The First One- newt x reader

13~ Stay.

I had stopped hitting my head against the tree when I heard his voice- it was huskier than normal but that was just because I had woken him up in the middle of the night, and I found it so soothing to hear his voice like that so I stopped. He edged closer to me in an attempt to calm me down. Any other time this would have worked but I was terrified right now. Everything just felt so sensitive and I was even scared that the people I would trust with my life would hurt me. I trembled even more as he got closer and then he stroked my head which made me wince and cower back into the far end of the hammock.

"y/n why won't you let me touch you?" He seemed truly hurt that I wouldn't let him, as if he thought it was his fault.

"I-I-It's not y-you, I promise. I j-just don't think I can be touched by s-someone else right now." I managed to choke out in between sobs. He looked upset to hear me say that- well upset may be an understatement. 

I didn't want Newt to feel like it was his fault but I was honestly so terrified. I kept having the image of me being abused flashed into my mind every time I blinked. I desperately rubbed at my eyes to erase the horrors but it just wouldn't work. I needed Newt to hug me right now, "N-Newt?"

"Yeah?"

"Could I please l-lay with you?" I knew he wouldn't hurt me and I really just needed to cry into his warm chest and breathe in his calming scent. "Of course, come here y/n/n." He instructed as he held out a hand to me. 

Come on y/n this is Newt, he isn't like them people you saw. 

I built up some courage and accepted his hand. He then led me over to his hammock and we both lay in it together, my head in his chest and his muscular arms wrapped around me letting me know he would always protect me. My tears we just seeping into his shirt, staining it with every new droplet that came from my eyes. I tried to stop the shaking and the tears but I couldn't when I still saw that.

With every passing minute that I lay with Newt, the image started to fade a little from my mind. I felt much safer in his arms and I am so beyond grateful that he understood I wasn't exactly in the shape to talk yet. The blonde boy just let me stay in his arms for as long as I needed, and I was so thankful.

--time skip to a little before sunrise--

I hadn't gotten any sleep after the nightmare- Newt and I were together in his hammock all night in silence, it was a comfortable silence though because we were listening to the peaceful whistle of the cool breeze against the grass and to each others breathing. 

"Well, suppose I better go wake Alby and Minho up so we can go explore." Newt whispered, I didn't want to be left alone today though. 

I couldn't leave his arms all night and now he wanted to leave to go see god knows what beyond those walls? He can't leave me here alone, I know I was all up for it yesterday but after last night there is NO chance now.

"Stay."

"What did you say darling?" He obviously either hadn't heard me right or just didn't believe I was asking him that.

"Stay. You can't leave me, not now. I-I don't think I can cope yet. I haven't ever been left alone and especially after last night- I just, just can't be alone right now. I need you here, I need your help. Please, Newt, Please. Stay." I didn't know until now that my breathing was speeding up and I was panicking.

"Shhhh, if you need me I'm here. I'm right here," He pulled me into a tight hug and I whimpered a little bit so he apologized and I told him not to be silly, it wasn't his fault. "I think I should go get Alby, so we can tell him I won't be going- I'm sure he will understand." I nodded in response to Newt and he then went to go get Alby like he said he would whilst I just sat on Newt's hammock.

I didn't even feel like talking to anyone right now, all I knew was that I needed Newt here with me. I didn't have to tell him what it was about and I knew that because Newt never forced me to tell him- but he would still want to know what affected me so much. My mind briefly flashed the image again (it was like the afterglow of my mothers face from my first nightmare- haunting) and I just felt so numb. I didn't want to cry again, that's weak. I just sat staring at the floor with the scene playing over and over until I felt a hand on my shoulder and snapped out of it; I almost leaped out of my own skin.

Once I noticed it was Newt who had touched me and Alby was now with us I apologized to them both about that and then slumped back down to where I was originally. "No there's no need to apologize." Newt cooed into my ear as he gave Alby some sort of look, to which Alby responded with a low-spirited nod. 

Alby then crouched down opposite my face and told me, "Newt's gonna stay with you today, okay? I understand. I'm not mad. Me and Minho are gonna be just fine in there okay- and we are coming back! I won't say anything to Minho about it okay, just that Newt wasn't feeling so good or something made up, is that alright?" I gently nodded in agreement as I didn't want Minho to think I couldn't fend for myself.

--time skip to when the walls opened--

The mechanical cranking of the Glade walls opening had started and Minho and Alby were getting ready to leave. "Still sure you are too sick to go on an adventure, shank?" Minho smirked as he poked fun at Newt.

"Yeah I would just be slowing you down if I went with you today, but have fun mate! Well- as much fun as you can in a serious situation."

Alby then came and gently planted a kiss on my forehead and whispered, "I'm coming back to you y/n, love you sister," then he switched up his tone to his more 'serious' one, "Right come on then Greenie, let's get going! See you, Newt." Newt nodded and then the two boys went running into the walls with their water.

God I hope he was telling the truth about coming back to me. I wonder what they will find...

Newt gripped onto my hand and led me toward the kitchen, "Come on, you should eat something."