Risk it All [GxG]

8| Better

I was about to take the next shot, I factly stop counting after the 6th tequila but I like the idea of loosing myself to alcohol, "oh come on!" I groaned when someone snatched it from me and looking at it, she's Andrea, "Hi boss" why is my voice is such in high pitch?

"You're drunk Isabella" she lowly stated the most obvious before placing the shot glass back to the table and signaling the bartender something.

And now just realized that I really did called her to come over? I thought it was my imagination? "I...didn't know that you're really coming...." I shyly admit....guess alcohol can really make you do stupid things, like calling your boss in the middle of the night.

She sat in front of me with that lazy stare "what happened again?"

Her question is making me remember of why I was here from the first place....and can't help to smile a bit from a mouthful heartache.

"Bella, let's get you home okay?"

Just those words and it makes me tear up while smirking at the pain that I need to look up so it look won't fall.

"Isabella, drinking every time will not get you anywhere"

I shrugged now meeting hers with a faint tears that I'm really trying to hold, "but it makes me somehow feel better....."

She closed her eyes for a moment before darting back in annoyed stare "I really don't get people doing stupid things over the word, love, it is just a feeling, a thing inside your head"

I subtly nodded looking down, bitting my lower lip but can't help whether to smirk at it or let the tears fall for billion times "I was exactly like you 2 years ago...." I say, looking up to her then wipe off this stupid tears, "Never believe in love, promise myself to never ever beg for someone, that if she leaves then fuck it because I know my worth....that I valued myself, I respect myself, that I will never bawled my eyes out like how my friends does whenever they had their heartbroken because they always, always look so pathetic....I used to say, it's just love, that you can find someone better and that person is not worth your tears"

She lightly nodded before tilting her body towards with boredom expression, "then what happened to that girl?"

I stared deeply into her and letting a solemn moment filled the gap before forming a saddened smile, ".....she fell in love too, then realized that words are easy to say but hard to do"

I watch how her stoic expression turned softly but she immediately maneuvered it back after heaving a sighed while lightly shaking her head before a faint smirk.

".....they were together..." fuck it hurts to say it loud than letting it sit in the corner of my mind, "all throughout Seattle, they spend the night in one room while I was overthinking, dying of thinking with so many what ifs, that I almost opted to stupidly book a flight just to check on her if she's okay, or if she skipped meals or overworked....I could still remember how my heart raced every seconds while waiting, staring to the screen, how every time my phone lit up my heart accelerates, how the overwhelming nervousness faltered my breathing, how I was panicking, fucking worried over nothing....and had this million scenarios inside my head of the things they probably did and it is fucking driving me fucking mad. I'm fucking so mad, so fucking mad...."

I took a deep sighed before reaching the shot that she didn't mind to stop me and watching me draining all of its substance as the bitter liquid flows inside my throat yet it feels so fitting.

"Just leave her Isabella"

"Easy to say right? But believe me it is so fucking hard to do because after all this time, she's still what I want at the end of the day. That I still believe in us, that this just a phase to every relationship, we can survive this, she's just....maybe she's just lost?...and she will find her way back to me" that's how much I love Erin.

****

I woke up with a pain in the ass hangover, matching my massive headache and the feeling of throwing up with an empty stomach but remembered that I have to work.

Drea nudge me a cold bottled water whilst she drives in one hand, wearing a black tinted expensive sunglasses, looking so unbothered, "how are you still okay?" I asked after getting the water.

"I'm not the one who emptied almost two bottle of Cuervo" that's a fact but still, I couldn't barely remember that I did that "dance like a crazy woman in the street while singing happier than ever on top of her lungs at the convenience store"

I just smiled to all of it while wishing myself to be swallow by earth. "I can treat you lunch?"

She smirked at it and I guess that's a yes.

After parking the car, we headed inside the store but not ready to see Erin and Daphne. I don't know what to do but the moment my eyes laid to them, the pinching sensation begins with thoughts of what they do the whole night?

Is it just really work?

Or.

"Isabella" Drea calls out my name, making me snap back that I'm still stuck standing while watching them "get yourself together. You're not just someone here but the head operation" she firmly stated in strict gaze "forget the weak Isabella, I don't need her here at work. Bella, everyone here looks up in you, respect you, you have the authority, the power and if you're showing up like someone's incompetent and slacking? Then get out, take the day but make sure that when you return, you're at your best self"

This is the first time to see Andrea being strict like this, that it is making me nervous as my eyes were locked on her sharp glare.

"Hello, good morning, what's with the intense gaze boss?" Ethan approaching the both of us "Oh...." He frowned while checking my clothes before a mocking smirk plays in his face "I believe that's Andrea favorite button up black shirt with her A initials emboss on it and it is giving me a low key couple vibe thing. Wearing each other clothes huh? Classic"