LOOSE - a Bill Hader Novel

XX

Two black coffees and two blueberry muffins balanced in Bill's arms as he crossed the street toward the car. He had run into the café on the corner while Emerald stayed in the rented convertible's passenger seat, basking in the morning sun. The classic car was baby blue and flashy and definitely drew attention to the couple, but they didn't care. In fact, even though a handful of paparazzi snapped photos from across the street, Bill planted a huge kiss on Emerald's lips and drew her face nearer with his large hand, leaving her woozy and smiling when he pulled away.

"Shall we?" he asked from the driver's seat, shifting the gear into drive.

They pulled away from the curb and cruised south down the PCH, wind blowing through their hair. Emerald was in a dusty pink sundress, her tiny tattoos on full display. She sipped her coffee and fed Bill little bites of blueberry muffin as he drove, bobbing her head to the Khruangbin playing through the stereo. Bill danced a little too, his linen shirt pushed up above his elbows, sunglasses shielding his blue eyes from the California rays.

Bill and Emerald were easily the coolest couple in town, and they didn't give a damn who saw them, who cared.

TMZ: EMERALD ROWAN (23) KISSES BILL HADER (45) INSIDE CLASSIC CAR IN LOS ANGELES

Cosmopolitan: Emerald Rowan and Bill Hader Aren't Shy About Their Relationship

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The animal shelter opened its doors for the day right as they pulled up, an elderly volunteer smiling and waving at Bill and Emerald. She greeted them warmly at the entrance, and guided them down a hallway of cages. Emerald held Bill's hand as they made their way down the corridor, dogs barking and whining and sniffing them as they walked along.

They were all so cute, in all shapes and sizes and colors, that Emerald wished she could rescue them all. But in the very last cage sat a big tan dog with the sweetest brown eyes she had ever seen. The dog had a little bit of an underbite, scruffy brown fur and an expression of pure love and sweetness.

"Oh," Emerald said. "Hello."

She greeted the dog through the wire, and it sniffed, then licked her hand. Beside the cage was a sign that said Meet Muffin! Female, Terrier Mix, Estimated 7 years old.

Emerald looked at Bill and he knew what she was thinking. "That dog is coming home with us, isn't it?"

After leaving a very large donation in addition to the shelter's adoption fee, Emerald and Bill brought Muffin out to the car on a leash. She sat in the back seat and leaned forward to give Emerald a slobbery kiss on the cheek.

The sun went down over the ocean that evening, Muffin tired out from her run on the bungalow's private beach. She slumped at Bill and Emerald's feet as they cuddled on the chaise lounge outside, looking at the stars twinkling above.

"Can I ask you a question?" Bill asked.

Emerald nodded.

"Would you... Would you feel comfortable meeting my kids? I completely understand if it's too soon, if you don't want to. But I'd love for them to get to know you. And vice-versa."

A grin took over Emerald's face. "I would love to meet them."

She trailed a hand down his arm and he relaxed, happy with her reply. "You're gonna love them."

"I'd they're anything like you, I will."

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