"I want to give you all the love you deserve."
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Hadley Carter has struggled with her sexuality ever since childhood. She keeps her feelings hidden out of fear of judgement and not being accepted by oth...
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"It's weird being back here," I admit as I survey Devon's room. Looking around, I recall the last time I'd been here, thinking back to how it felt to wake up in a foreign place with a pounding head and no recollection as to where I was or whose clothes I was wearing. The memory is somewhat humorous now.
"Surprised you agreed to come over," Devon teases. She takes a seat on her bed and crosses her legs as she gazes at me. "You know, after the way you left last time."
I shoot Devon a pointed look that makes her laugh. Technically, this would be the first time the two of us have ever hung out alone after expressing our feelings. My mother thinks I'm out with Delaney. Devon's mom is a nurse, and today she has an afternoon shift at the hospital. Devon and I are left alone at her house—alone in her bedroom. My heart does somersaults when I come to this realization. Butterflies flap around crazily in the pit of my stomach.
I take a seat next to Devon. The two of us sit in silence, drinking in the other's presence. Devon soon slides closer to me, gently running her fingertips over my kneecap. I close my eyes for a moment to take in the feeling of her touch and the warmth of her skin against mine.
"Can I make something clear?" Devon sits up straighter as she faces me.
Intrigued, I ask, "Yeah?"
"I like you, Hadley," Devon blurts. "A lot. If I'm being honest, I've had a crush on you for years. Since freshman year, back when we were in the same math class. I doubt you remember because I always sat in the back while you were up front with your friend Grace, I think her name is? Anyway, my friends have been pushing me to ask you out for so long now, and—"
"Your friends knew you liked me?" I interrupt. This revelation probably shouldn't take me too much by surprise, considering the conversation I had with Mason recently. She had more or less hinted that Devon had feelings for me. Yet it's still hard for me to believe someone like Devon Parker could possibly be interested in someone as average as me. The thought of Devon talking to her friends about me fills me with nervous excitement. Giddiness rushes through my veins and clouds my mind.
Devon's cheeks tinge a light shade of pink. "Well, yeah," she admits. "Why else did you think Kai would ask me that stupid question about who I would kiss at the party? My friends knew I wouldn't pick any of them. He just wanted to get me to say you."
"If we're getting everything off our chests . . ." I trail off and brave a smile. "I like you too, Devon. A lot."
"So," she starts, "have you ever been with a girl before? Or . . .?"
I think for a moment before I nod. "I have, actually."
Devon seems surprised, though she is quick to play this off. Regaining her composure by pulling on a poker face, Devon questions, "Can I ask you about it?"
I shrug. "Go for it. I don't think I've ever actually talked about it—her—before."
"Do you want to?" Devon inquires. She studies me closely.
