The 'Unwholesome' Hall Monitor!

Unexpected Hookup

Warning: there is slight sexual references. And smut. You've been warned. Also Kokichi x Mondo I guess?

TW: F slur + Not being able to write a character I'm not familiar with-

Point of View: Mondo Owada

I was wandering around school, looking at my phone. This dumb app. I couldn't seem to figure out how to communicate. Most the chats ended after I asked to get to know them. I'm guessing a lot of people really take 'you can hook up with others' to the next level. I didn't get the app to just fuck a dude then throw the condoms in the trash for another poor bitch to clean, I want someone to connect with. Tch, it makes me sound weak. Imagine hearing that from your local gang leader
'oh howdy hi, I just wanna date a guy'
Makes me sound stupid.

I asked Takemichi if people on this app actually date each other, and this little fucker responded with
"I'm unsure. You should ask my cousin."
Like BITCH you told me about the app!

I went to Chihiro too, asking about if he knew the app, since he's a cross dresser, and knowing he did, I asked if he knew if people actually dated, he responded with
"Unsure."
Well. All my friends are shit at advice.

Going to Leon (dear God how low I've sunken). I asked if he knew about Horu Hangout, and this fucking idiot responded with
"That fag app? Really Mondo? You think I have that?"
Oh this bastard

"It's not just for gay people Leon, it's for allies." I groaned.
"I still don't want it. I don't want to be mocked by people in this school."
"Leon, you buffoon, this school is surrounded by people who support this stuff."
"Yeah yeah but my baseball friends-"
"Hey Leon, for a guy so adamant for being straight, you sure having a thing for throwing around balls." I grinned after that
"Oh fuck off Mondo." Leon pouted, throwing the ball he had in his hand against the wall "I'm only here for the stupid talent."
"Oh poor you! Being part of the 1% of teens who's actually good at what they do!"
"Mondo I swear I'll cut you!" Leon smirked, the two of us probably looking likes douches with how much I was grinning and how much he was smirking.
"I mean Leon, I always see how you stare at guys' asses."
"Mondo! It's not gay to tell the homies they got cake." After that we both cackled, both heading off to class.

Well. My friends are a bunch of idiots. Who should I go to for stuff like hook ups?

Oh...

Oh no.

I walked over to hear a lot of clashing of metal and sounds of torches being blown into the air, entering to see both Miu and Kazuichi having a contest to see who's better at making a robot. Knowing these idiots it's probably for them to have sex with.
"Oi! Miu!"
"What do you want?!" Miu yelled, probably because of how loud Kazuichi was
"I just wanted to ask-"
"What? Wait a moment!" She punched Kazuichi
"Miu! What the hell that hurt!" The skittish man went to corner, curling up and hiding his eyes under his beanie. Poor guy
"What did you want you fucking man whore?"
"I wanted to ask an ExPeRt about hookups." I clicked the fingers together "so I thought going to a slut would be easy."
"Hang on! After you just insulted me, you expect me to help?"
"Yes." I slapped a vibrator into her hand "yes I do."
Miu looked at it and kinda grinned. "Well thanks for the gift but I can't help you with that either."
"What why?"
"I'm a virgin idiot."
I felt my mouth drop "W-what?!"
"You heard me you horny asshole, I am a VIRGIN!"
"You use that as an insult though!" I gritted my teeth "especially to Taka!"
"Oooh~ why do you care about Taka so much?" I felt my face turn blank. Oh dear
"Because he's a friend Miu!"
"Sure... well I still can't help." She slammed her glasses onto her face "sorry."
"Oh fuck you Miu." I marched out.

Well Nevermind it's not just my friends, Taka's friends are idiots too. Wait why do I keep thinking of him? Ugh!

When I got back to my house, I looked at the app. It wouldn't be bad if I just... had one night with someone... right..? Opening up anonymous chat, I was randomly matched with someone.

Hey hey!

What?

So mean~! I just came to check you out since we got paired and I get a meanie instead.
Boohoo I'm sad

...
What?

Doesn't matter. What you want from me?

I'm assuming we're... just hooking up... since you are on this app

Oh really...
Well we can meet up anywhere!
I wanna meet up with you kiiiiind stranger.
Pwetty pwease

This is the most persistent I've seen someone.
Okay fine. Where to.

Well. How about your biker gang base Mondo?

Wait wait wait. How do you know who I am?

Oh it is you!
That was a lie.
We can still meet up there.

What if I object?

You won't.

Ok that's fair.
But how can you tell it's me though

Oh you wanna know?
Well.
It's a secret.

Man you're kind of annoying.

I pride myself on that. See you all so 'mighty' gang leader

I really didn't want to go. But I've got a lot of pent up and... being honest, I'm way too horny to exist right now. I feel like I should've transcended into the universe's planet system due to spending 5 hours with a lot of lotion and a handkerchief.

Getting to my base, I sat there waiting. As I saw a tiny man with purple hair walk in
"Nee-heehee. So you showed up?"
"Of course I did, I mean I got a lot of things to get out!" I yelled slightly, the tiny man smirked slightly
"Angry eh~? Well I wouldn't say it's fair to yell at me?"
"Sorry. I'm just extremely nervous since I've... never hooked up with someone."
"Aw come on! Boring." He looked at me "maybe I can do all the work for you?~"
"Wait what?"

After that moment, the tiny boy and I went to my office and had our ways with each other, every breath taken from him got interrupted by my lips locking into his, the squelching sounds as I kept thrusting filled the room, his eyes were watering as well, we ended up with me leaning him on my desk, panting, my head dizzy

"Man Mondo~ this is such a fun game~!" He giggled out before moaning, I clung to him, beginning to pound deeper into him, and after a while of my head feeling light and me getting dizzy, both our backs fell to the desk, before I had anything to think about, I went out like a light bulb, slightly moaning

"Taka..."

Point of View: None

As the small boy lay there, a massive man piled on top of him, hearing him moan another man's name, he felt kind of sad. This was supposed to be a game right? Right?! He crawled out from under him, grabbing a tissue and cleaning himself out, before looking at his office, the floor being murky and disgusting.
"Well this was dissatisfying." He mumbled, throwing the tissue in the bin.
"Well. This'll be useful in the near future...

Sleep tight Mondo..."

•——•

1246 words!

Sorry if I got Kokichi's character out of focus, I'm not actually a fan of him. And sorry if the smut makes you uncomfortable, but it is part of the story. I hope you enjoyed this chapter!