War Guilt [#Wattys2015]

Chapter Eighteen

"You're a soldier now. Fighting in a battle. To be free once more. Yeah that's worth fighting for..." - Bryan Adams and Hans Zimmer 2002

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Nova

It had been three days already and I hadn't achieved anything. There was no way I was going to be able to lead them all back to the base without them suspecting something wrong.

Why does Schmidt think I can do this?

Then I remembered my powers and the film that I had been shown. There was a way that I could get them all back there, but did I really want to do that? I had been spending a lot of time with Ryan lately and he keeps telling me about all these wonderful things that we'd done. I saved someone's life; even thought he died later on. I shook my head. I needed to get on with my mission.

I was walking the boundary of the base when I suddenly saw something flashing in a nearby bush. I suspiciously walked over to it, hands at the ready. As I got close I saw a shining metal container sitting in the middle of the bush. I grabbed it and examined it slowly until I saw the unmistakable Hydra emblem on it. It was for me. I looked back behind me and around me to make sure no one was close by then popped the lid off it. I suddenly fell to the ground in a heap as an electrical current surged through my body. It was a warning from Schmidt. I know knew what my punishment would be.

I lay on the ground until the electricity stopped surging through me. I didn't want to get up, let alone move at all. I sobbed quietly to myself, letting a few tears escape my eyes.

Why me?

I pulled myself together and got up, thinking about what I was going to do. I may not have known who I really was but I didn't want to be the person I became anymore. At first I would've done anything for Schmidt. But now...I just can't. But if I don't he will find me and punish me...

I suddenly heard some commotion back at the camp and decided to go and see what was going on. As I got closer, I noticed some new faces. One of them I recognised as a man known as Captain America. The other man standing next to him was Sergeant James Barnes along with the rest of the Howling Commandos. Schmidt had shown me photographs of them and told me to stay away from them. I stopped dead in my tracks, fearing that they would recognise me, and turned around to get away. Too late.

"Maria?" Someone asked as they ran up to me.

I dropped my shoulders and stood where I was, face to the ground as if I was trying to be invisible. They tapped my shoulder and I was quick to react, pulling their hand forwards. The rest of their body followed the motion and landed with a thud on the ground. I planted my knee on their chest, pinning their arms down with my hands. The man looked at me with fear in his eyes as my hands began to glow.

"Maria!" He yelled.

I snapped out of my comatose state and saw what I had done. I hopped off him quickly and walked away as fast as I could.

What have I done? What have I done?

For some reason I was used to being hurt when someone yelled at me. I don't remember who hurt me or why. I don't even know if it was a memory or just a thought.

"Maria!" The man yelled at me again.

Why am I Maria? I thought I was Nova.

I stopped walking without meaning to. The mans voice sounded so familiar to me. I guess that was a side effect of being wiped of your memory. Wait, how did I know that?...

Something at that point registered in my mind. I was starting to remember random things. It hurt my mind and I fell to the ground, clutching my head.

"What is wrong with me!?" I yelled.

"Calm down! Your ok, just calm down," he said as he knelt beside me.

I looked at him slowly, noticing that he was Barnes. He put his arm around me and I tensed up, not wanting him to touch me. I slithered away out of his grip and he looked at me with shock evident in his eyes.

"Are you ok? Have I done something wrong?" He asked with a pained voice.

I was still looking at him, my eyes blank. I recognised him but only from photos. But there was just something about him that made me feel warm inside.

What is this?

"Barnes?" I asked as if I remembered him.

"Yeah Maria, it's me," he replied pulling me into a hug.

I tensed again but soon relaxed into the compassionate act as I did with Ryan. This felt different though, the way he held me was different to the way Ryan did. I couldn't take it anymore. It was all too much. I didn't know what to believe or what to do, so I cried. I just cried.

"Shh, you're ok now. I'm here for you," Barnes whispered softly.

The Next Day

I sat in my bunker trying to make sense of everything that had been going on. I was a blank canvas that was being manipulated, but trying to figure out who the true manipulator was was the excruciating part. If my gut feeling was right and it happened to be Schmidt than all I had to do was tell someone and they would protect me, but if it were in fact the people who seem to be like family to me, the US Army, then I has no choice but to bring them back to the Hydra base.

I suddenly heard a ticking noise, like the one you would here before a timed bomb went off. It was very faint though which told me it weren't a bomb but something else. I listened carefully, trying to decipher where the small sound was coming from. Something caught my eye and directed my attention to my right arm. It had a small flashing light under my skin at the base of where my hand attached to the rest of my arm. I couldn't figure out what it was or why I had never seen it before when again I fell to the ground in a heap as an electrical current surged through my body. Schmidt was monitoring me, making sure I do what I was told.

Rage clouded my mind and I decided on what I was going to do. I had to complete this mission for Schmidt. It was the US Army's fault that I'm now like this and in this situation. They're the ones who made us do that supposed invasion of the Hydra Base. I was left there, no one came back for me. So I was going to start with Captain America and his Howling Commandos; just like Schmidt wanted.