Oh, That Russian Accent

Chapter 40

 "Uhhmm, my sister and I were very close as kids. She was probably the only person I had ever loved back then. My father was headmaster at this big company and one night, he had some business friends over for dinner..." Dimitri tells me and continues, "My sister, Lada, and I was upstairs at dinner because we did not want to interact with the men downstairs. My father was never warm or nice like yours are, Ruby. He was brutal in his language but never physical. He could never lay a hand on anyone he knew, I give him that. I cannot say the same for the guys he worked with, though. They were some big, strong, scary men, especially for two teenagers.

Later that night, one of my "friends'' texted me. He wanted to meet up at some sketchy place. He was not the type to be hanging around with, but then again, neither was I. And the idiot I was, I snuck out and left my sister in our big house with our father and some strangers."

Dimitri stops talking and looks down at the bedsheet. He takes a deep breath before meeting my eyes again, but this time they're filled with tears. Dimitri is crying. I take his hand in mine and encourage him to go on if he wants to.

"When I came home late that night, I found my mother crying in her bedroom. She was hugging a pillow close to her and I immediately knew something was wrong. I remember running into my sister's room, only to find my father sitting on the floor with a heartbroken look in his eyes. My sister was laying in her bed, eyes closed and dried tears down her cheeks. I walked slowly towards her, noticing her chest was not moving. My shaky fingers found her blanket and slowly pulled it aside. Blood was spread on her bedsheets, bruises were forming on her thighs and stomach. Slowly my fingers found the way to her pulse and... my world crashed. Lada was dead."

"Dimitri," I whisper shocked and tears rolling down my own cheeks.

Dimitri doesn't respond to me but continues the story instead, "I do not remember crying, but I know I just started screaming at my father. My lungs screamed for air as I continued to scream at him, but he did not respond. Not until I quieted down anyway. He told me briefly what had happened. One of his friends had found her laying on her bed in her room. He had been drunk and had gone inside the room, locking the door behind him. My father had heard Lada's screams but no one, no one Ruby, had tried to help her. And me, I should have been there. If I had been there, she would still be alive to this day... After that, things changed. My father began drinking a lot and eventually, he left my mother and me - that scumbag. I blamed him so much, I still do, but had I been there, I-I... And when he left, my mother sold our house and brought me here to America. She has not talked about the situation or Lada ever since that night, but I never confronted her about it - she is after all the only family I have left. But it was like Lada or my father never existed and that broke me. Not about my father, but Lada... Lada was their daughter, my sister, and my world. I did not get to say goodbye to her before she was taken from this world..."

"You remember when you asked me about my scar?" Dimitri asks me while pointing at the scar he has across his eye. I nod slowly, really trying to hold myself together.

"I did it to myself... It reminded me that I left her alone, every time I looked in the mirror. I was in a really dark time when I did it, but I do not regret it. It is the only thing that reminds me of her now... Lada. It is just not as negative anymore."

I don't get to say anything before he continues, "Then when I turned 18 and my mother moved back to Russia, I decided to stay. I had just gotten into Stanford and it was the only positive thing in my life back then, so I could not give up on that. Then I met Jamie who I became good friends with, then I met you. And now, here we are," Dimitri finishes off.

Tears are now fully streaming down my face. My heart is aching for him. He's been through so much shit and I just forced him to relieve everything. Dimitri's eyes are wet too and I know he wants to cry. When none of us say anything, I pull him down on the mattress with me. My arms are closed tight around him and I squeeze all the love I can, into him.

"I love you so much," I tell him honestly, "What you've been through is absolutely horrible and I wish you never had to go through that. I love you so so much Dimitri."

I can feel my arms get wet and I know for sure he's crying now. I pull him even closer to me and I feel him cuddle his body into me, feeling the warmth and love radiating from me.

"I'm sorry I made you re-live everything. I shouldn't have made you say anything," I tell him, feeling sad.

"No, no. Do not apologize, Ruby. I love you and I wanted you to know everything. I just cannot believe you are still with me," he tells me.

"Why wouldn't I be with you? I love you."

"Well, I thought you would hate me for my sister's death. I should never have left her alone in that house - never," he rambles on, tears still falling down both our cheeks.

I release my grip from him so I can look him in the eyes. I slowly lean down and kiss him on the lips. When we break apart, I say, "Dimitri, I will never ever blame you for that. You could never have known how that night would've turned out to be. You cannot blame yourself for it. You need to realize that it's not your fault. It's that disgusting scumbag who did it to her and your father. No one else and especially not you, so don't ever say that because it's not true."

Dimitri detects my eyes for anything other than honesty, but when he doesn't find it, he grabs my neck and pulls me down for another kiss. We kiss for a few moments before we break apart. I pull Dimitri into my warmth and kiss his forehead.

"Dimitri?.." I ask him after a couple of minutes.

"Mmhmm?"

"Did they... did they ever catch him? The guy that did it?" I ask him, a clot building up inside my throat.

"Yes, he is rotting up in jail and he will never get out. But jail is too nice, he deserves to rot in hell," he spits out.

"He will eventually," I tell him and try to calm him down by running my fingers through his hair. It works and soon his breathing has slowed down and Dimitri's fast asleep in my arms. I cuddle into him and tighten my arms around him, before going to sleep myself.