Dear Heart, Letters.

Entry #18

Dear Secret.

A good two years ago I realized that I am already in love with you. I don't want you to acknowledge. Since this is a confession of love to make and a moment to let go. Please give me the chance to say it all to you...

At first, you're just a nuisance that would forever annoy me. Asking me of questions of this and that; I would barely answer but you will pester me so I would just lay down the books I am reading and listen to you. It's a feeling of familiarity, I thought since we were hailed at the same place. I thought it was just tolerating you since we speak the familiar dialect only we can understand in the sea of people. I thought I just missed home an you felt like home to me. So I decided it was just passing.

Only you don't know that when you asked me questions I have to be spiteful and look away from your eyes because it reflects of how the growing feelings slowly eating me. When ever I am alonae I have to stop myself from smiling just thinking of your foolishness but bring a thorough joy to my heart. A simple matter I thought I can ignore.
When everybody sees you with a lot of crushes, telling the name of this person to that and publicly admit that, it is just a fleeting moment of disguise since everyone around us knows that I am disgusted of you. Only my heart knows the truth.

You told me of your problems and your heartache. I comforted you but at the back my mind, I asked what about mine?

You just don't know when I realized that I love you, I have to cry and be angry to myself of how foolish I am. Just treating you a friend? Bah. It brings sour taste to my mouth.

That is why with this letter I will confess to you how many of times I have to touch my chest and feel the drum rolls inside my ribcage. Funny and cliché? but it is true. I have to stay away and flee inside the room and try to sit with a number of our friends to hide my burning cheeks.

Then I noticed how you would try to switch the pages of the book I am reading to make fun of me. I will get angry and tell you words later I will regret. My emotions will rise to its peak and fall to its pit mind you that is everyday. I hate to expect because that comes with disappointments. Simply I can't stop. That's the perks or unrequited love.
And when graduation was fast approaching, the days between school and the march was truly cherished. I never thought that I would be a stalker. My friends would chatter but all I listen is to your voice.

For months I have to stay away. Friends that is what we will ever be.

I love you. Unrequited or not. I do love you.

I am finally confessing to you since I have to let go, but this all true.

One and Only,

Your's