How To Unlove Jennie Kim

•5• Black Skies

•Lisa•

Tossing for the nth time, I Lalisa Manoban, decided to cut the shit out of the crap and stop trying to sleep in the mother fucker of a 7 pm day.

Aggressive right? I know.

You let her got into you head fucker, you let her fucker!

My head was all about the party... yes my mother's birthday

Do I go?

Do I not?

Hell to that.

I am going.

Or not..?

"Arghhh why am I thinking so much? I still have 1 day to think" the frown was visible, yes I was getting frustrated minute by minute.

I decided to go get some coffee, maybe dinner.

Grabbing my keys, heading out, finally would be able to get some fresh air, maybe even clear my head

I stopped by, noticing a supermarket.

I decided I will go with the ice cream, sweet and cold, just like me.

"Hmmm what flavor should I get?" Yeah crazy I know, I was just thinking out loud so what?

" chocolate it is." Getting the cup of the sweet choco, paying, out we go.

I noticed a nearby old seat

I decided to just sit there instead of going home and eat my sweet sweet choco.

I started digging in, feeling the sweet cold cream at the top of my tongue

"Hmmmm all time favorite." I closed my eyes when the sweet flavor got to my system.

It felt bittersweet

As usual.

Once I opened my eyes I couldn't help but to remember our moments mother, it used to be your favorite too.

I dropped the spoon along with the cup beside me, not feeling like having choco ice cream anymore.

"Looks like I would never get you out of my heart, mother..." I sighed as I looked up on the sky, it was beautiful, there were no starts, just pure black , like my heart.

Your eyes were the first thing to come in mind when I see black skies, now it was just a color

The color of my life.

"Was I really so hard to hold onto?" I, again talked to the sky instead of you, I'm sure it's going to listen just like I'm sure you are no willing to do so anymore.

"If only you choose me instead of him mother..." I gulped the pain mother, letting my saliva wash it away, maybe burying it deep deep inside.

Tears were threatening, I had to stop.

But would I really be able to do so mother?

You used to be the source of my safety, what happened now?

You used to be the source of my warmth, now look at me searching for another one's hug.

"Even the one I love didn't choose me haha" bitterness was all I have left in my voice.

"Would I ever be able to finally let go and be happy mother?"

"You know..." I stopped to chuckle dryly after all " you don't really know."

"Mother... good night, I'm heading back now... no not home , no ,not to you too, you are not my home anymore, I don't have home anymore."

"So bye mother"

Funny how I talk to myself as if it's you, you used to be myself, makes sense, now that explains why have I lost myself.

Now that I have 2 missions to do, I need more time to sleep.

1) How to unlove Jennie Kim ( ps: gonna take awhile I know.)

2) How to get a mother out of your heart (ps: is it even possible?)

"People? change, hearts? Don't."

-R

Before you end your journey here, here is a question for you, all of you so please if you are reading this leave a comment ...

Is it okay if Lisa is a girl with p? If there is any one who feels uncomfortable with that please do say so, just know there is a serious part of the story that is gonna depend on that so choose wisely! Bye! Xoxo 💋