Honest Lies | soojin

Part 3: Pink: a Shade of Red

I can hear the wall clock ticking as I lay in my bed wide awake. It was thirty minutes past ten o'clock. Too late for me to stay awake, too early to sleep for my younger room mate, but she did managed faster than me. I could hear her soft puffs of air even though she's above my bed.

I couldn't talk to her, she wouldn't give me the chance. All night long, even during dinner, she was staying close to the two Unnies.

I missed her. I miss her scent, does that sound weird? Even her hair that she doesn't like washing very so often because of her phobia with water, I find myself searching for it. Craving for it. I miss her warmth whenever she'd lay in my bed even though she has her own, just a few inches above. I miss her clinginess even if it pisses me off sometimes.

She did ate the food I cooked for dinner earlier, but she didn't even compliment them just like she does every night. Shuhua-ya... I'm sorry if I hurt you.

I felt some shifting above me, so I pretended to sleep. There's a small wish inside me hoping that I just thought wrong and she never read the text, and she just had a bad day today that's why she's acting detached, but after a few seconds... nothing happened. I thought she'd go down and pester me or something. But she didn't. A slow and heavy sigh left my lips.

I opened my phone and clicked the app that first caught my attention. My gallery.

I scrolled and scrolled, most of the pictures that I can see, belongs to Shuhua. She loves using my phone even for photographs. A sad smile crept on my lips.

I felt terrible.

When I finally got so mad at myself for this mess I'm causing, I decided to go watch a movie. Again. We already watched a movie a while ago, but since I can't sleep anyway, and I don't have anything to do tomorrow. Movie marathon it is.

I was about to open the television, but I noticed the lights on the kitchen.

Minnie-unnie was sitting at the counter, she was humming to a tone I can't recognize. Her eyes were closed, and between her lips is a pen, while her hand holds a notebook, the other, tapping on the counter.

I cleared my throat.

She was obviously surprised to see me and almost fell from the chair.

"Oh my God! You scared me!" Minnie-unnie hissed. A hand now on her chest while she gasp for air.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."

There was an awkward silence that has never been there before between us. It was the first time that we were alone to ourselves since we had that heated exchange.

She watched me fidgeted with my hands holding the remote.

"So... Do you need anything?" A relief washed over my body when Minnie-unnie cut-off the silence. I was never good at that. But somehow, Minnie-unnie always knew what to say or do at such situations.

"I... No, it's nothing. I was just curious who's in here." I gestured on her notebook. "Are you still working on your song?"

Minnie-unnie seemed surprised, "W-What song?"

Why is she turning red? Was she embarrassed about me knowing? There's nothing to be embarrassed about though, the lyrics were good.

"I saw that notebook once or twice before at your room while cleaning. There's a lot of lyric drafts written in Thai at the first few pages, but I was assuming they were translated into Hangeul when you started learning it? I read that, and it was good." I passed over her to get some water from the refrigerator. "I think you should show it to Soyeon-ie someday, maybe she could arrange the melody and produce it? It would be a waste not to."

I poured a glass for each of us. Thank goodness that she accepted it while she considers my suggestion. When her eyes met mine, I knew she already has a decision.

Minnie-unnie nodded, then opened her mouth but hesitated. "Can I tell you something?"

My lips went dry so I drank some. She's so serious, I could already tell this conversation wouldn't be good.

"Uhh.. Yeah, sure."

"Shuhua." Just the mention of her name, my breath hitched in my throat. I knew this would be about the text. "She... read something from your phone. Well, I know I shouldn't be the one saying this. Obviously, you should clarify this thing with her. But she's being distant from you, isn't she? Ever since this morning?"

I nodded. Minnie-unnie's statement only confirmed my suspicion.

And she's definitely right about our argument. I shouldn't have kept my relationship a secret. At least, not from them.

"Did she... Did she say anything else?"

"She's suspecting that you're in a secret relationship." Minnie-unnie looked at me with worry, "She looked so sad, Soojin-ah. If you could see her earlier while saying all of these, it'll break your heart."

I know. Everything's my fault.

"I honestly don't know what to do, Unnie. I tried all night to have the chance to talk to her, but I guess she's really mad at me. She even slept earlier than usual to avoid a conversation. And it's a Friday night..!"

I exhaled loudly.

"You can't blame her now, can you? You've been the closest one to her ever since she started living with us. She looks at you and everything you do with hearts on her eyes. She adores you." Minnie-unnie took a sip on the water I gave her. "I didn't mean to intrude with your situation, but you guys are important to me both. Did you know how bad I felt having that argument with you? It sucks, Soojin-ah. Don't let this thing with Shuhua come down into that between you two."

Leave it to Minnie-unnie to slap me at the face with her words and caress it at the same time.

"I don't know, Unnie. I felt like every words that would come out of my mouth would just hurt her. Especially the truth." I stared at the floor, to my socks-covered feet. "I never admitted it, but you're right. I should have placed a little more faith with you guys. Secrets only bring cracks to every relationships."

"No. You're right. It's your life, you can do whatever you like with it. It's not your responsibility to tell us anything." Minnie-unnie said in an attempt to copy my voice.

I looked up at her and saw her... smiling?

Oh, I see what's happening here.

"So, now you're using my words just to tease me?"

"Ha! You know I'm damn right the first time!" She smirked arrogantly, and then did another impersonation, "We're not your family, isn't that right? And it's not your business to tell us anything blah blah blah."

I laughed hearing my own words came out from her mouth, I sounded ridiculous now that I'm hearing it myself.

"I'm sorry again, Unnie. And thank you for telling me about Shuhua. I'll do the best I can to fix this."

"You better promise me that you would, or else I'll kiss you on your cheeks non-stop!" I took a step back on her threat.

She knew very well I don't like skinships. I was seriously threatened by it. I backed away from her as she continues to pucker her lips and give me flying kisses.