Gentle | Ushijima

15/Under The Sky

Part 2

Ushijima and I walked around the festival together. I watched the kids run around while Ushijima seemed more focused on other things like the surrounding area. It felt nice to go out with him, like an actual date.

Plus the team wasn't following us so we had some one on one for once.

We got some food and sat on a hill under a tree. We ate there and talked for a bit. I know he doesn't talk much so I try to ask him questions about volleyball to get him to talk. I don't think he realizes my tactics but at least he talks.

I got up after a bit to throw away our trash from eating. I walked down the hill and went to a trashcan to throw everything away. While I was down there, I saw Kato and Shirabu.

...They were holding hands...

Seeing them hold hands made me happy. Shirabu actually looked happy as well. Not a salty little butthead like usual. Kato looked comfortable around Shirabu, the same way he's comfortable around me.

I walked back up the hill and sat next to Ushijima with a small smile on my face. I leaned my head into his shoulder and he put his arm around me. We both looked out into the distance, looking at all the lanterns and streamers everywhere. The festival was beautiful, and I got to see it all with him.

They announced that the fireworks would be happening in a few minutes. I looked at Ushijima and he had that blank face as usual. He looked at me, then the grass, then forwards. It seemed like something was bothering him.

You: Wakatoshi, are you alright?

Ushijima: I'm fine.

You: You just.. never mind.

Ushijima: Tell me.

You: You just seem distracted tonight.. if you want to hang out with the guys, we can-

Ushijima: No. I want to stay here with you.

I felt bad but I nodded. Deep down, I felt like I was in the wrong. Maybe he wanted to spend time with the guys, or maybe he was interested in something but he didn't want to drag me along. I feel like I'm bothering him.

As I was deep in thought, Ushijima caressed my face softly and kissed me. I kissed back and he deepened our kiss. We pulled apart and there was a spark in his eyes. It wasn't lust but.. he looked enchanted.. I honestly can't tell you what it was.. it was cute though..

Ushijima: I wanted to give you something.

You: What is it?

Ushijima pulled a small box out of his pocket. He handed it to me and then he had a small smile on his face.

The box was black and velvet. I opened the box to see a cute silver ring inside with his initials carved into it. I looked up at him to see his eyes kind of sparkle. He looked happy.. genuinely happy.

Ushijima: It's a promise ring. I know we just started dating but I wanted you to have it. I want you in my life.

I put the ring in my finger and kissed him. Ushijima kissed me back. The fireworks started and I flinched which broke the kiss. I sighed while Ushijima kind of chuckled at me.

You: Your laugh is cute.

Ushijima: Hm? Oh thanks.

And as soon as I said that, he went back to being expressionless. I'm going to get a video of him smiling and laughing some day. He'll open up to me when he's ready though.

When that day comes, oh I'm so getting it recorded. I want to hear that cute ass laugh every day.

We watched the firework show together. The beautiful, colorful sparks filled the air and you could hear kids getting excited about seeing a firework. It was honestly adorable.

Ushijima would kiss my forehead once in a while during the show. You could hear music playing all throughout the festival with the fireworks just lighting up the night sky.

After the firework show, everyone got a lantern and lined up by the river side. We met up with the guys and we all decided to all let go together, as a final celebration to being the volleyball team before we graduate.

We lit our lanterns and sent them off. We all held each other as we watched the lanterns light up the dark sky. Everyone at the festival cheered while we all cried.

We only had a few months left.. it's going to be over soon. We'll all split up and start out own lives. My brother wants to be a professional volleyball player so we'll split up..

We've been side by side our whole lives. Sure, we pick on each other but he's my best friend. He's my twin.. he's my other half, quite literally. It's going to hurt to lose him.

Reon is going into volleyball, Tendo is going off to college, Semi wants to go to a college in Tokyo for the music departments, Jin is going to Sendai, and Ushijima is going to be a professional volleyball player.

We're all splitting up and going down different paths. Hell, I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life. I just-... I don't want to say goodbye yet. I don't want to lose everyone.

I wish we weren't third years. I wish we still had time. I want to hang out with everyone and be there for everyone. I don't want to go through life alone. I don't want Ushijima to leave me, I don't want my brother to leave me.

I wish I could just stay at Shiratorizawa. I wish I could stay in my dorm all day and tell Kato about all the dumb stuff I think about. I want to pull pranks with Tendo or help tutor Goshiki. I don't want to move on at all.

I wish I could start this year over. Start at the beginning again. Make more memories and be with everyone even longer.

My biggest fear is what will happen to Ushijima and I. We'll probably get separated. Long distance is really hard.. what if he meets someone better than me.. someone who can probably make him happier or fit his needs better..

...I'm not enough for anyone...