The 'Unwholesome' Hall Monitor!

Hookups but are they?

"Hey... Mondo..." A little boy with raven hair and ruby eyes spoke to him
"Hm? Who are you?" Mondo looked at the kid, hiding his face in his hands
"Ah well... I just wanted to say... thank you for yesterday... you really helped me..."
"Ah well it's nothing. Those guys were putting needles into your sandwich. That's not right. You shouldn't thank me for doing something everyone should do."
"Here." The smaller boy gave him a small bear plush "I know that it's not much but... I just want you to have it!"
"Alright..? Thanks I guess..."
The small boy ran off, smiling to himself as young Mondo looked at the bear and smiled, hugging it.

Mondo awoke from his dream, it was the third one like that this month, and he turned to the bear on his shelf, looking at it with saddened eyes "dammit Hiro... I miss him..."

Trigger warning: Some Homophobia

Point of View: Mondo Owada

Just my luck!

After arguing with Kiyotaka and knowing how terrible Kokichi's dad is, I have to get grape hair a date, where he got it from Kiyotaka and Nagito. Fuck. I cannot win. Ever.

I walked out the bathroom and knocked on Kokichi's door "idiot, bathroom's free."
"Yeah yeah." Kokichi got up, scratching his hair and looking around "where's your brother."
"He's on a trip. Probably for more drugs."
"Ah drugs." He nodded "well. Bathroom, move."
"I just traded one brother for another FOR FUCKS SAKE."
I was making pancakes; drenching Kokichi's in syrup. He is going to enjoy this drowned victim.
"Hey big dick! Can I use your razor?"
"Sure but be careful! Mines stronger than a girls'!"
"Very funny Mondo."
"Heh." You're not the only gremlin here grapevine. I finished his pancake, and put salt on mine. Yes I'm a monster. Fight me.
"Big dick!"
"What piss boy?"
"Can I use your shampoo-and-conditioner?"
"Yeah. But if you use an entire HAND-FULL, I'll kill you."
"Oh and big dick."
"What."
"Wuv you." He giggled and I sighed
"Love you... I guess-"
"Also your brother is hot."
"KOKICHI!"

We were riding on my bike to school, and Kokichi wouldn't stop talking about that soldier girl.
"She was cute. What can I say?"
"Ok. Why not ask her out?"
"Neeheehee. Nah. I'm too fabulous for her."
"You sure? I could ask her for you."
"No. Please don't." He gripped my arm
"Alright. But don't get antsy when I put you up with a girl or guy you find hot."
"Ehhh."
"I've never asked, what are you into?"
"Well everyone says I'm gay-" he swung his legs back and forth, I shall kill this tiny man "-therefore I am."
"Okay. I feel like that's a lie. Please be honest."
"Eh alright. I'm Polysexual."
"Alright thank you. Much easier." Oh yeah. It's time to get F U N K Y.

When we were in school, I looked at all the ultimate classes and reserve course students. Who would be a good fit for my new tiny gremlin brother...
"Hey Mondo!" Chihiro spoke up
"Yeah Chihiro?"
"I wanted to know why're you staring at Mahiru. She just texted me you're freaking her out."
"Oh shit-" I looked at the displeased Mahiru shaking her head and her tiny goblin friend shaking her head. I yelled "SORRY!"
"Why are you so distracted?"
"I'm trying to get my friend a date."
"Kokichi?"
"How'd you know?"
"He calls you big dick." Chihiro shrugged his shoulders
"He says that at school?"
"Yeah but he means well. He seems to like you."
"Yeah. He's now my adoptive brother SOOO."
"Ah well. I have a list of people he'd be good with." He gave me a printed off piece of paper.
"Thanks Chihiro."
"Mondo~Kun~~~!" I turned to see a girl run over and hug me. It was Kanon
"Hey... Kanon..."
"I wanted to ask if you wanted to go on a date tomorrow..."
"Okay..." I kinda felt disgusted. She gives me an unnerved feeling.
"Alright see you the- my goodness that's disgusting." Both me and Chihiro turned to what she was pointed at, it was Kaede holding Sayaka's hand while Ibuki was singing loudly to them.
"What is..?" Chihiro asked
"Them! They're girls, why are they so touchy."
"Because they might be dating." Chihiro smiled, but Kanon gave a disgusted look.
"Gross. Chihiro, as a fellow girl, you understand that it's disgusting right?"
"Ah well... uhm..."
"Leave her alone." I spoke up, letting Chihiro not die from panic "and I don't think it's gross. If they love each other it shouldn't be a problem."
"Well it grosses me out." Kanon puffed her cheeks out. Yeah she's not being cute "I'm going to say something."
"No you're not." I picked her up, not letting her down
"Let me go!"
"Leave them alone. They're just enjoying life. Is it so bad?"
"Yes! It's... just wrong." I groaned, turning to Chihiro, before Leon came over, being as arrogant as ever.
"Leon! Take your damn cousin!" I spat out, putting Kanon next to Leon
"Why?"
"Because I caught Sayaka and Kaede holding hands! It's gross and WEIRD."
"Nah that's hot." Leon kinda looked over, checking out the three girls as Ibuki was cuddling up to the other "I would love to watch them have sex together. But two guys? That's gross."
"Leon!" I spoke up, slightly offended
"What? It's how I feel."
"Both of you just go. You're being weird."
"Alright. Come on Kanon, I got some merchandise to sell." Leon flipped me off as he and Kanon walked off
"Mondo... are you okay..?" Chihiro asked me, looking at me with innocent eyes
"Yeah I'm fine... just need to cool down..."