she's got a bad reputation - rini au

chapter 29: too much to break your heart

Nini was trying to find her makeup wipes, wanting more than anything to go to sleep and wake up in 18 hours. She couldn't find them anywhere, then she remembered that Kourtney had used the last one the last time she had came to her house. She left a loud growl and started to find some face cream she could use. She might be too sad to change her outfit but the makeup was way too uncomfortable, the liner was sticky on her cheeks and the glitter was spreading to her neck. She heard something on her window, thinking it was just the wind, she just continued to look for that freaking cream. Then something knocked her window again, then again. On the fourth time, she turned around to see what the sound was. She grabbed scissor that she had on her nightstand, for some reason, and approached the window. She was about to open it when she saw him. He was on the little roof she had under her window, throwing rocks to catch her attention. He didn't see her yet, so she dropped the scissor on top of clothes on the floor she had tried before the party. She opened the window and all her sadness and
anger came back.

"You have 30 seconds to leave or I'll call the police." She screamed. He looked at her and left a breath he did not know he was holding. He started to climb closer to her. She didn't flinch to close the window on his face.

"C'mon Neens. It's not that it looked like!" He started to knock on her window, watching her grabbing some clothes and leaving them in the closet. He saw all the tissues beside her bed, he saw how her makeup was all over her face. Tear stains. He felt his heart break a little more. He caused that. He did that to her. He hurt her. All because of something that wasn't real. He continued to knock on her door for 5 more minutes, until he saw her drop some book on her bed, he saw how the book bounced and ended up on the floor, again. Her mind was telling her to leave the room and go sleep somewhere else, but she knew that she wouldn't be able to sleep without talking to him, knowing that he was there. Without moking eye contact, she opened the window, letting him enter her room. She continued to look for that fucking face cream that was getting her more frustrated. He stood there, not really knowing how to act or say what he had been practising for the last hour with her ignoring his presence.

"Nini... Can you please look at me? Neens, c'mon..." He softly said, not wanting her to get more upset. She exhaled, and turned around to look at him, for the first time since he had arrived.

"You don't get to do this, you know? Who do you think you are? I get that Gina hates me, but making up a fucking plan to break my heart it's mean, and vile, and fucked up. For seven months I trusted you, what does that make me? A fool. A clown. I wouldn't be this hurt if you didn't ask me out. I would be hurt, yes, but without a reason. But no. You had to take me out to this perfect date yesterday, dance with me, tease me, all for what? To make out with the same girl you told me not to worry about, that you didn't even like her as a friend. That you never believed what she had said about me. I told you what she made me feel, she made me feel I couldn't have a happy memory of these years. Until you came, you and all of your friends. For the first time in forever, today I had fun. I wasn't worrying about all the other people, or if I looked ugly. I didn't care about anything. So you don't get to do this. You don't get to break me and then come to my house. I want you out. Out of here, out of my life. I can't keep hurting myself by being around you. And I even lost my friends now. So leave. Leave!" She said, without looking at him, with tears on her face. When she saw that his legs weren't moving, she started to push him back at the window. She didn't notice the tears streaming down his face. Or that he had the same expression that she had. He couldn't even move when she started to scream at him, or when she started to push him. He just let her.

Until all his senses came back. He turned around and looked at her, really looked at her. She continued to push him away, while sobbing with the word leave on her lips. She couldn't move him anymore, she was fragile, crying and she was really small. She just punched him on the chest, and hugged herself, without being able to control the sobbing and the loud noises coming out of her. She was about to fall into the floor, but he caught her first, hugging her tightly into his chest, sitting down with her in his arms. She couldn't fight anymore, her head was hurting as hell and she needed a hug, even if he was the one giving it to her. They stayed there, him holding her while she cried. He couldn't talk, because he was trying too hard not to break down like her. Until they both stopped crying. He was laying his back on the wall, with her on his chest. She was the one who broke the silence.