Indecent Proposal

Chapter 19

After a long flight and zero sleep, her and Niall pulled into Brian's driveway. Her nerves heightened as he helped her out of his Jeep and into the house. When she got inside, she saw Brian and Connor sitting on the couch. Neither looked particularly pleased to see her, but she knew why. As she approached them, she told herself that she was doing the right thing. This is what her heart wanted and deep inside she knew she loved Shawn too. She told them she was sorry for everything and in turn they apologized as well, and Brian even confessed to pushing Shawn to stay the course with the bet. Camila understood, but again, forgave them because she could tell how much it was weighing on them. Not only was their best friend hurting, but she knew they hadn't meant to hurt her; and neither had Shawn.

Giving her coat to Connor, she kept her bag with her and followed Brian up the stairs to the room Shawn was in. She gave Brian and thankful and apologetic look before taking a deep breath and knocking on the bedroom door.

"Go away! I'm fine you idiots" she heard him growl from the other side. Her heart sank at how bitter he sounded, but she couldn't blame him. He was hurting and he had tried to fix things, but she was stubborn and ran away. She only hoped she could fix things now that she was here.

She knocked again and this time, when he didn't answer, she felt her stomach bottom out. Yet, she was still determined and decided she wasn't leaving until she'd talked to him.

Knocking again, she was taken by surprise when he flung the door open, wearing nothing but a pair of sweatpants. His hair was a curly mess and the look on his face when he saw her made her cringe.

"Camila?" He squeaked. "What are you doing here, what do you want?" He questioned defensively, crossing his arms over his chest, and stepping back so he wasn't too close. He was afraid she might slap him or try and kiss him again and he didn't know if he could handle either one.

"I came back" she started. Really Camila? Great opening!

"I see that....why? Come to slap me across the face again?" He said lowly.

"No..that's not why I'm here Shawn" she said looking down at her feet, before ultimately reaching in her bag and grabbing the envelopes Shawn had given her. Opening the one with the letter and another piece of paper she looked back up at him. Despite his swollen eyes and tear stained face, she thought he looked handsome. She always had.

"Then why are you here Miss Cabello?" He asked bitterly.

Taking a step closer to him, she locked eyes with his.

"Did you really pay for my grandmothers headstone?" She asked.

Shocked, Shawn looked away before running his fingers through his hair. "Yes" he breathed out.

"Did you really convince the men that put money into the bet to help me pay the rest of her medical bills and the funeral?" She asked again.

"Yes" he admitted quietly.

"Why?" She asked him, taking another step forward. "Why did you do it Shawn? I'd literally done everything I could to push you away; and even after all of it; you still tried, you still stayed" she said solemnly as she had to look away, tears forming in her eyes.

"Don't you get it Camila! I made a huge fucking mistake and I am so sorry for that. You've been someone I've always cared about. Even if you didn't want me around, why wouldn't I have been there for you!" He said, throwing his hands up on the air slightly, a bewildered look on his face.

"I don't know Shawn" she whispered.

"God damnit Camila! I loved you! I've loved you since you ran into me that first day in college all those years ago and I spent all this time since then just trying to show you that I cared about you, that I knew you didn't have anyone but your mother and your grandmother; and now that you don't have either one....why would I ever let someone I love feel like they are alone? Despite the bet, despite the fucking idiocy of it all; I thought you knew me better than that. I guess I'm just sorry I made you ever question it" he sighs before turning to walk back into the room.

"Shawn, please! Don't walk away from me" she begged.

"The doors still open, isn't it?" He snapped. She knew she deserved that. Boldly she walked the few more steps into his room and closed the door behind her. She watched as he put on a shirt and sat lazily on the bed. She took a few seconds to take in the sight around her. Beer bottles stood empty on almost every surface and his clothes were thrown all over the room. His TV was on. Elf was playing. Tears escaped her eyes as she realized he loved that movie too. It wasn't on after Christmas so she knew he'd found it somehow.

"Are you just going to stand there or?" He asked quietly.

She nodded no and gently placed her bag on the floor. Still holding the letter in her hands, she came and sat on the bed next to him. Turing to face him, she sat crossed legged on the edge of the bed.

"I'm sorry Shawn. I'm so sorry" she said.

He couldn't look at her, their close proximity scared him. He was afraid if he looked up, she'd disappear again. So, he kept his eyes down as she continued to talk.

And he let her.

She told him about the number of times she read his letters and cried listening to his voicemails. She expressed her gratitude for him doing something no one else would've ever done for her. He watched as she let tears spill from her eyes as she told him about her decision to move to New York, and ultimately how it was the worst decision she'd ever made. She told him how she'd cut her mother off after her grandmothers funeral and how she literally had no one left, but in her grief and hurt, she had pushed him away because she couldn't admit that she wanted him. That his friendship even after all these years and how poorly she'd treated him at times, still meant the world to her.

That she loved him too.

"You what?" He scoffed as he stood up from the bed.

"I love you too Shawn" she repeated, willing him to look at her so she could convey with her eyes that this was her truth.

"I came back because of you. Because I made a terrible mistake by leaving you. I thought I was doing the right thing, but the more I tried to live in New York and move on, I realized it wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to be back here, with you" she sighed. "I want you to look at me while I'm sitting in my office and I want you to corner me in the kitchen while we get coffee to ask if I'm okay" she said. "I want you to be the one that kisses me goodnight and texts me every morning we aren't together" she said wholeheartedly.

"I want you Shawn Mendes. I only want you"