Princess (Dean Ambrose)

Chapter 18

"Aj, come over!" I yelled into the phone.
"Calm down El. I will." She said.
I paced back and forth until she arrived in my room.
"What's wrong Ella?" She asked.
"AJ I'm a horrible person," I told her.
"No you're not Ella." She said.
"I am, Aj. First Dean and I kissed and it was great. But then the whole Summer thing happened. Then Dolph and I kissed yesterday. And I'm not sure if I liked it or not because I really like Dean, but I feel like Dolph is better for me. He told me he's had feelings for me for a while. I don't want to lead him on, but I need to get over Dean. What do I do?" I asked her. I'm not great with guys by any means. I haven't had any type of relationship since high school. I didn't date much. I've honestly just been so focused on wrestling. This is truly the most action I've had in a long time.
"Wow, you're in quite the predicament." She said, resulting in me shooting her a dirty look.
"I think you should follow your heart. Don't go with Dolph just because you think he's better for you. And don't go for Dean just because he may bring excitement to the table. Remember what he did to you. No, I'm not saying Dean's incapable of being in love. And no, I'm not saying that you can't develop romantic feelings for Dolph overtime. But you don't need to pick and choose. Clearly, they're both ok with waiting, so why do you feel so rushed? Let them both know how you feel. And be honest." AJ told me.
"You're right AJ. I'm going to tell them both right now. I'll text Dolph and go see Dean." I said.
"Great." She said.
"I'll see you later?" I asked.
"Yeah." She assured me, giving me a supportive squeeze on the shoulder.
I texted Dolph exactly how I felt.
I told him how I'm unsure of my feelings and I don't want to lead him on.
Next, I left to go to Dean's room.
I knocked on the door and Seth opened up.
"Hi." I told him quietly. He just gave me a small smile and let me in.
"Dean someone's here to see you." Seth said.
"Tell them to go away," he groaned. 

"Someone's got a killer hangover," Seth whispered, trying not to laugh, which caused me to smile a bit.
"Even me?" I asked him. He looked up and shot me a sympathetic smile.
"Ella I'm sorry." he started.
"Shut up Dean. I'm fine. But I came here because we need to talk." I said.
"Yeah." He trailed off.
"I want you to tell me exactly how you feel about me. Just be honest. I need to know where we stand. If this is the last time we can have an actual conversation, then I need closure." I told him.
"Ella. When I'm with you, I feel things that I haven't felt before," he took a deep breath, "I hate the thought of seeing you with another man. And that's one of the reasons why I want to rip Ziggler to shreds. When Summer kissed me, I kissed back. I did. I'm not going to lie. It's who I am. But I realized how dull it felt compared to kissing you. My involvement with Summer was a huge mistake. Look Ella, I'm not one with words. I'm not your classic romantic guy. I fuck girls. Usually, I wouldn't have a problem with it. But now, it just doesn't feel right. I'm gaining these feelings for you fast. I like you more and more each day and I don't know what to do about it."
"Wow," I started, "I was not expecting that. Dean, I have feelings for you too. But I do think we need time. Dolph and I kissed yesterday. And I kissed him back, even though after doing so, I don't think I have feelings for him. I don't know what it is about you, but I like you. I like you a lot." 

He had a hopeful look on his face before I said, "But as much as I like you, I need to protect my hear first. I don't know if I can see myself in a long term relationship with you, and at the moment, I don't want anything casual."

"I don't want anything casual either" he protested, "at least not with you."

"Actions speak louder than words Dean. I think we need time away from each other, at least in terms of dating."

"Ella." He started but I cut him off.
"Let's just be friends," I told him, "just give me time to think everything out."
He shook his head.
"I can respect that," he said, "but just know that I want more than friendship with you, and every time that I look at you, I'll be reminded of what I don't have. " 
"Goodbye Dean." I told him, not quite knowing what to respond 
He pulled me into a big hug.
"I'm not giving up on you Ella."

He knew exactly what to say.