Jordan Voight: Teenage Years

Heart To Heart

*Post 6x2*

Jordan- 16

Jay Halstead was at Chicago Med getting checked out after being shot. He was still very emotional after his father's death and after Voight went off on him the older Sergeant had put his detective on furlough.

He sat on the bed, his eyes wide as his eyes glossed with tears he didn't let them fall. He still remembers his last words to his father right before he died. He had called him an ungrateful prick and that burned into his head forever.

Jordan quickly walked through the hospital trying to find Jay. She had heard what happened to the detective; she was worried and furious. They had just buried Alvin and now they were almost close to burying Jay next. She found his room and went in.

The detective was broken from his thoughts as he looked up at the teen. He stayed silent not knowing what to say.

"Are you ok?" Jordan asked.

"I'm fine". Jay replied with no emotion.

" Good. What the hell were you thinking?"

"I wasn't".

"Clearly. Jay we just buried Uncle Alvin and now we were about to bury you too! You could have died!"

Jay sadly looked up at the teen. "You don't understand Jo".

The teen then shot him a look of anger. "Excuse me. I know you didn't just say that". Taking a deep breath she looked at him with the glare still on her face. "Let me ask you a question Jay, did you have both your parents growing up?"

The injured detective stayed quiet as he looked down, that only caused Jordan to get more angry.

"Answer the question dammit, did you have both your parents growing up?"

"Yes I had both my parents growing up".

"Good for you because I didn't. I had my mother for 5 months of my life before she was killed. Wanna know what it's like growing up without a mom? It sucks ass. Kids at school telling me my mom left because she couldn't stand me, she couldn't take how ugly I was, I know what it's like to lose a parent. Regardless of how old I was I know what it's like, don't you ever say I don't know what it's like because I do. I never got to know my mother, the only way I gotta know her is what my dad tells me, the pictures". The teen's voice began cracking. "I never got to grieve my mom because I was too young when she died. You got to have your mother, you did more with her than I got to do with my mom. All I had growing up was my dad and my brother, yeah I had Erin, Trudy, Alvin, Meredith, but in reality all I had was my dad and brother. Do you know what it was like every mother's Day and my mom's birthday for me? I had to go to a grave to see her. You didn't have to, you got to be there for her, you gotta hold her, hug her, you had everything I didn't".

The tears from Jay's eyes began to fall as he finally spoke. His voice cracked and filled with pain and sadness. "The last thing I told him was he was an ungrateful prick. Those were my last words to him".

Jordan felt tears fall from her eyes as she remembered something. "What I'm about to tell you I've never told anyone, the only people who knew were me, my dad, and Erin. It was a month to my seventh birthday, my dad and I went to Walmart to get some stuff when he wasn't looking. I snuck away to look at a bike. I was at the age where I wanted something new so I could fit in so I told my dad about the bike and he said no, I started acting like a total brat about it and I didn't even realize what I was saying. I told him that I hated him all over a bike. A couple days went by and I still didn't know what to say to him, I was at school and Erin came to get me. She told me something had happened to my dad". Her lip began wobbling. "The whole way to the hospital all I could think was, what if those were my last words to him? What if he died knowing I hated him over a bike? Nobody would tell me anything because I was too young and because of my dad, I thought I had lost my only parent I had. When we finally got to the hospital and I saw him, I had never been so relieved. All I kept telling him was I'm sorry. He knows I didn't mean it and I know you're dad knows you didn't mean it. Your dad knows you and Will love him no matter what you did, what you said, no matter what all you may have been too damn stubborn to admit it but he knows Jay". More tears began falling from her eyes as her voice was cracking more. "I told you before Jay, I already lost one brother don't make me lose another. I'm barely able to hold myself together right now as it is, I'm trying not to fall apart because I know my mom, Justin, Lexi, and Uncle Alvin wouldn't want me to do that. I've already lost enough people Jay, my mom, my brother, my sister in law and nephew, Erin, Lexi, and now Uncle Alvin. Meredith won't even talk to me anymore because she can't stand to look me in the eye, she doesn't even consider me or my dad family anymore. So you can say I lost her too. All I have left is my dad, you guys, everyone at 51, a few people here. You, Adam, Kevin, and the others guys are my brothers, the girls are like my sisters. If I lost my dad or one of you, I don't know what I'd do because all of you are all I have left. I told you before, I lost one brother please don't make me lose another".