Forever Undaunted

13

August 7th
Tobias's POV
"Tris," I breathe out when I see her sitting up, eating something out of a bowl. It must be jello. River leans into my chest as I hold her. I had to explain that mommy won't remember her. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I watched the pain and sadness in River's eyes.
Tris looks up at us, confused.

"Me?" she asks. I nod slowly, looking at the nurse who has pity in her eyes. She quickly leaves the room. I walk to the side of Tris's bed and sit in the chair. "My name is Beatrice," she says. I feel my heart shatter and let out a shaky breath.

"Do you remember me?" My heart wrenches as she slowly shakes her head. Tris is my rock, my world. How do I do this without her, let alone raise three kids?

You are brave, I hear Tris's voice in my head. I remember her telling me these words. I may put up a strong front, but deep inside, I can still be the scared boy from Abnegation.

But I can't be that anymore. I need to be brave. For the kids, and Tris.

"Should I know you?"

I let a tear fall.

"My name is Tobias, but only you call me that," I smile, weakly.

"Well what does everyone else call you?" she laughs.

"Four. They call me Four, and they call you Six," I say.

"Those are strange names," she laughs again, nervously. "And who is this?" she smiles at River. I look down at my daughter, crying silent tears. My broken heart shatters more.

"This is River," I choke.

"Hi, River," she whispers.

I look up at Tris, searching her eyes. For a split second, she looks at me like she has a million times. But then her eyes return to being cold and grey, like a blur.
Tris doesn't know who I am.

Tris's POV
I lean back against the hospital bed, yearning to sink into it and never return. A woman had come into my room carrying two children, a boy, and a girl, about the same age. They looked like River. The woman gave me a grave smile before taking Four, or Tobias, and River out of the room. I watch them talk outside of my room. Four is crying. The woman puts her hand on his shoulder and wipes away a tear of her own. I watch Four pick his head up and kisses each of the children. River takes the boy and holds his hand as they walk away with the woman. Four stands outside for a minute alone, before coming back into the room.

"Who was that?" I ask, nervously. However, I feel like I should know the answer. I can't explain it. I have never met the woman, or those children, or Four and River, but at the same time, something in my gut recognizes.

"That was Christina," he chokes. "And the twins. Bellamy and Blakelyn."

"Those are nice names," I whisper. "How old are they?" Four's mouth twitches, almost into a smile. But the pain so blatantly plastered over his face prevents him from doing so. He simply nods. "When do I get to go home?" I whisper again. I feel nervous asking any question like I know the answer already.

"Home?" Four asks.

"To my parents and Caleb," I say. I remember them, but the question feels wrong.

"Tr- I mean, Beatrice, how old are you?" he asks.

"Sixteen," I say, confused. "I just took the aptitude test. The serum made me sick and the next thing I know I'm here," I say, exasperated. Four leans onto the wall for support.

"Oh my God."

I watch millions of emotions swim through Four's eyes. Pain, sadness, hurt, fear? I try to sink further into the bed. I just want to go back to sleep and never wake up. This world is too confusing for me. I feel like I am living someone else's life. Like I have forgotten my own.

"What?' I ask him. He walks shakily to the chair and breaks down. He puts his head in his hands and sobs. His body is racked as he hunches over. I stare at him, not knowing what t do. For a few moments, I just sit there watching him cry. "Four," I say quietly. He wipes his face and looks up at me. "Are you," I clear my throat. "Are you okay?"

He simply shakes his head. "You don't remember me?" He asks, his voice shaking.

"No. Should I?" I watch pain and anger boil behind his face. His emotions should scare me, I should be afraid that he might lash out at me. He is much taller, stronger, and from the looks of it, older. But I am not afraid of him. I seem to know, deep in my gut, that he would never hurt me. "Fou, I-"

"Stop calling me Four!" he shouts, spinning around. "How could you not remember?"

I feel my face become hot and tears threatening my eyes. My gut wrenches at his word. I don't know what I don't remember. "I'm sorry," I stammer. "I don't know. I just don't remember. I don't seem to know anyone and-"

"How could you not remember!" he shouts again. "Tris, I am your husband! And those were our kids! River and the twins, Blakelyn and Bellamy!" he starts crying again. I feel every part of my body twist. The next thing I know, I pass out.