Dust to Dust

10

I got zero sleep that night. Which was okay since I was used to pulling all nighters, but this one was just out of pure fear, making it feel so much worse. Usually they happened only because of rushing thoughts, and my inability to relax, but this was way different. I never had a problem with sweating at night, but it apparently happened when I was nervous, and who could not be nervous after that? I was going to have to accept that sleep wasn't going to come easy to me in this place, much like back at home. It was annoying, but better than nothing at all.

Someday I would have to talk to Asher about what happened, because whoever that adherent was, came off very harsh. Better yet, talking to Jasper about it would be more reasonable. Clearly Asher supported the adherents being so stern, so he wouldn't be the right person to talk to. Jasper was an easy guy to talk to, if he knew it was serious, he wouldn't proceed to be a dick and just be respectful, even if it wasn't going to last long. That was all I really needed.

While I would much rather confront Asher about it to his face, I really didn't have much to say other than expressing my insecurity about the adherents. But I guess they were just doing their job, they supported Asher, and wanted to make sure he was getting everything done properly. I just wish I knew exactly what he was doing. Worshipping sure, but what the hell did he need a bunch of dead animals for? It really freaked me out, and while I wanted to respect what he believed in, this was a step too far for my liking.

As the cabin got slightly brighter, I started to process that it was morning, and I wasn't going to sleep at all. Delilah was the first to start shifting, and sat up in her bed. Even though I really hadn't slept at all, I was flat out exhausted. But I wanted to talk to her so badly about what was going on. Her whole personality had changed within just one night, and I couldn't help but worry. Whatever happened, I doubted it was because of sudden past memories. It would make some sort of sense, but I had a really bad feeling about whatever was going on with her. She had come back from the church without explaining what Asher had really talked to her about, because they had only spoken briefly, and whatever he said must be the reason for her drop in positive energy. Delilah was such a carefree and optimistic person from what I had seen, so seeing her suddenly feel the need to hide things was concerning.

The itch to speak was growing far too quickly, so I finally got up and looked at Delilah from across the room. She was surprised that I had been awake for this long. "Jenny? Are you okay?"

She was asking the wrong person.

I didn't say anything and got out of bed, walking over to Delilah's. I sat next to her with a serious look on my face, to show her that I knew something was up. Now that I was closer, it became obvious that she actually hadn't slept well either. Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy, and she had that same faint twitching from the night before. "Oh, god. Delilah..." I couldn't find the right words at the moment. She clearly wasn't going to talk so easily, otherwise she would have explained already. My mind was racing and she just couldn't figure out why. I wanted to tell myself that I was overthinking again, like I always did. But this was bothering me so much, and even if it wasn't a big deal, then that was my problem. If there was something wrong with Delilah, then I wanted to know.

She just laughed at herself, failing miserably at hiding the urge to cry coming back up her throat. "Is it bad? Sorry, I had a pretty rough night, and..." her voice shook, so she stopped to try harder at containing herself. "I'm sorry.. I guess I just..."

I leaned closer to her to show that she wasn't alone, and whatever was going on, she could tell me about it. I wanted to know who on Earth could have hurt her so easily, and I had a pretty good idea of who. She couldn't hold herself back anymore and looked down at her knees, starting to cry. Her whole body was trembling either from fear or sadness, it was very unclear, but either way, it was so painful to listen to.