Just A Little Break

I CAN'T MIRANDA ...

"I lost..."

"You lost what?"

"I lost both of our babies Ben, well one....no both", she cried out falling to her knees because this was the first time Miranda said it out loud letting it become reality to her ears.

Ben didn't move at first because he was trying to wrap his mind around what Miranda just said.

Even though Miranda was crying hard to Ben the room was silent and everything was still almost as if the earth stopped spinning.

Ben still had no words and he still haven't processed what she said, but he got down on his knees and held Miranda tight as tears rolled down his face onto her back.

"What happened Miranda?", Ben finally said.

She pulled away and sat against the wall trying to catch her breath and stop crying, but she couldn't stop. Miranda never let herself feel the emotional pain from her first miscarriage and it was now hitting her like a boulder rolling down a hill realizing that there could've been a chance with the second baby, but she couldn't bare to wait to find out. Miranda's chest felt heavy and she felt lightheaded and eventually passed out onto Ben's lap as he was sitting up against the wall with his legs extended.

He leaned his head back against the wall while rubbing Miranda's head and back. He was so hurt and angry, but needed to put his feelings aside to be there for her because now all of her crying made sense. She was slowly letting out what she had been holding in all this time. But he had so many questions running through his mind that was now giving him a migraine.

He picked Miranda up and placed her on the bed and just watched her sleep until she woke up.

About a few hours later Miranda slowly woke up grabbing her forehead because it was pounding.

"Ben", she called out into the dark room then felt his legs as he was laying the opposite way of her.

Ben always got behind her and cuddled her in situations like this and they always woke up holding one another, but this time was different Ben was upset and hurt and he haven't even hear the whole thing yet.

"Miranda?", Ben said getting up as he felt her move in the bed.

"Yes?"

"Tell me what happened", he said with a serious look on his face sitting up all the way.

She took a deep breath. "A year ago I was pregnant with our baby." Tears started rolling down Miranda's face. "And I was really excited and happy for us I couldn't wait to tell you", she said wiping her face.

Ben's jaw was steady grinding with no facial expressions just yet.

"Me and Tucker tried our entire marriage trying to get pregnant, but nothing never happened not even a missed cycle. Then I find you and here you come into my life with nothing but love and more being everything that I need and want. We had so much sex I figured that after the first two years, then maybe it must be true that I can't get pregnant. Until I missed 3 cycles. It was a lot going on those 3 months and I just didn't even realize that I was that late until I was having really bad cramps one day during surgery. That's when I realized I haven't had a cycle in a while. After surgery I went to put on a pad because I figured it was coming soon, but it never did and then the following week I threw up everything even water. That's when I told you I ate something that a patient's family brought in. The morning sickness went away quick, but the mood swings and hormones were insane. My first Doctors appointment I was told I was 3 months almost 4 months pregnant and to start switching everything over forwards starting my prenatal care. I was so happy Ben you have to know I really wanted her, both of them."