All of Your Life

Trust issues

Meredith was beyond relieved when her 48 hour shirt was over. All she wanted to do was get home and hold her little girl. She'd had spent the last 24 hours, keeping herself busy so not to think about her talk with Amy and, that she'd admitted to her boyfriend's sister that she was having doubts. She prayed that Amy wouldn't mention their talk to Derek. Meredith knew that Derek loved her, and she was even aware how silly she was being but it didn't stop the feeling of dread at losing him to Addison again, not when she already had, not once but twice. She knew that her feelings of jealously was ridiculous because of the accident, and her guilt at knowing that the accident was partly her fault. If she didn't run, he never would have followed her.

Flashback

Meredith was exhausted. She had a long day at the hospital, and at four months pregnant, it felt even longer. It'd been two months since she left Seattle and all she wanted was to crawl into her bed, at her apartment, imagining that she had Derek's arms wrapped around her, his hand resting on her stomach, which housed their child. God, she missed him.

This didn't explain why she was out with one of her fellow interns on a date, when she wasn't interested in the slightest. How did she get herself into these situations? Dating, and sleeping with her attending was one thing, but she loved with him with all of her heart. The only man she ever loved. She knew as soon as she said yes, it was a mistake but she talked herself into it. Since her departure from Seattle, she hadn't spoken to Cristina or Alex, only checking in with Izzie twice.

She was trying to focus on what Nathan was saying to her but she couldn't even pretend to be interested. Meredith was just about to say something when her cell rang. Quickly grabbing it out of her bag, she didn't bother even looking at the caller ID before answering it.

"Hello?" she said.

"Meredith, it Addison," responded the caller, pausing on the other end of the line. The voice Meredith had hoped to never hear again.

"Addison, how did you get hold of my..."

"That doesn't matter. I'm calling because of Derek."

"What you want to rub it in that..." Meredith started, actually kind of grateful for the interruption.

"God, no, Meredith. I know you hate me, and I don't blame you. But, Derek was in a car accident a couple of months ago, and he has been in a coma ever since. I thought you might want to know."

Meredith hand instinctively went to her stomach where their daughter was growing. "W-why?"

"Meredith, I know we hurt you but i think you are his only hope. I'm hoping he'll respond to you. I know how much he loved you."

"Addis...."

"Please Meredith. I know you don't owe me anything. When he wakes up I will step aside, I just want him alive. I love him enough to let him go. Please, Meredith?" She never thought that she would hear Addison Forbes Montgomery-Shepherd beg. She closed her eyes, knowing that she needed to see him.

"Okay."

"Thank you so much."

"Where is he?"

"He was taken to Mercy West, and they're not transferring on at the moment," said Addison. She was really glad she didn't have to face her friends.

"Okay, i will be there the day after tomorrow. And Addison..."

"What?"

"Thank you," Meredith breathed, hanging up. She took a deep breath before turning back to Nathan. "I'm sorry Nathan, but I really have to go. I had a good time tonight," she assured him. And, it was the truth but, nothing more as friends. Right now, she wanted to see Derek and know he was alright.