Trembling Hands (One Direction Fan Fiction)

Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty

~Harry’s POV~

Her dairy would haunt me forever… When I realized what it was, I snapped pictures of it in my phone so I could read it again, so I would have proof if she tried to cover it up or hide the diary… everyone would be so worried… but she didn’t want them to know….What scared me the most was the lack of a date, this could have been last night for all we know… I re-read it over again…

Dear Diary,

This is it. I can’t take it any longer. I made my decision: tonight, it will all be over. The pen is in one hand, and my only friend, my blade, is in my other hand; I can’t turn back now. I want to escape my dad, to see my mom, to be accepted and loved… I want to end it. No one cares anyway, I don’t have anything going for me, so what’s the point? I guess this is goodbye…

-Brielle, not that anyone cares.

I shuddered; there was no date, but it was the last entry… I wondered when this happened… if she actually did try to commit suicide or if she just wrote about it… It scared me and hurt me and overwhelmed me. In the back there was two pieces of paper torn out with other notes on them; I took pictures of those too, they also haunted me…

Dad,

By the time you read this, I should be gone, hopefully to be with mom. Even though you’ve hurt my countless times, I forgive you and I know mom does too. Now the question is, will you forgive me and will you forgive yourself? I love you.

-Brielle

The note had been slightly crumped; it looked like she was going to throw it away, but she clearly uncrumpled it and shoved it in the back of the book for some reason. The next note shattered my heart even more; I didn’t think it was even possible…

To No One,

What was I thinking? Who would want to hear what I had to say? That’s right: no one. So I’m writing this mainly for myself, but also as the ending of my story; it can’t be left on a cliffhanger forever, can it? I had a good life, but then I lost everything with two little words: “she’s dead”. It was obviously my own fault; everyone hates me, even my own father. I just don’t see a point in trying anymore. If by some miracle, someone is reading this in the future, then I would like them to know that this isn’t a loss; it’s a gain. My father is better off without me, and the world is better off without me, I’m just taking up space. Don’t worry, I won’t be afraid or upset: I’m going to die listening to my favorite song, Moments. I’m going to remember the good times with my mom. I’m going to be happy. Goodbye.

-Brielle Ann Korey

I wish I could go back to when she wrote this, go back and tell her how special and wonderful and perfect she is. Obviously she’s still alive, but knowing how much pain she’s been living with hurts more than words could describe. No one deserves to feel that horrible about themselves, especially someone was unique, beautiful, flawless, loving, and perfect as Brielle. She wanted to die listening to my voice, we didn’t even know each other, but our song was that special to her… It took me back to the concert where I had first saw her… crying over Moments… I knew that the song touched her, but I had no idea it meant that much to her until today… I know why she cries over it now…

A notification on my phone interrupted my thoughts. I probably would have ignored it if it wasn’t from Brielle… :

Briellerz – Harry… we need to talk. I’m still angry that you went through my stuff, but I’m really sorry you saw my diary… how much did you see…?