I'm Okay - Corpse Husband

I'm Okay [End]

He was silently staring at the curtains, hearing his friends sleep. His insomnia decided to kick in this night aswell, like almost every night, but for some reason, he had the expectation to manage to get some actual sleep tonight, after all of that.

He didn't.

Corpse was caged in with his thoughts, like almost every night but this time they were... different.

The classics ''You're not good enough'' ''Nobody cares about you'' ''You're worthless''

''You're alone''

Those thoughts did not appear into his head and he did not miss them. Even when he could feel them lurking in the back, he did not care. He simply didn't, not tonight at least.

But if that wasn't it... What was in his head? What was he thinking?

He couldn't really pinpoint what was going through his mind. He felt like he was falling down in the middle of nothing but he felt calm, like never before.

He focused on Rae and Poki's breathing, they were both profoundly sleeping. This night had been wild thanks to them, and he couldn't feel more thankful for having them.

Suddenly, a light ray came throught the window, through a small gap between the curtains that landed directly on him, brightening his face.

''What time is it?'' was his first thought. He knew it had to be morning already, but he couldn't really make up his mind about what was the specific hour. It could be 7 or 9 am for all he knew.

''Why did this light just appear now? the sun has been up for hours...'' He was questioning this but he could answer himself pretty quickly. ''It's probably a cloudy day, the sun must have gotten a clear moment just now''

He entertained himself on those thoughts till one well known one came rushing in.

''My mask! My face!''

He got startled but he stopped himself before he woke up either of the girls. Both of them just huffed a bit and reaccommodated themselves to continue sleeping. He took a quick second to calm himself before he started thinking about what to do.

They had technically seen his face by now... but not clearly, and that always kept him calmer. There was always something, either his mask or the pure darkness that stopped either of them from clearly seing him.

''Why does it matter?'' a calmer part of his head said. ''They are your friends, they won't care about how you look... they probably will like your face''

''How could they like something about myself that I hate?!'' ''What if they regret everything we did tonight after they see how I actually look?'' ''What if...?''

''They won't. You know they won't.''

He couldn't make up his mind, all he could think about was that every second he laid there, he was at risk of getting exposed. He was at risk of losing it all. 

He felt like his hearth was beating faster and he struggled to breath a bit more.

He felt like a panic attack was about to hit.

There was no way he could deal with that without waking up everyone and making a huge scene, which only made him panic even more. He quickly placed his hand on his chest on a desperate attempt to stop it, but he knew that was going to be worthless. There was nothing he could do to avoid it now.

Suddenly, he felt a warm sensation on his hand that grabbed it with a certain strenght and sweetness.

-Corpse? -Said Rae, with her eyes intentionally shut, worried by Corpse's state.

He didn't respond. He just stared at Rae's hand as he felt a wave of calmness hit him. He progressively grabbed Rae's hand strongerly as his breathing normalized.

He knew what was the answer to all his worries, he knew that all his struggles were not solved but he, for the first time, knew that he could face them. Or at least that he wanted to.

He felt happy now and nothing was going to take that away from him. Nothing else mattered.

Rae was feeling progressively more stressed at Corpse's lack of replies. She didn't wanted to open her eyes since she knew that she could probably fully see his face but he wasn't leaving her with many other options. She was starting to really get worried.

She leaned in closer to Corpse's face, wanting to whisper him anything that could calm him down when her nose poke with Corpse's. She was a bit setted aback since she noticed right with that that Corpse was a lot calmer. She heard his breathing right infront of her, knowing that Corpse was staring at her. 

Something about that told her that she could open her eyes, she felt it deep inside of her. Corpse wanted her to open her eyes, to finally see him.

She slowly opened them as she stared directly into Corpse's warm and beatiful eyes.

-Are you ok? -She said, softly, feeling a bit overwhelmed.

-I'm good.

End.