Before I say anything about your book I want to remind you that these are just suggestions! I am by no means a professional:) I am sorry if I was a little harsh, it was not mean to hurt you in any way! okay let's get to it!
Cover: 9/10. I like your cover but you should include your username so no one tries to steal your cover:)
Grammar: 9/10. Some mistakes but not many; I may have not caught them all.
Descriptions: 7/10. There weren't many descriptions. Maybe when lex first sees hades she can describe what he looks like, also when she's talking to her friends add something like: "the sun reflects off of her beach blonde hair and makes me green eyes stand out. her clothes hug her figure just right." Readers like to vision where the character is at so maybe when she's in her room you can say something like: "I walk into my abnormally small room. The yellow colored walls make the room seem a little brighter. I walk over to my bed which is in the corner of the room." Maybe something like that.:)
Characters: 10/10. I loved your characters. I liked how Lex had a sense of humor and how she joked around with her family.
Real life situation?: 8/10. It would be a big coincidence for some of these things to happen, like the only seat available in the class is beside Lex, or how they get paired together.
Cliche?: 8/10. I feel like your book is kind of predictable so far but that's not a bad thing:)
Total: 51/60
Final review: What I have read of your book so far, I like it!! You use the word "I" and "my" a lot. I make this same mistake in my books. I know it's hard to not use those words in first person but varying those words would help a lot. When she loses mason I didn't really feel her sadness. It needs to be more dramatic, maybe something like this: "I heard the lines go flat and I felt like all the oxygen had been sucked out of my lungs; my world has stopped spinning. Tears start sprouting out of my eyes, I don't even try to stop them. I just lost my everything." Maybe something like that:) even though it was a dream it needs to be a bit more descriptive:) I also think you used too many commas, but I'm no English teacher:) you did vary some of your words very well. I feel like your book is kind of predictable, but thats not a bad thing though! Overall I liked it! I hope this helps:)
Just another reminder: THESE ARE JUST SUGGESTIONS, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO USE THEM!! IM NO PROFESSIONAL:)
YOU ARE READING
Lauryn's Book Reviews
De Todo{⚠︎︎} 𝗼𝐩𝐞𝐧 {} 𝐜𝐥𝗼𝐬𝐞𝐝 {}𝗼𝐧 𝐡𝗼𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲'𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐲𝐲 𝐭𝗼 𝗺𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐛𝗼𝗼𝐤𝐬 If you think your book is good but you really just need someone to tell you what you're doing right and what you're doing wrong, you've...
