Oceans [A.Shelby]

FIFTEEN

LILLIAN'S BREATHS came out ragged as Arthur placed rough kisses along her skin, hair standing up on edge as she clutched tightly onto him as he sucked and nipped. Lillian felt drowsy after the first couple of rounds.

Arthur Shelby knew how to make a woman feel good, and he had learnt about every crevice of Lillian's body, every sensitive spot that had her feeling for more, he knew exactly what to do when she needed it, that was the blessing of 8 years of marriage. She was like a favourite novel to him.

And Lillian, just the sight of Lillian had its ways with her husband, even after years, he still felt the same, they moved in the same way, and just like Arthur, Lillian knew her husband better than any other.

When all was done, both laying bared on their bed, Arthur pulled his wife into his side, placing a kiss to her forehead as she moved closer to him, leg hooking over his as she tickled the skin of his arm just by her soft touch.

"I love you," Arthur muttered to her, in what he could only describe as a moment of weakness.

"I should hope so after those rounds, I don't just let any man do that to me," Lillian joked softly, Arthur letting a laugh rumble his chest for he knew, Arthur was the only man to have ever touched Lillian in that way.

"I don't always show it, but I do," Arthur added.

"I know," Lillian smiled, "despite your insufferable ways and tendency to piss me off, I'm still quite fond of you,"

"Go on, say it. I like to hear you say it." Arthur urged her, a smile turning up the corner of his lips.

"I love you, I always will, husband. Happy now?" The words made Arthur feel warm, not the warmth he got from whiskey or something stronger, Lillian made him feel warmth that he'd cling onto for days. The words made him smile a genuine smile, and swore of bad thoughts for a day.

This woman loved him, a woman who was far too good for him, who had lowered herself when she fell in love with him, and yet, she still loved him.

He fucked up, constantly, he made more mistakes than he could count on two hands and yet, she still loved him.

***

Lillian had to cringe as her heels hit the floor, she could feel the scuff marks the uneven ground were inflicting on her shoes.

"Does John actually know, you know, that he's being married off?" Lillian asked as she wrapped her arms around herself, bracing against the cold that even her fur couldn't protect her from.

"You should count your lucky stars Arthur never made you have a traditional Gypsy wedding," Polly snorted as she took in the girl who cringed at the thought.

"I wouldn't have bloody married him, I'd like to have seen him try," Lillian teased, Polly shaking her head at the woman, before they quietened for the ceremony.

To the very day, Lillian Shelby still looked exotic compared to the others, she stuck out like a sore thumb, it was plain as day that despite living in Birmingham for nearing on a decade, it wasn't her birth place.

Lillian sat wide eyed during the reception, or if one could call it that, she had thought she'd seen it all, but Birmingham continued surprising her each day as she watched the wild bunch.

Lillian dampened her red lips with whatever concoction she was handed, a cough escaping her as she glared down at the drink, "what the- you know what, I don't even want to know"

Lillian knocked it back regardless, passing some to Theodore, "here, you'll be slaughtered in 5 minutes on this, might do you some good."

They all were, including Ada who danced with Arthur as if she weren't 9 months gone, the family watching with baited breath.

"Arthur, perhaps that's enough now," Lillian cringed as she watched her sister quite literally spin out of control.

"Oh fucking hell look at her, Tommy, she needs to stop, she's spiralling out of control!" Polly swore as Ada spun around and around with Arthur.

"Ada, Ada come on now," Arthur told her, Ada pulling her arm from his grip, Tommy standing to give his brother some help

"No! Come and look Esme! Come and look at the family you've joined!" Ada's shouts attracted the attention of the whole wedding party, Polly shrinking in her chair as she closed her eyes, a headache forming.

"Come and look at the man who runs it!" She shouted once more, Tommy approaching her and grabbing hold of her arm, Ada shoving him away.

"Ada! Ada!" He called over her shouts.

"He chooses his own brothers wives," She spat, a groan escaping Polly's lips as an embarrassed look crossed her face, Lillian couldn't help but allow her lips turn up.

"He hunts his own sister down like a rat, and he tries to kill his own brother-in-law!" She shouted, Arthur wrapped his arm around his sister, Tommy going to do the same.

"No! No! Now he won't even allow me to have a fucking dance! Not even at a fucking wedding" She shouted as the whole family now attempted to calm and sit her down.

"Sit her down!" John told them, Lillian standing for Ada to take her chair before she watched an uncomfortable expression fall on her face, water trickling down her head.

"Oh fuck." Lillian stated, Polly's head snapping up as their eyes met, "water."

"Bloody hell Ada, you do pick your times," Arthur commented, the family moving as quick as possible back to Small Heath.

The night dragged on, Lillian could admit she was partially traumatised, and the sounds of Ada's shouts wouldn't escape their ears, but when the night was over, Lilian slipped into her bed not long before Arthur joined her at an ungodly time in the morning.

"Lils?" Arthur questioned as he slipped into her beside her, pulling her flush against his body as she hummed in response.

"Yes?" She replied quietly.

"watching Ada today.. do you, do you want a kid?" Lillian shuffled so she was facing Arthur who looked down at her with all sincerity.

"Don't you think it would've happened by now, Arth?" She asked him quietly as he played with her hair.

"You mean..?" Arthur looked at her confused as she looked up at him sadly.

"I-I don't know if I can, Arth. Have children, that is." She told him quietly, watching as his face fell.

Arthur's face didn't fall from the thought of never having children, it was more the thought of never seeing Lillian be the mother she'd wanted to be. Arthur Shelby was far from soft, but the idea of having a kid with his wife, was something that was a passing thought, that he believed would happen eventually. He had told himself that he'd be the type of dad he didn't have, somebody actually present in their kids life, for every second of it. The idea of that not happening, felt hard to swallow.

Arthur was sad for his wife, for he could see it was troubling her.

Instead of saying another word, Arthur placed a reassuring kiss to her lips, before pulling her closer and holding her tightly, "it don't matter, we 'ave eachother, ey? That's what matters."

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authors note; i hope you all have a happy new year my loves!