All of Your Life

Dinner with Mom

The surgery was successful, but ran a little longer than they thought with a few complications; Meredith, Amy and Derek were in the scrub room, scrubbing out. "You did a good job in there Dr. Shepherd," Meredith told Amy.

"Thank you for letting me scrub in, Dr. Grey," Amy said to her resident, knowing that Derek would have never let her scrub in on such a rare procedure, him not wanting to play favouritism.

"Well, you said that you were interested in neuro, Dr. Shepherd, and in your file I noticed you needed the experience, so I thought you might like this chance to scrub in on a rare procedure."
"I did thank you Dr. Grey."

"My pleasure, I am aware how important it is to teach someone who is interested, I had a wonderful teacher myself when I was intern," said Meredith, shooting a quick look over at Derek, before focusing back on her hands. Amy didn't miss the look that Meredith threw at her brother.

"I know, Dr. Grey," Amy said with a smile.

"Dr. Shepherd, are you on call tonight?" Meredith asked her, not missing the day when she had to spend the night at the hospital.

"I am, Dr. Grey," Amy informed her, knowing if she wasn't already on call, would have gladly offered to stay.

"I want you to personally monitor Mrs. Carter overnight, she shouldn't wake until morning, I will inform Dr. Kripke; but Mrs. Carter is your priority, Dr. Shepherd. Please finish up her post op and I will see you in the morning."

"Yes, Dr. Grey," said Amy, before turning to leave.

"Ames," Derek called her name before she was able to walk out of the room.

"Yes?"

"Are you planning to see mom this visit?" Derek questioned, already knowing the answer.

"Why don't you ask her if she planning to see me, Derek? Enjoy your dinner with Addison and Mark tonight," Amy threw at her brother before leaving the scrub room, slamming the door on the way out.

"Dr Shepherd, if you need to go I can finish up" Meredith told him, hoping he took her up on the offer.

"It fine Dr. Grey, I have already inform my mother and Dr. Sloan that I will be late for dinner," said Derek, Meredith noticed that he never mentioned Addison.

"What will your wife have to say about that?" she questioned, reminding herself he was married.

"Let's just say she isn't very happy."

"Somehow I am not surprised," Meredith said, trying her hardest not to glance at him, Derek had noticed over the past few weeks that whenever he mentioned Addison, Meredith avoided looking at him.

"Addie had a few choice words to say," he uttered, watching her closely as she dried her hands. "Would you like to get a drink with me sometime?" Derek blurted out.

"I don't think that'd be a good idea Dr. Shepherd."

"Meredith, I can't explain it but there is something between us..."

"Dr. Shepherd, you are married...and besides, I'm seeing someone," Meredith informed him. She panicked when he said the those words to her, her heart screamed to say yes, but she did the only thing she could she lied, before bolting out of the scrub room.

Derek sighed to himself, he noticed that Meredith never let anything personal out in front of him. He knew that she was keeping something from him, and he just wished that he could remember something, he knew that he was attracted Meredith, but something told him there was a lot more to it than that he felt like. He felt like he knew her, but he couldn't remember hardly anything before his accident.

The last thing he could remember was being in New York, and then waking up in Seattle, but Seattle seemed familiar to him. Meredith seemed even more familiar to him, he wanted answers but he knew Meredith wouldn't give them to him; as she spent most of her time avoiding him. Derek knew he needed to forget Meredith and focus on Addison, but he didn't trust her, and he didn't know why, people were keeping things from him, he knew that, he needed to figure out why.

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Derek pulled up outside the restaurant only 30 minutes late, he knew Addison would have something to say when they got home but he just didn't care, Derek knew that if his mom wasn't joining them: he wouldn't have bothered, he would have used work as an excuse. He walked into the restaurant and was shown over to where they were sitting by the maitre'd.

"Sir, what would you like to drink?"

"Double scotch single malt, please," Derek said before pulling his mom in for a hug and pressing a kiss to her cheek. "I missed you mom," he told her

"You have a funny way of showing it."

"I am sorry mom, things have been... busy."

"So Mark and Addison have been telling me," said Carolyn trying not to upset her son, he wasn't the Derek she knew; he was different since his accident, and it worried her that she didn't know her son anymore. She had hoped that him and Addison would repair their marriage but she had no idea what happened between them before he left New York for Seattle, and if it wasn't for Addison calling her two months later to let her know where he was, her son would still be lost to her.

"Amy sends you her love."

"Then where is she?" she asked, knowing her youngest daughter wouldn't have sent her love. Amy had always been different to the rest of her children she had taken her father's death very hard, and she had never been able to reach her.

"Ames is on call tonight, looking after a patient that me and Mer-Dr. Grey operated on today. Have you decided what you are having yet mom?" questioned Derek quickly not noticing the look that his mom gave Addison which made Addison feel rather uncomfortable.

"Yes, I have."

The rest of the evening, Derek spent talking to his mother catching her up on everything with Amy and Josh, barely noticing his wife or Mark for that matter, the whole evening he could imagine introducing Meredith to his mom and sisters. At the end of the evening, Derek offered to drive his mom back to the hotel, and letting Mark driving Addison back to their house, Derek quickly gave his wife a kiss on the cheek, before leaving the restaurant with his mother, once they got in the car, Carolyn quickly asked her son, what was going on with him and Addison.

"I don't know mom; but I think she is keeping something from me."

"Like what?"

"I don't know...but I feel like every I know now is a lie."

"Derek...you lost your memory, it is understandable that you are confused."

"It not that ma... I can't explain it; I love Addison I do; but I feel like there is something more out there for me."

"What do you mean Derek?"

"I always wanted what you and dad had, I know I don't have that Addison, but I feel like I could possibly have it with someone else," he sighed.

"Who?"

"Mom, I love you but please let me figure it out..."

"Derek, I love you. You're my only son and I want you to be happy," Carolyn told him.

"Thanks mom...you should know that Amy is," said Derek, trying to get his mom to talk to his sister.

"Good, I am glad she is, and I am glad that she has you and Addison."

"Mom, you know she hates Addison, she always has."

"I know but they both want what is best for you."

"I know mom," he breathed, trying to placate his mother, he knew Amy wanted the best for him, but Addison he wasn't sure, he was aware there was a closeness between Addison and Mark that was never there before the accident. After dropping his mother off at the hotel, he headed toward Joe's, not quite ready to go home just yet.