Just A Nerd

Chapter Nineteen

LISA

Seeing her for the first time for as long as I could remember, I can't help but hug her tiny body against mine. Her warmth reminds me of our bittersweet times, and also the days when she was so clingy to me back in the day; I love that so much. I would trade my life for experiencing it the second time, but I hate to admit that she changes, and I have small hope to be that someone again.

Somehow, her eyes tell me that she misses me too, but I can see that she builds the defense against us. I want us to be us like before, but sadly there is no us anymore.

Right now, it's different.

She doesn't want to be in my arms anymore. Look like I am the only one who has been waiting for the time to come back and returning to her, but I can't blame her for that though, because I had left her without even a word.

It's my fault.

I came here to explain myself, hoping that she would understand my silly mind, and my stupid mistake. I was thoughtless to believe that when I come back with everything that I could offer to her, she would gladly come back into my arms like some kind of a puppy.

"Follow her, idiot. What are you waiting for?" Jisoo pushes me by my shoulder as I get out of my bitter thought and runs after the love of my life.

With her dress and high heels, she can't be that far, so I take a deep breath and bolt after her.

"Jennie!" I see her figure disappearing into the corner. I am sure she can hear me but doesn't stop, thanks to my long legs, I outrun her and stop in front of her, panting heavily. She is about to turn back, but I grab her wrist, pulling her against me for the second time. I miss her body against me so much. "Don't run...please." I close my eyes, inhaling her familiar scent. "I am sorry." I utter after managing to calm down a bit.

That's when she pushes me away angrily, "Sorry for what, Ms.?" She laughs sarcastically. She looks away, becoming so cold immediately. She doesn't even want to call my name. How worst it has turned out already, huh?

But I won't give up on us easily this time.

"Sorry for leaving. Sorry for not telling you..." I lean forward, but she takes two steps backward. Her eyes somehow show pain and regret, but she brushes it off and shakes her head slightly. "No...don't utter another word."

But I don't listen. She's usually the stubborn one between us, but this time I am the one. "Sorry for failing you... for thinking that I need to become someone that is suitable for you even without being asked. I am sorry...for trying to be someone potential for you first...for thinking that you will accept me like nothing happened...like it didn't hurt you...didn't hurt both of us." My tears flow down for the first time since I came back.

I know I would break down when I see her. The girl I love since high school. Her sweet innocent face turns into a beautiful grown-up woman I have ever seen. "You are so beautiful." I blurt out as her eyes widen at my unexpected statement as I wipe my pathetic tears with the back of my hand.

"Seem like American girls aren't your type." She jokes, but I shake my head in denial. The fact that she knows I went to Harvard isn't a surprise at all because aunt Dara had already told me that there were some friends of mine, who she had met accidentally. She even teased me that I had a beautiful high school friend that I hadn't told her about.

That's one more reason that Jennie should hate me for. My aunt knows Jisoo and Rosé, but she didn't know Jennie at all. In fact, she hadn't met Rosé before, but at least she knew her name and met Jisoo.

Back to her question, I answer. "It's not true." She narrows her eyes in confusion as I continue. "Well, partly true because I have only one type, and-"

"Asian girls." She says, proudly like she used to be when she thinks she guesses something right.

"No. It's Jennie type."

She shakes her head, looking away. "No. No one leaves their type alone if they truly love them because..." She turns to me before continuing, "It's only one. Leaving means allowing someone else to take it away." I step forward, "But, I come back now. Can you give me a chance, then?"

"It's too late."

"You said you would wait for me." I hate bringing up her last words before I left her, but I can't help. She can't just do that to me. I know I am selfish, but I need a chance to fix it up, and I will do everything to make it up to her.

I am waiting for you, Lisa.

The phrase that keeps me going when I was down and alone.

"You never ask me to wait." She turns to leave, but I stop her again. This time, I won't let her away from me. "I am sorry, Jennie. Please, forgive me. I'll do anything for you."

"Anything?" She asks, pain in her eyes as I nod in agreement. "Then, leave me alone. Never show up again."

I release my grip on her. "Why?" I ask when she doesn't reply, I add, accusing her even if deep down I know it's not her fault. "You broke your promise."

She turns her back on me, stating loudly. "And, you broke me..."

Then, she leaves.

My tears fall, but I don't have any strength to fight anymore for today. When I follow her, wanting to make sure that she's okay, there is a car suddenly stopping in front of her as a man gets out and runs toward Jennie and hugs her hard.

Mino.

Finally, everything clicks.

Like she said, it's too late already.