Quarantine swipe

Rock bottom

Two months.

61 days we've been on lockdown.
I haven't go out of my apartment in two months. Four walls, that's all that I've been seeing.

Everything I needed I order it from Amazon and online shops. But most of all is only food and wine.

I had some good days and some bad days. A good day it will be me showering and sometimes exercising, And a bad day will be me not getting off the couch, talking to myself like a loony and eating cold leftovers while watching cheesy movies and screaming to the Tv.

I tried  some new things like diamond painting and sewing but I didn't had the patience for that.

Luckily for me I was able to arrange a deal with my landlord, because when I got here I payed 6 months in advance and for that he gave me 2 months free, so I had 6 months left on living here without having to pay.
I had some savings that I was using for basic necessities like wine.

But the worst thing was that my mind started to play with me. Depression was starting to make his way up to my head, and anxiety was at his full pace.
My nails were almost destroyed from chewing them, and your talking with a girl that never spends more than two weeks without a manicure, I was pretty disciplined with myself, with my looks, I always dressed nicely and arrange my caramel colored hair perfectly. This was something new for me, this wasn't me.

I felt so lonely, So useless.

I was like a piece of trash.

I spoke to my mom daily, to check on both of us. The feeling that my mom needed me was the only thing that kept me going. If not I think I would have committed suicide by now. Because I have thought of that, almost daily, maybe once every hour.

As today was a bad day I decided to watch a very cheesy movie, so I went for The Notebook, I made some popcorn and started sobbing like crazy with the corny movie.

it was such a sad movie, but Ryan Gosling is so hot.

I was so into the movie when suddenly I heard a loud bang at the wall next to me.

Wtf?

Someone was banging at my wall.

And then I heard someone's voice screaming

"Please stop it with the crying!!!!!"

My eyes widened.

Was I hallucinating?
Was I imagining things now? Omg I'm going to end on a mental hospital. Yep, I was going crazy, I was going to end in a white room with a straitjacket, drugs all over me , and some nurse feeding me soup with a spoon.

And with that thought the sobs became harder and louder.
I heard someone bang again

"Please!!!! Just stop it"

I approached the wall that was talking to me and said looking insane
"Who is this?" I yelled

"It's your neighbor, please stop crying I can't handle one more day of hearing you cry anymore" it was a male voice.

I can't believe how thin the wall was between us. Was he really there? Has he been hearing me crying everyday?
Oh god, I felt so embarrassed.

I stood there shocked, smiling to a wall. This was the highlight of my day, the most contact I have had with someone in two months.

And I think it was the first time in two months that I smiled.

__________________

A/N

please keep reading!!!

vote and follow me!