𝖬𝖾𝗋𝖾𝖽𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖶𝗂𝗇𝖼𝗁𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋 | 𝖲𝗎𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗇𝖺𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖺𝗅

John's journal

TW: slight mention of suicide

   For anyone who wishes to know, Meredith was born on June 7, 1980. I know Mary died in '83, but for the sake of my story and timeline, she died only a few days after giving birth to Meredith.

The dates in this chapter are spread out and are at random. Please ignore my trash writing. I love you.

July 3, 1989

I had always thought the boys looked like their mother, but the resemblance that Meredith has with Mary is almost unnerving.

August 17, 1989

She tries to push my hand away when I feed her. She's only two months old and she's already stubborn.

October 8, 1989

If it weren't for the kids I'd put a gun in my mouth.

December 25, 1989

Sammy made Meredith a book about the alphabet. He's determined to teach her to read.

January 11, 1990

She grabbed my gun instead of her rattle. I almost lost consciousness.

May 22, 1990

Her hair is a nightmare and is always in knots. I want to cut it, but Dean won't let me.

August 14, 1990

Meredith took her first steps today. They were towards Dean.

September 21, 1990

Meredith said 'Dean' today. I had never seen him look so proud.

February 4, 1991

Meredith needed a new car seat today. It took me 30 minutes to set up. Whoever invented them, I wish them nothing but the worst.

April 13, 1991

Sam tried to get her to say 'Frog', it didn't exactly come out that way.

October 24, 1991

She won't stop crawling. I have half a mind to wrap her in bubble wrap.

March 30, 1992

Meredith asked about Mary today. I had to leave.

April 1, 1992

I guess the boys said something to her. She never asked me again.

June 7, 1993

Meredith turned four today. Her hair caught on fire from the birthday candles. Dean still doesn't want me to cut it.

December 12, 1996

She's been asking a lot of questions. I suppose I'll have to tell her soon.

January 29, 1997

She's been staying with Bobby while we hunt. I guess her and James Fraser's son have gotten awful close. I don't like it.

September 10, 1999

I told Meredith today. I didn't really have a choice. She held on to my leg and refused to let go until I told her why we always left.

May 8, 2000

She's giving me gray hair.

August 28, 2002

Stefan Fraser called me today during a hunt. He wanted to talk to Meredith. I still don't like that kid. Dean doesn't either. Sam says he's good for her.

February 14, 2003

Sam left for college tonight. Meredith won't stop crying.

June 4, 2004

She went on her first hunt today. She did good. She smiled a lot, she looked like Mary.

November 16, 2005

I have to leave the kids. Something's coming. Dean can take care of Meredith. He always has.

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