Juvie Girl Has A Daughter?

chapter 4

"Look what the wind blew in. "

"I don't think that's a phrase. "

"What are you doing here Tania? I thought there was a federal agent here to see me. "

"I am a federal agent. "

"What's it like on the other side of the table?"

"I'm not here for small talk. I'm here because my shrink thinks that i will feel better if I forgive you for all that you've done to me. I don't think so but here I am. "

"Am I forgiven? "

"Let me tell you something. I was 9 when my mother died and My father  wasn't around. Instead all I had was you. I needed you to comfort me and tell me that it was ok, that it going to get better, but you didn't. Instead you caused pain, which lead a series of events that got me locked up. I have gone through things that no 9 year old should go through. "

"What's the point of you telling me things I already know? "

"I'm telling you this because I don't really think you understand the severity of the thing you have done. But aside from that I'm not here to forgive you. I'm here to thank you."

"You're very most welcome. I know I very much enjoyed it. " He smirks at me. I ignore him and go on with my story.

"I got pregnant at 18.  Oh did you know that I had a daughter. Yea, she's 9 now. And I couldn't possibly think about doing the things that you've done to me, or let someone do that to her. "

"Mother of the year. " He mutters. I, again, ignore him.

"I still went to college. I got married at 21, graduated college and became a cop. Then I went on to become a detective. That was my goal. I wanted to find  the sons of bitches who are just like you. Then my wife got shot and I couldn't handle it. So I went to Quantico for six months to go into the FBI. Best decision of my life. I wanted to catch people like the ones that killed my wife. "

"I'm no killer. "

"You almost were though. Do you ever think back to that day? "

"What day? "

"The day you almost killed your own son. "

"He wasn't supposed to be driving that car. "

"You can't blame him for wanting to drive a Bugatti. Imagine it. All you wanted to do was drive your sisters Bugatti. The one you bought for her. You ask her if you can drive it. She gives the keys and tells you to knock yourself out. You didn't do anything wrong. You were just driving to work when your car gets flipped. A short 2 to 3 months later, you find out your father is a monster. That he did all of these horrible things to your sister. That he was in fact the person who caused the accident that put you in a coma. You watch him sit in a courtroom with no remorse for anything that he did. So you find yourself asking this question. Did I ever really know this stranger I call my dad. I mean you even invited this person into your home where he assaulted your sister when you weren't there. "

"You took away my son. " He grits out.

"No, you did that. All by yourself. "

"You took away my son! " He tells and slams his fist on the table.

"Like how you took away my childhood!? My childhood was stolen from me! I didn't get to live the rest of my childhood in happiness! Instead I lived my childhood getting beat, just because I was there! " My voice starts to crack and a tear spills over.

"I spent my childhood getting drunk just like the man who beat me everyday! I spend my childhood getting high just like the man who raped me! I spent my childhood in jail just like the men who ruined my life! You don't get to blame me for the the things that you did! I paid for all of my crimes! It's your turn now! "I yell, my face covered in tears. This is what I was afraid of. I was afraid of showing him how weak I really am.

" Don't pretend you had it worse than me after your mother died! You don't know what I went through! "He acusses me.

"I did have it worse than you! "I sob as I wipe my tears.

"You don't know what I went through! "He says again.

" Yes I do! My wife died four years ago! I was and still am so torn up about it and I never, never, laid a hand on my daughter! "I scream at him.

I want to bash his head in for making up excuses. I never realized how he felt after my mother died until now. I did go through it. I know exactly how he felt. But I will never use that as an excuse to hit my daughter.

All he does is stare at me. I am a mess and I am standing here letting him see me like this. The thing is that I don't care that he is starring at me. I almost want him to see me like this. I breath in and out then I wipe my face dry.

"You're worthless. "

"Im not going to sit here and listen to things I've heard before. "

"When I get out of here, I'm going to be your worst nightmare. "

"You wont even scratch the surface and as long as I am alive, the only way you will ever leave here is in a body bag. "

"Are you threatening me? "

"No. I won't kill you or have someone in here kill you. I making you a promise. I promise you that I will make sure that you stay in here for the rest of your pathetic life.I want you to remember all of the horrible things that you've done. And when you take that last dying breath, I want you to think about what my mother would think of you if she was here to witness all that you've done. "I growl. He doesn't say anything. I stand and tap on the door.

" You're a hypocrite. Have you ever thought about what your mother would think of you if she was here to witness all that you've done? "He uses my words against me.

" I have. Everyday while I was in juvie."

"She would've been so proud. " He says as the door opens.

"I hope you burn in hell Devin. " I said as I walked out. My Shrink was so wrong, this didn't make me feel better. If anything, it made me feel worse.