Always Him (Always #1)

Prologue

"Sadie Rose Newman has graduated!" Blaine screamed to the skies as he spun around to face me. "My baby sister is graduated now, and we are so proud, aren't we, Jas?"

At my side, Jasper grinned widely, agreeing with my brother. "We are indeed! And we get to help her celebrate! What could be better?"

I laughed. "Maybe if I could already have my college degree in my hands."

Jasper put a hand on my shoulder. "One step at a time, Sades, no need to rush. Enjoy your time away from school while you can. You'll get that degree one day."

Blaine walked up to us, smirking. "Listen to Jasper, Sades. He speaks the truth here."

I walked away from them and down the river trail. They followed behind me, whispering between themselves.

A tree came into view, and I darted toward it, leaping into the air to cling to the branch hanging over the path. It was a sturdy enough branch that I was able to heave myself up and climb over it, so I was straddling it. Jasper and Blaine were so caught up in their conversation that they had continued to walk on, not noting I was no longer in front of them.

They made it a good way down the path before they came to a sudden halt. I held in my laughter at their faces as they went in circles trying to find me. But I could no longer hold in my laughter as they started to call out my name, and as the night was creeping steadily toward us, I decided it wasn't in anyone's best interest to scare them and give them heart attacks at such a young age.

My laughter had them sprinting back down the path until they were below my branch. Blaine put his hands on his hips as he stared up at me. "How?"

Jasper came up behind him. "When?"

Their questions only made me laugh harder.

"Sades?" Blaine asked, a growing smile on his face. "It's not nice to scare us."

"Eh," I said as my laughter died down. "It's my graduation day, and I'm allowed to do what I want."

"That's a birthday. This is different. This is when you do things for the first time."

"Fine, catch me," I told them as I swung my leg over and let gravity do its thing.

Jasper caught me bridal style, and I wrapped my arms around his neck as I leaned back to grin at my brother. "This is a first."

Blaine crossed his arms. "You've jumped out of trees before."

I returned my attention to Jasper, who still held me tightly, a grin on his face as he readjusted his hold, bringing me up higher. He began to walk, Blaine walking next to us as we continued our walk down the trail.

"That's true," I admitted. "But this is the first time Jas has caught me without dropping me."

Jasper rolled his eyes. "That was one time, Sades, one time."

"I have a forever bruise because of it, Jas. I won't let you forget that one."

Blaine ran ahead, kicking rocks into the river.

It was then that I decided I'd treasure this memory for the rest of my life—the night of my high school graduation. Full of firsts, and what I wouldn't find out until later was that it was also full of lasts.

With me graduating, that could only mean that our free time together would come to an end or just wouldn't be as frequent. Blaine and Jasper were my best friends, I couldn't imagine a day without seeing them, laughing with them, but the adult world was calling our names.

Blaine had already begun taking classes at the community college for design. Jasper had done the same thing I had and took college classes in high school and had already managed to get to his sophomore year at the nearby university for medical engineering. They both would work together, coming up with different designs and processes to improve various medical equipment.

And come the fall, I would be attending the university as well. For pharmaceuticals, thanks to Carly, who'd given me a glowing recommendation. All of her colleagues were anticipating my schooling and internship to the point they'd almost asked if I could work with them while I was still in high school, though my mother put an immediate stop to that. She'd told them that my education came first, work would come later, and after a while, they backed off though Carly would tell me they asked for updates on me every week.

Jasper noticed me going quiet in his arms. "What are you thinking about?"

"I'm trying to freeze things with my mind," I said after a minute. "I don't want things to change."

"Things are made to change." He kept his eyes ahead on Blaine, who'd finally stopped kicking rocks and waited for us to catch up to him. "That's a part of life."

"I know." I clasped my fingers tighter around his neck. "I know that it is, but I just don't want things between the three of us to change."

"Why would they change?"

Darkness had finally finished cloaking us, and it was only by the moon and the stars in the sky that we were able to see, that and we all knew the trail like it was the back of our hand. I watched as the stars sparkled in the sky, trying to decide how to best phrase my answer to Jas' question.

"I've graduated now," I said slowly. "In the fall, I'll be going to school just like you and Blaine are. We're going to all be busy with schoolwork and internships; I don't see how we'll be able to hang out like we've been doing."

"Ah," Jasper said just as Blaine rejoined us. "We'll figure it out, Sades. No matter what happens, we'll always be friends. We'll always find time for each other."

Blaine looked confused at what Jasper had said, but the two of them shared a look that had the look on Blaine's face change to one of understanding. He only nodded his head now.

"The three amigos. The three musketeers." Blaine mused, winking at us. "That won't change except for a minor detail or two."

"Such as?" I pressed.

The look on my brother's face as he cracked his knuckles could only mean mischief was brewing inside his head. He opened his mouth but quickly closed it with a laugh. He pointed at Jasper. "The look on your face."

I turned to Jasper, trying to read his face but found nothing unusual on it before turning back to my brother. It had sounded kind of like a taunt the way Blaine was talking to Jasper as if they knew something that I didn't. Perhaps it had to do with what they were talking about earlier before I climbed onto the tree.

"You guys are idiots." I managed to breathe out, resting my head in the crook of Jasper's neck, closing my eyes. "But you're my idiots. Always my idiots."

Blaine barked out a laugh, as did Jasper. Neither tried to deny my words, though; they knew it was true just as they knew it'd always last, always be this way.

Long into the night, we laughed and talked.

Just over two and half months later, I'd give anything to go back to that night and relive it. I had no clue then just how special that night had been to me, how it'd be the last time the three of us would walk that trail together, had no idea just how much pain I'd feel as I remembered that night.

Because two and a half months after that night, Blaine would never laugh again; he would never call me Sades again, would never mock Jasper for something I still didn't know yet. It would be my last night of celebration with my brother.

The next celebration we would have wouldn't be much of a celebration. It was called a celebration of life, but that was just a happy way to say funeral.

I had no idea then that Blaine's funeral would be the next time everyone would be together. And for more than one reason, I wished I could go back in time. But I couldn't, and this was my life now.

As Jasper held me the night we found out, as I held him, we both cried for Blaine. We cried for what was gone.

The three musketeers were no more.

The two musketeers just didn't have the same ring to it. Nothing would ever have the same ring to it.

Nothing would bring my brother back no matter how hard I asked.

My brother was gone, and I missed him.