Is This The End?

CH.7 The Loss of Time.

Hey guys, this is a brand new chapter I have decided to create! This book is blowing up more than I thought it would. So I thank every one of you guys and I'm grateful for all of you. 😘 I love you guys so much.

"Disoriented. I guess that comes closest. Disoriented.." Rick is sitting with Carl in his lap. Lori is sitting close, her hands in Carl’s hair. Everyone was surrounded by a fire. Amy, Andrea, Dale, Morales and his family, Glenn, Tdog, Jacqui, Jimmy, Shane, and I.  Carol, Sophia and Ed were at their own fire near by. "Fear, confusion – all those things but…Disoriented comes closest.." Rick finished as he was holding Lori and Carl.

Dale sighs nodding his head. "Words can be meager things. Sometimes they fall short." He said speaking up in the conversation. 

Rick held on tighter to Lori and Carl sighing softly. "I felt like I’d been ripped out of my life and put somewhere else. For a while I thought I was trapped in some coma dream, something I might not wake up from ever."

Carl looks up at him with a sad face.  "Mom said you died.."

Lori lays her hand on Carl’s forehead. She doesn’t speak.

Rick looked down at him with a sad smile. "She had every reason to believe that. Don’t you ever doubt it." He said.

Lori continued to look at Carl as she spoke to Rick. "When things started to get really bad, they told me at the hospital that they were gonna medevac you and the other patients to Atlanta, and it never happened." She said sadly to him.

Rick nodded. "Well, I’m not surprised after Atlanta fell."

Lori nodded. "Yeah.."

Rick sighed at her. "And from the look of that hospital, it got overrun."

We all sat there in silence but then Shane spoke up.  "Yeah, looks don’t deceive. I barely got them out, you know?"

Rick nodded and smiled at him.  "I can’t tell you how grateful I am to you, Shane. I can’t begin to express it." He said, before Shane can speak, we hear wood clatter. Shane looks towards the direction and realized it was Ed trying to start a strong fire that we can't have. "Hey, Ed, you want to rethink that log?" He asked him as we all turn our heads to him. Ed from the distance shakes his head. "Its cold man." 

Shane sighs. "The cold don’t change the rules, does it? Keep our fires low, just embers so we can’t be seen from a distance, right?"  Ed was getting annoyed, just by Shane speaking directly to him.  "I said it’s cold. You should mind your own business for once." Ed said, making Shane get up and head towards them.

I look up sadly chuckling silently as I look down gazing at the fire that was cracking and burning in front of us.  I look up and stand up walking away from the conversation, missing my husband deeply tonight. Tears were coming in my eyes and I didn't wanna be seen like this. I walk more forward hearing the twigs snapping against my shoes, and the pebbles making clicking noises. I walk up to my tent and unzip it  walking inside of my tent zipping it up and sitting down on my bed sniffling.

I turn my head grabbing my bag and opening it up pulling out my baggie of joints, the note that came with it, and I grab the picture of me and my late husband. My legs were up to my chest, I was sitting up and leaning forward using my leg to balance my arm after I placed it onto my leg. I look at the picture in front of me examining it. I light up my joint,  tears trickling down my cheek. Taking a long drag off my joint, I sniffle continuing to look at the picture sighing. "I'm so sorry baby." I whisper to myself moving my finger to my husbands face and rubbed my finger against the picture sniffling.  "I love you so much. I wish there was more that I could've done for you,  baby.  Protect my daddy up there." I whisper to myself some more.