The Way You Hurt Me

Chapter Nine

Warning: towards the end of the chapter there's a sexual innuendo with adult themes

I'm startled awake by my alarm blaring. I groan as I shut it off and slump back into bed to hide under the covers. Maybe if I just lay here all day I can ignore my problems and forget the past couple of weeks. I hate that boys are so annoyingly exhausting. This is all so stupid.

I get up and walk into my bathroom, staring at my sleepy features in the mirror. My blue eyes look gray in the lighting and my dark hair is frizzy and untamed. The bags under my eyes are even more prominent today and I can feel a pimple forming on my forehead.

What a lovely start to the day and honestly, at this point I don't even care.

I brush my teeth, try to tame my hair a bit, and wash my face. I instantly feel better. I eat and finish getting ready, grabbing my computer and sliding it into my backpack.

I stand at the door to the apartment, staring at the old beige carpet and a dark brown stain that looks suspiciously like throw up.

I don't know where to go. I don't know if I should meet Mason or if I should just ignore him and go do work in the library, or if maybe I should check on Josh.

I decide I'm just going to walk out the door and see where I end up.

I somehow find myself outside of Skid's. I don't know whether I'm disappointed in myself or at peace with the decision. Either way, I want to at least still be friends with Mason. Yesterday doesn't have to change anything, I don't even really understand why I feel any animosity towards him, but I know that I want to talk to him some more. Not just about him and Jessica, but about normal everyday things too. I'm not ready to give up such a short-lived friendship.

When I walk inside the coffee shop it's five past ten. I take in my familiar quaint surroundings as I gaze over people trying to find Mason. Finally, in the back corner, at the same table Ronnie and I sat at the last time we were here, I see his light brown hair.

I take a moment to steady myself before walking over and sliding into the booth.

Mason's head jerks up from his phone screen, his eyes shining with disbelief. "You came." His voice is awed and his eyes are wide. He looks me up and down from what he can see over the table as if still in amazement.

"I did," is all I reply.

Once he starts to realize I'm most certainly here I can see the surprise fade and sorrow start creeping in. Oh no.

I tilt my head to the side, studying him more carefully. His dejection is expanding rapidly, taking over his whole face and my heart can't help but clang in sadness. Maybe even guilt.

"What happened?" my voice is a whisper, too aware of all the people around us.

Mason's eyes look anywhere but at me and he clears his throat. "I texted Jessica asking her to come to my place last night to talk." He pauses, grabbing for his coffee in front of him and taking a sip. That's when I notice another cup with iced coffee placed in front of me.

He bought me coffee without even knowing if I was going to show up?

My heart swells.

"She came over around nine and could tell something was up," he continues. "I think what hurt the most was the fact she wasn't even mad. She agreed with me and said she thought we'd been growing apart for months. Then I started to get confused and asked her why she hasn't said anything and she said she didn't want to upset me in case I didn't feel the same way about our relationship." He cuts off, closing his eyes to take a moment. "I was upset she never tried to talk to me about this. I thought maybe if she had things could've been different, but I tried hard to listen to what you said about not thinking about the what-ifs." He clenches his jaw. "She was just waiting for me to break up with her and I can't understand it. She realized way before I did that our relationship was fading and yet she stayed. I kept asking her why, it was like she didn't want to answer the question and when I finally got her to her answer she said it was because we were still happy enough and there wasn't anyone else for her then."