Just A Nerd

Chapter Seven

LISA

"She likes you." Yeri's words make me whip my head in her direction within seconds. Besides Jisoo, there is no one has ever told that to me. Everyone has no thought that Jennie Kim likes me, or I am likable enough for her. But, the way Yeri says it really makes me feel like it's okay for me to not acknowledge the feeling of being liked by Jennie. It's intimidating to me because I am such a coward to handle such situations.

I needn't know about it. It's completely useless, but anyway, it really helps me at some point because if I know it, I can pull myself back from her as much as I can.

I slower the walk before denying, "No, she doesn't."

She looks at me seriously before finding the words she wants to say. "She doesn't like you. Yes. She loves you." The word 'love' causes me to choke mentally. This girl is not really close to me, and she has the gut to say something like that. I curve my brow up, acting as if I don't know what she was talking about when deep down everything is clear as the sky.

I sigh, "You were talking nonsense," Then, I walk a little bit faster. Why does she need to be this nosy to me? Yeri is just supposed to be my new friend; she doesn't need to be Jisoo number two, who always insists on me about Jennie.

"Lisa, just think. No one with their right mind kisses you when they don't have any feelings for you. Moreover, just look at her face when I grabbed your arm. The girl literally killed me with her eyes. I am a girl, and I know how she feels." She explains more as she tries to catch up with my fast walking, half running.

"A friendly way," I respond as she narrows her eyes, waiting for more explanation. So, I do. "She did it in a friendly way, and for your information, I am also a girl, therefore, I know how she feels, and how I feel." I finish, avoiding her gaze.

She scoffs, "Okay, ignore it. Ignore her. Ignore the situation as much as you want, but a person with good eyes can really see how the rich kid feels for you."

"Yeri!" I grit my teeth, not wanting to throw tantrum at her in any possible way. Her eyes soften a little bit, probably terrified at my warning tone. "I am sorry. I just want to point it out to you. You look clueless, and it's not good."

Then, we continue to walk in an oppressive silence before we reach the front of her house. "Bye, Lisa." She mumbles. I don't respond as she hesitantly turns around.

"Yeri, thank you for pointing out." I state loudly as she turns around with her usual and friendly smile. This girl smiles a lot, and I have no idea how to do like her when my life is in such a situation, but I figure I will learn to be like her soon enough if we hang out more. She's a good girl after all. No harm in making more friends, anyway.

"Yeah. And, sorry-"

"No need to apologize. You are not wrong. You are just curious as a friend?" I offer her my hand as she nods immediately before grabbing it. "Even if we just knew each other, I totally feel you. Let's be friends." She grins widely.

---

After working, I came back home, doing some school stuff, and thinking this evening scenario again and again. Why did she have to kiss me? Why did she have to make it so hard for me?

A lot and a lot of questions come into my mind as the answer is nowhere to be found. Yeah, like Yeri said, she knows how Jennie feels for me, and I think I know too, but sometimes, I want to be in denial to just defend myself from the future catastrophe than to accept it and hurt in the future. It's too difficult for me to decide whether to pull back or to go with the flow, but as for my situation, I have no choice at all.

I hate myself for having no choice. I hate myself for being a coward, but I hate her more for making it hard for us. For me.

When I first saw her, I thought it's just the stupid feeling of having a crush on someone like some teenagers out there. But, when I get to know her more, or more likely, to see her more in classes and every time she approaches me to ask me a favor, I know it. I fall for her. Hard.

This evening really shows me how she feels for me. I know the lessons she asked me to explain to her. She told me she hasn't attended that class at all, so she didn't catch up, but she has no idea I am also the creepy girl, which I used to call her for stalking me, who always searches for her when she isn't looking or even notes the day she didn't come to school.

You can't blame me for that. Jisoo is the one who told me every detail of her being. I don't ask, but she says I really need to know. It's just my pride that prevents me from asking about my so-called crush. And, I hate it again. It's true.

It's the feeling of having a crush on someone, and you want to know everything about that person.

Well, back to this evening, I know she lied. She has attended that particular day, and on that day, she was the one who has been asked to explain to the class about the lesson. She explained so well to the point where the teacher noted her name and gave her more marks for class participation.

It's good, though. It's even great, but the matter is she lied to me because she wants me to explain them to her again.

I sigh for a hundred times, putting my arm on my forehead.

What can I do?

Should I try to show her that I am not interested in her?

Well, I did it before, but it seems it doesn't get any better. Maybe, I need to try harder and more persistent. That's what I am going to do.

It's like fate is not really on my side because that night I dream.

In my dream, I see her smiling face. She kisses me a few times on the cheek. She hugs me tightly, crying, and begging that I should stop running away from her.

I cry too, but I still do it. I run away, and I will hurt her in the process.

I know.