His Fling, My Forever

•Chapter 43•

Elara Beck
Today was our day of looking round mum and baby groups for Frances and I.
I was probably more excited than I should have been but I couldn't help it.
I was excited to meet new friends, and friends who had babies and knew what I was going through.

Speaking of friends, Agnes hadn't even tried to apologise to me.
The last time I had seen her was when I had shut the door on her.
Both Shawn and I were disappointed in her.
But I was filled with sadness more than anything.
She went behind my back and I don't know if I could ever forgive her for that.

I pulled on Frances' white baby leggings and a pink top, and laughed at myself as I had purposefully put her in a similar outfit to me.
But when it came to socks and shoes Frances was not having it.
"Frances Beck Mendes I swear I will take Heffalump away!" I warned, referencing to her purple and blue elephant that she carried round everywhere.
"Lumpy!" She yelled back and continued to thrash around.
"Shawn!" I yelled and he sauntered in while rolling his eyes.
He smiled and picked Frances up, holding her tight enough for me to put on her frilly socks and clip her shoes on.
I looked up at my daughter who let out the loudest laugh, as she did whenever she had tried to battle me.
As I slipped on her pink puffer coat and put on my own long pink coat Shawn pouted.
"I didn't get the pink and white memo." He said and I giggled before pressing a kiss to his lips.
"Im sorry baby."
"It's ok. My girls look beautiful." He said and swung Frances into his arms.
He held onto my hand as we walked out to the car and I felt that it was going to be a good day.

In the car I played one of Shawn's songs and Frances bopped her head and swung her legs around.
"Baby who's singing?" I said and Shawn scoffed.
"She doesn't know what I sound like!"
"Frances who's singing?"
"Daddy." She giggled and Shawn's eyes widened.
Little did he know I played some of his songs for her when he was out prepping for tour.
"Do you like it?" Shawn asked and Frances clapped her hands along with the beat and looked out of the window.
"She's very musical. She claps along to beats very easily and can mumble to melodies." I said and I watched as a discrete grin appeared on his face.
"Good."

The morning was filled with disappointment.
None of us liked the baby groups we looked in on, and Frances spent the whole time cowering behind my legs.
"I don't know what to do." I sighed and Shawn placed his hand on mine as we sat in a small cafe.
"Don't give up ok? We still have one more to look at today." He said and I nodded.
"Frances do you like the group?" I said, knowing she would only partially understand.
She shook her head and continued to pull apart her mini blueberry muffin.
"She'll like somewhere. She'll feel comfortable enough to go and play." Shawn said and I managed to force a half smile.
"I don't want her to be shy like me. I was overly shy as a child and I just want her to be able to play with other children." I pouted.
"Elara she's barely eighteen months old. This is the first time she'll have seen all of this and been around other children. Everything will be ok I promise. Besides, it's only a baby group it's not even preschool."
"I know. But I guess it's partially for me as well. I'll need people when you're gone."

The thought of Shawn going was still a thought that sent a wave of anxiety down my spine.
I knew it wasn't forever but I worried about doing this on my own, especially now I didn't have Agnes.
I couldn't go to my parents house.
I would have to do it alone.

As we walked up to the large brick reception building and I read 'Rosehill Playgroup' a flutter went through my heart.
I looked at Shawn and saw that he had a smile on his face similar to mine, even Frances had clambered down from his arms and was walking on her own.

We were met at the door by a younger girl with a wide smile on her face.
"Hi!" She beamed and I immediately smiled more.
"Hey." I sighed and Shawn stood by me, wrapping his arm around my waist.
"It's so lovely to meet you! So I'm Annie and I'll be staying with you for today." She said and shook mine and Shawn's hands. "And who is this?" She said getting onto her knees infront of Frances.
Frances looked up at me and I nodded.
"Hi." Frances said and gently took Annie's hand in her own.
"This is Frances." I said and Annie smiled.
"Hello Frances." She smiled and Frances came to stand back with Shawn and I. "So is it just mum and baby or are we expecting you as well Mr Mendes?" She said and stood back up.
"Just Elara and Frances while I'm away." He said and Annie nodded.
"Shall we go and explore?"

The place was beautiful and I felt so at home.
They had different classes that Frances and I could attend including, colouring, group singing, gardening, chat time, and they had endless facilities for playing.
It was more than I had seen at any other playgroup and I knew it would be so good to stimulate Frances brain and it would be good to keep me distracted from missing Shawn.

We entered a brightly coloured room and a group of children were sat either watching the film, asleep, or fiddling with something while the mothers sat and talked over a cup of coffee on another table.

I went to look down at Frances but was surprised to see her crawling towards the group of children.
She sat very close beside a little boy and I couldn't help but smile at her.
The two of them sat and stared at the screen in front of them and I looked at Shawn who wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me tight.
"This is it." He whispered and I nodded.
"I love it."
"I love you. Both of you." He whispered and I glanced quickly at some of the other mothers who were looking at us endearingly, one with a hand on her chest and I felt myself blush.
"And we love you too. So much."