It's during the lunch break when Marianne feels like she can breathe again.
The lessons were awful. Since Anne did sit with Diana, Marianne took an empty seat behind them, at Tillie Boulter's side. Having to be in her company wasn't very bad indeed, though it felt a little awkward. Marianne was almost glad any conversation wasn't allowed during the lesson since talking to a new person would certainly make her uncomfortable. Though, she wasn't so much opposed to getting to know Tillie better and made a resolution to at least try it one day.
No, it wasn't her seating situation that Marianne didn't like - it was the lesson itself. And the teacher, Mr. Phillips, as well. Actually, it should be his duty to make learning efficient, so it was more his fault than anything else.
Once again, Marianne's always praised herself with the though of not being very judgemental on a first meeting. And, once again also, today she failed. Twice. Because Mr. Phillips, though Marianne cannot and doesn't feel in place to decide whether he's competent enough or not, doesn't seem to want to be at school at all. During the passed hours he acted as though his attendance here was a great sacrifice on his side and they should be grateful to be his students. Not even students in general, but his students specifically.
It irked Marianne the entire time, yet she was glad not to be called on. For now, sitting silently and doing her reading seemed a pretty satisfying thing to do - since there was no chance for anything better.
Anne, as she should have expected, was her complete opposite. She spoke when there was no need to be and received a few unpleasant words in return, to the whole class' amusement.
So when the lunch break finally arrives, Marianne welcomes it with relief. The first thought that appears on her mind is the one of going outside and that's what she does. It really feels nice to leave the building, even for a short moment.
Finding a seat on a fallen trunk, Marianne promises herself she will go back to the classroom. It's not like she doesn't care about Anne and would be willing to leave her on her own during the meal. She just needs a moment, that's all. Just a little time...
Well, maybe it's her fault? She's already admitted she had never been to school before, so how can she judge this one after just a few hours? All her experience with learning comes from studying under a private tutor, whose entire attention was focused on her and her brother. Mr. Gosset was invested and passionate, and really did spark the want of gaining knowledge in his pupils. And, beside his advantages as a teacher, he was also an uncommonly kind man. Always willing to offer help or advice, even if it had nothing to do with their studies' subject.
This, Marianne acknowledges, has become the picture that represents a teacher, as well as a whole process of learning, in her mind. It seems a little ridiculous now that she should compare it to education in Avonlea, which, if she looked at the matter in this way, may not even be that bad. Maybe it's just what it looks like in most places - and she's just to prejudiced to even come close to impartiality.
Sighing, she decides to come back to the building at last. Entering, she's surprised by the view of all the girls leaving the corner by the door, even Diana following behind.
"Anne?" Marianne, already a little alarmed, tries to approach the girl as gently as possible. "Did something happen?"
Anne looks up at her with resignation clear on her face. "I just don't know what I did wrong," she answers.
"Alright, make some space, will you? We'll just eat together, the loss is not on our side."
Taking a seat on the floor, Marianne can feel the other girls' stares on her, like she's doing something unthinkable and mostly improper. Like she's risking loosing their sympathy.
YOU ARE READING
₁.₀ SUPERCUT; gilbert blythe ✔
Fanfiction❝ I don't want to be your quiet afternoon crush. I could, but it will never be enough to satisfy me. It won't even come close. ❞ | anne with an e | | gilbert blythe × oc |