the tutor | choi beomgyu

chapter 29: chemistry

12:13 PM, Tuesday, May 5th, 2021

[FLASHBACK]

I wonder if that cigarette smell is still up there, you pondered as you walked down the hall. I want to be upset but it kinda makes sense to smoke where there's no cameras, you were thinking about how certain students would leave a scent of cigarettes after going up to the roof. Once you turned down another corner, you stopped. Any administrators still here? you snooped around. Okay, good, you just had to make it down to the end of the hall. You passed a water fountain which immediately put your mind somewhere else. Water fountain? Do I need to refill my water bottle? Wait, have I ever even used that fountain? Did it have one of those automatic dispensers? Should I go back to check? as your mind was off in water fountain land you had let your guard down. Which caused you to not notice the door to the chemistry lab slide open, only coming to your senses after feeling a hand on your arm. The hand yanked you of out the hall into the room, not being able to yell before the door was slid closed again.

"W-what was that for?!" you asked with a frazzled expression. Hwang Hyunjin stood next to the door chuckling, his hand gripping your arm.
"Your face was so funny!" he laughed. You furrowed your brows.
"What do you need?" you asked.
"Let's eat in here today!" he smiled.
"What? You sure?" you said, turning around and looking out the door window.
"Yeah, it's actually quite peaceful in here," he turned around and began walking towards the back off the room.
"What, did you try spending a lunch break in here?" you folded your arms.
"I did in fact," he turned back around to face you.
"Pffft don't go thinking you know what it's like now," you walked over to him.
"What it's like?" he asked.
"Spending your lunch breaks alone," you said.
"Don't you have friends?" he asked.
"Huh? Yeah, why?" you were confused at his random question.
"Why don't you just eat lunch with them?" Hyunjin approached the back counter of the lab.
"Well, I do sometimes, but I like having my lunch time on the rooftop too," you watched as he jumped up onto the counter, his long legs dangling from it.
"That does sound like you," he said while patting the area next to him, as if asking for you to join him.
"But won't your friends come looking for you if you skip out on too many lunch periods?" you asked as you hopped up on the counter.
"Yeah, probably, but I can just make up an excuse," he shrugged. You observed that the chemistry lab had a warm temperature, and a nice mood to it when the strong ceiling lights weren't on to blind you. You and Hyunjin's legs dangled next to each other, and your hands resting on top of one another's.
"Shall we eat?" he turned his face to yours. It felt like the world slowed down, as his face grew close to yours. With the help of the sunlight, his facial features were amplified right before you. From his lashes to the small mole underneath his eye, it was all beautiful.
"Hm?" he titled his head.
"Did you bring lunch today?" you snapped out of it.
"No," he said.
"No?" you were surprised.
"I don't feel like eating," he said.
"But didn't you just say we should eat?" you asked.
"Yeah, I'll only eat if you feed me though," he said.
"Ugh," you rolled your eyes jokingly, as you jumped off the counter. He watched from the counter as you opened your book bag, revealing a lunchbox. You walked back over, dropping the lunch box on the counter spot where you were just sitting.
"You're lucky I pack a big lunch," you said.
"Don't feed me all of it," he chuckled. Something was pulling at you inside. Why wouldn't he want to eat? you wondered. That was only today though right? We've eaten out together lots of times, you thought. I hope it's nothing, you thought as you opened the lunch box.
"Do you just not pack your lunch on the days you don't feel hungry?" you asked.
"I mean yeah, it's a lot of work to pack lunch," he said. You pulled out a pack of dried seaweed, ripping it open.
"Why don't you just get school lunch?" you gestured a seaweed piece towards him.
"C'mon, nobody gets school lunch," he said. He opened his mouth as if asking you to put the seaweed in there for him. You gave in, scrunching it up and pushing it in his mouth.
"Pshh, what do you mean nobody gets school lunch, so many people buy lunch," you removed a crumb of seaweed from the corner of his mouth as he chewed. He gave you a look, that spoke for itself. Oh, no one in his "circle" buys lunch, you realized.
"Well how can you know you won't be hungry?" you asked. He swallowed the seaweed.
"I guess I just do, I don't know," he shrugged.
"Well, I guess I'm gonna have to feed you everyday," you sighed. He smiled joyously, clapping his hands together. You felt happy, yet also still slightly worried.
"In the mornings, I'll make you rice balls you can eat on the way to school," you told him as you opened a container.
"Every morning?" he asked.
"Do I look like a personal chef?" you chuckled.
"I thought so," he said.

You leaned on the edge of the counter, looking up at Hyunjin as you two talked and ate.
"Come here," he opened his legs, patting the side of the counter in between his legs.
"What?" you asked as you basically stood in between his legs as he sat on the counter.
"Thank you for feeding me," he batted his eyelashes.
"Is this you using your pretty privilege to try and make me kiss you?" you asked sarcastically.
"Huh?? Why would I ever want to kiss you!" he folded his arms.
"Wow~" you scoffed.
"So?" he raised his eyebrows. You placed your hands on the top sides of his head.
"Close your eyes," you pointed a finger at him. He mouth the word okay and shut his eyes. You slowly inched your face closer and closer to his, observing his calm face. A grin began to spread across his face once he could feel how close you were getting to him. And just when the moment was right, you poked out your lips and pecked him on the forehead. He immediately opened his eyes.
"Hey!!" he whined.
"What?" you held in your laugh.
"You are a mislead-er!" he said.
"I don't think that's a word Hyunjin," you chuckled.
"Whatever," he rolled his eyes. You were thinking about going back in for a kiss when shock spread across Hyunjin's face.
"Get down!" he whispered to you, as he jumped off the counter. You quickly crouched down with Hyunjin, confused as to what was going on.
"I hear people coming down the hall," he whispered. Your heart sank a bit.
"Oh," you nodded. Maybe if things were different, hiding in the lab would have been a cute memory to you, but in reality it was just painful. The two of were just sitting in silence, Hyunjin's eyes stuck to the door, while yours were lost in thought. I hate this feeling, you thought. I hate hiding like this, I just want to be free from it, you sighed. Your sigh must've had enough emotion to make Hyunjin's head to turn to you. He noticed your sad expression as you stared at the floor. I'm still doing this huh, you thought to yourself. You felt powerless. Maybe a relationship like this just doesn't work, maybe it's time to end it. I don't know how much longer I can do this- your train of thought was stopped. Hyunjin lifted up for chin, his lips pressing up against yours. You closed your eyes as if it was a reflex, falling underneath his spell in seconds. He slowly pulled away, an innocent look on his face. He must not know what it feels like.

a/n: gorl ofc he doesn't know what it's like his head is literally so far up his —&/&&/&:&: he can't even hear you atp. IF UR READING THIS I LOVE YOU THO THANK U AND DONT FORGET TO VOTE ONLY IF U WANT THO!