Sleepless nights spent with you (Hitoshi Shinsou X Reader)

Numb to the feeling

A/N: Yes that is a song, yes you should listen to it

⚠️ SMUT WARNING ⚠️

Slamming the bedroom door behind you, you lean against it and slide down it to sit on the floor. You can't even cry. You just feel....numb. You raise your eyes to meet Hitoshi's gaze as he sits on your bed looking concerned. You're overcome by a deep, inescapable urge. You stand and make your way over to him, clambering onto his lap, straddling him as you smash your lips against his. He doesn't fight back, but slips his tongue through your open lips, letting it dance with yours, capturing your breath. While you continue your heated kiss, you begin to move your hips against his already straining crotch, eliciting a rough groan from him that you keep sealed between your lips. You're caught off-guard as he stands, holding your ass before he turns around, following you down onto the bed. He pulls back to pull off his shirt. You lean up to reconnect the kiss but he holds you in place, scanning your face with worried eyes. "Are you sure you want this?" You nod, letting your hands roam across his chest and stomach before rubbing him through his trousers. He bites his lip, groaning. "I just....god.....I want this so bad but I don't want you to regret it, (Y/N)." You lean up to his ear, nibbling on the lobe. "I want you too, Hitoshi. I want you to fuck me into the mattress so hard I can't even remember what walking feels like~" His mouth hangs open slightly before he comes in with another hot, hard kiss, making you gasp as he helps you shed all of your clothes. His lips move feverishly down your skin to your neck, sucking and biting, leaving delicious heat in their wake. You whimper as his voice vibrates through his lips against your nipple. "Condom?" It takes all your strength to point to your bedside drawer. Your mother had drilled it into you that you HAD to have some if you were going to start dating so that you didn't 'ruin your chances and future.' Looks like it came in handy. You bite you lip as he leans up to rummage through the drawer to find them while his fingers glide across your wetness causing you to moan quietly. You lean up on your elbows and watch him slide on the almost too small condom. He climbs back over you as you drop back onto the bed, wrapping your legs around his waist. He leans over you and lines himself up. "You ready?" You nod, tightening your legs to nudge him, causing his tip to push into you. It hurt. It hurt like hell. Perfect. This is exactly what you needed. To feel something. You squeeze your eyes closed as he pushes the rest of his length into you, stretching you painfully. You open your eyes when he stops. Furrowing your brows you look up into his blushing face. "W...why aren't you m....moving?" His hand comes up to brush some multi-coloured strands from your forehead. "It's obviously hurting you, Bow. I don't wanna do that." Raw emotion swells in your chest. He cares so much. You bite your lip and look away as tears prick your eyes. Why couldn't you cry before but you can now? "I....I wanted it to hurt Hitoshi...if it doesn't hurt....how am I supposed to feel something? I'm so.....I'm so numb now....I should get mad and upset but I don't...I can't even cry about her anymore...I just....I want to be able to feel something." He lets out a small sigh and your heart drops. Have you offended him? He reaches down and gently takes your hand, bringing it up to rest against his chest. Your teary eyes widen as you feel his heart thudding against his chest. He uses his other hand to cup your face, rubbing his thumb gently against your cheek. "If you want to feel something, then feel me. Feel my feelings. I....I love you, (Y/N). So...try and feel what I'm saying to you. Don't think about her, or the rest of the world just...focus on me, Kay?" You look up into his eyes, the tears slipping down the side of your face. You lean up and kiss him before resting your forehead against his. "I...I love you too, Hitoshi." Your heart lifts as you see the smile spread on his face before you gasp. He shifted his hips slightly and....it didn't hurt as much. "You'll.....mmm...you'll have to forgive me for ruining the moment but.....it's so tight....I'm at my limit." Your head drops back to the pillow and your back arches off the bed as he begins to move his hips, plunging deep inside you, grazing against your special spot. He speeds up, pounding straight into you at an unimaginable speed. Despite his animalistic movements, you never once remove your hand from over his heart, feeling it thundering against your palm, using the rhythm and the pleasure of his actions to almost ground you. Very soon, almost too soon, you feel the knot in your stomach tightening, telling you that you're close. "H...Hitoshi....I'm....I'm so close.....I'm gonna..." He buries his face in your neck, continuing the strong, rough thrusts of his hips. "Me too...mmm...gonna cum soon." Your free hand comes up and into his hair. You tug gently and he grunt, stilling his hips as he empties himself into the condom as you cum around him. He gently pulls out of you, taking off the condom and throwing it away as you lie there, catching your breath. Once he's done he leans over you, cupping your cheek and pecking your lips lightly. "Wanna share a bath with me?" You smile, rubbing your nose against his. "Of course."