Servant | Taekook English version

Page 25: "I'll maim you, I'll drain you"

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......

"We are never more vulnerable to suffering than when we fell in love."

-Sigmund Freud

......

"Well," then I felt like I was about to explode.  My voice was hoarse, the pillar of my nose was aching.  "Let's try then."

While the firewood in the fireplace was crackling, the noise of the people in the room reached my ears almost like a hum, and Count Park, sitting in the seat opposite me, would be pleased with my answer that he was giving a slow smile to his big lips, which is a smile that I can tire of satisfaction, but at some point it  I was startled, I took a big sip from the glass in my hand and swallowed it hard.

Considering what I did, it was not really wrong, there was no formal or visible relationship between Count Jeon and us.  We had not spoken intense words of feelings that exceeded each other, and we did not hug each other like two lovers.

However, I still cannot stop the feeling of hypocrisy and betrayal in me.  I was supposed to look in front of me and ignore what was behind me because that would be perhaps the most sensible step I could take personally, but ... I couldn't stop it.  I couldn't cut it.  I could not throw it away and destroy it like lowering a switch, and I could not turn these colors unnaturally gray.

It was Lady Carmilla who approached us and placed her hands warmly on the shoulders of Count Park, who pulled me out of this drowned, dead and fading mood to forget where I was, while the sound of my heart breaking bones echoed in my ears.

"Julius!"  He sneered and for a moment turned his suggestive gaze towards me and lowered it back toward Count Park.  "Come on, take Theodore and join us."

Then he left the edge of the seat, and he was on the front, and I moved on, as Count Park and the two of us got out of the seat at the same time.

My cursed eyes immediately chose the man I had all my feelings for him, perhaps a few minutes ago, out of the crowd of people.  Isadora was not with her.  He was alone, holding a crystal, thin and full glass of champagne in his beautiful hand, smiling at the old man with long white beard in front of him.  Several young men were present with the man, and they listened to their conversation with interest.  Light seeping from the kerosene lamps of the pompous mansion hits his white skin, looking more appropriate for this setting than ever before.

Then, just a few feet away, their sentences reached my ears in this noise, and it was the first time I heard Count Jeon using his native tongue, bloodthirsty.

"Nagyon köszönöm. És mivel foglalkozol?"  (Thank you very much, Well, what do you do?)

As a matter of fact, Count Jeon, when speaking Hungarian, his tone grows a few decibels thick, his tongue moves more crooked, and it seemed so interesting to me that I couldn't explain it.  I had felt it when I said 'Draga' in the dream I had seen before, but I had not paid such attention.  He spoke his language perfectly and it suited him well, but I could not deny the interesting sense of activity in my stomach when listening to him speaking Hungarian.

"Oh, you are Hungarian!"  Said the old man across from him.  By this time, we had already reached them and started to listen to the conversation without missing respect, but the worst part of this job was that I could not understand anything from the words spoken.  That's when you got to learn the language, which Hoseok told me when he first came to the castle.  His counsel sat before me like a wall.  "Én vagyok neurológus."  (I'm a neurologist.) Continued the old man.