled a little bit, it was the first time in a while. "Where did Pony go?" I asked. "He went to see Dallas." I nodded. "Oh, I really appreciate you helping me with this." He smiled, "It's no problem." He told me that we had to take a drive somewhere, so I got in the truck and he drove. "Where do we have to go, Dar?" I waited for a response. "You'll see." Is all he said.
     We got there, parked the car, and got out. "What's this?" I asked. "This is where our parents died." He looked straight at the train tracks. "Do you come here often?" I asked. "Yeah. I come here sometimes. If the gang is being too loud or something." It was so different to see Darry like this. "Thank you for bringing me here." Darry wrapped his arm around me. "You know, I really like you and Pony together. You keep him out of trouble." I smiled. "I like having you guys, it's nice to have people that love you." I said. "Well, we do. You're our kid sister." He chuckled a little bit. We sat there for another couple of minutes.
     "Ok, I need to tell Pony something. Can we get out of here?" Darry nodded and we walked back to the truck. We got in and drove away. I stared out of the window, "Thank you so much. You've done so much for me in these past couples of months. Thank you." Darry just kept driving. I knew it was hard for him to talk about money and all of the problems, but I really needed to thank him. I bit my lip and fumbled with my fingers. I was nervous for many reasons. One reason is that I don't know where I am going to live. I couldn't keep doing this to Ponyboy and his brothers. "The extra money I get from working at the DX I am going to use to get a house, an apartment, or something." Darry looked a little taken back, "Why would you do that?" He asked. "Well, I can't let you have to sleep with your brother anymore. Also, you have to pay for my food and water." Darry rolled his eyes, "Listen, kid sister, you're staying with us." I smiled. "Thanks."
     The thought of Steve popped into my head. I started to cry, it was just too soon to think about our memories. We got back to the house and walked inside. "Where were you two?" Pony asked. "We just stepped out for a couple of minutes." I said. "Wanna catch a smoke with me in the back?" I asked Pony. "Yeah, sure." We walked to the back door and sat down outside. I grabbed a cigarette and lit it, Pony did the same. "We should go out on a date." Pony said. "We have, remember? We went to the dingo for a coke." I took a puff on the cigarette and blew out. "No, I want to take you somewhere nice." Pony said. "Hun, you know you don't have money for that." Pony looked down at his feet embarrassed. "I'm getting a job." I said. "Oh yeah? where?" He asked. "The DX." He seemed surprised. We sat there for another hour, we watched the sky and we talked. I was having so many mixed feelings. I had feelings of sadness because of my brother, but I was always happy because of Ponyboy. We made each other happier.