The Way You Hurt Me

Chapter Twenty-Four

"Rena?"

I hear my name and feel a slight touch on the side of my face. I slowly open my eyes to see Josh's groggy face right in front of mine. His eyes are still red-rimmed and a little puffy from crying but he still looks good.

It's still dark out so I'm guessing we've only been asleep for a few hours, though dawn can't be too far off. I realize I don't even remember falling asleep, but clearly, I did.

"Did you have another night terror?" I ask, worried that something happened to him while I was asleep.

"No, no," he quickly replies. He runs a hand from the top of my shoulder down my arm, his hand hooking around my elbow. "I dreamed of you actually. And then I thought you coming here tonight was a part of that dream so I woke up to see if it was real. You really came for me."

"Of course, I did Josh." I lightly skim my fingers over his cheek, his stubble pricking at the pads of my fingers. "I'll always come for you."

He gazes straight into my eyes. "I didn't dream what you told me right?" Hope shines bright in his eyes, hope and—and love.

"I love you, Josh." I smile as I say it, watching as the words sink in, watching as his pupils dilate.

"No one's ever said that to me before," he whispers to me, his lips barely moving with the words.

"I've never said it to anyone before."

"What?" His body goes slack. "You never told Mason?"

"Never," I tell him firmly. "I should've known when I didn't fully feel it back that it was you, Josh." I slip my fingers into his hair at the nape of his neck and gently trail my nails over his scalp.

Josh lets out a contented hum. "I'm truly the only person you've felt this way for?"

"It's only you Josh." I stare deep into his green eyes, my smile growing further across my face. Pure joy spreads through me as I see Josh start to believe that I love him.

He pushes himself forward until our foreheads are touching. "God, Rena," he starts, his chest rising and falling rapidly in a rushed breath. "I'm so scared to say it."

I shake my head against his. "You don't have to say it, Josh. You don't have to say anything to me at all."

"But I want to," he says in a hurry. His eyes search mine desperately. "I feel it, Rena. You're with me everywhere. All I can think about is you. When I found out I got the job and my future was set I felt like shit because I didn't have you to share it with. All of it means nothing if I don't have you there with me."

I suck in a tight breath, my heart swelling with his words. "You have me, Josh. For everything that happens next you have me."

"What's going to happen when you go abroad?" he questions, concern filling his voice.

I close my eyes at the thought. "I'm willing to do whatever it takes. I don't leave until February so we still have time."

He nods. "My job is only an hour away so when you do come back for your last year I won't be too far away." His eyes meet mine with an apprehensive glint in them. "Maybe I could visit you during spring break or something. If you'd like—"

I bolt upright. "I would love that Josh. That would be amazing."

He sits up with me, his hand reaching for mine and lacing our fingers together. "Yeah?"