nepenthe
nɪˈpɛnθiːz/
noun
something that can make you forget grief or suffering.
*
Everyone needs something to take the pain away every so often, and for him, that was her.
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B L O O D Y K N U C K L E S
*
I winced as my knuckles made hard contact with the leather of the punching bag, my decision of activity yesterday still plaguing my body.
It had been maybe a year since I last caught myself in an illegal arena fight, where the same kinds of tears wracked my fists. The stripped fights were made purely for the entertainment, representing the raw human ability to hurt another to a point where they were completely broken until they found their feet again.
It was sick, in some ways. But I couldn't help but to love it when someone hit me so hard I couldn't breathe. It felt like all the times I had held myself underneath water, all the times I had hurt myself.
But the next day was always the worst, the memories of a fleeting feeling not worth the hazardous pain of it all.
The re-split skin bled once again, tracing my deep purple bruises as if they needed to be outlined and more obvious than they already were. I wasn't bleeding in an illegal fight these days, I was just fighting a man without wraps for the sake of it.
My heart jumped a beat when I heard the familiar sound of Brandy's voice greeting all those she knew in the gym.
From the mirror, I watched her walk past the door with her earphones in, ponytail bouncing in each step. A second later, she traced her steps back, pulling out an earphone and raising an eyebrow to me, "Good morning."
Her voice seemed strangely sceptical, her expression replicating the indication.
"Mornin'," I greeted back, matching her arched brow.
She entered the room, removing both earphones and folding her arms over her chest curiously, "I never saw you as an early morning gym kind of guy."
Her music was still played loudly through the earphones that were wrapped around her forearms.
'face up, untouched, craving for some healing,
take off, you're never around.′
"Don't I look it?"
'game's up, it's too much,
you're the king of cheating.
take off, i'm staring at the ground.′
"No, you look more like a late night gym dude," Her eyes focussed on something behind me, concern laced within her irises. She stepped over to the punching bag, her finger tracing over the fresh blood that had dripped from my knuckles. She turned to me with wide eyes, taking my hands in hers hastily, giving me no option of objection.
'tell me it gets easier,
that i'll figure it out.′
Brandy dropped my hands, leaving the room in an instant as I stood baffled. She re-entered moments later, taking my wrist and pulling me to a nearby bench and sitting me down like I was incapable of doing so myself.
