Jegulus - I'll be good

Part Thirty-Three

Freshly finished, immediately to Wattpad. Another more boring chapter, but I find these little conversations important. 
Thank you for your positive feedback on the last one!

Listen to "Wild love" by BANNERS at the beginning to have a good musically company (This song helped me visualise Jegulus at the very moment of their kiss :p )

・‥...━━━━━━━☆☆━━━━━━━...‥・

James didn't expect it to happen, not now at least. But suddenly Regulus' face was close to his own and the next thing he recognised were his lips touching his own. It took him a brief moment to process the information that a boy was kissing him and how weird this knowledge felt. But it didn't take more than a few seconds for him to come along with this and he started recognising other things of this. The lips of the younger one were soft, but had an uneven surface, rough and smooth and James had observed him enough to know that it came from Regulus' habit to bite his lower lip when he was nervous or in thoughts. Which seemed to be the case almost 24/7.
Nevertheless it didn't take away anything from the whole experience. The blood rushing in his ears, the excited and little nervous flattering in his stomach, the warmth coming from Regulus and he could swear to also hear his racing heartbeat.
Truly a moment he wished would never stop, rather wanted to extend. Unfortunately the Slytherin had different plans and pulled away after way too less time. Prongs had to admit that Regulus looked even more adorable now – his face red like crimson, his eyes more lively than he had ever seen him before, but under his layer of shyness seeming to be absolutely determined of what he wanted.
"That's a better expression than words could do the job", Regulus found his voice first again, his lips curled up into a subtle smile, before he started to gather his things. James watched him quietly first, trying to remember what the topic had been, but all he could think of was the kiss and he wasn't even mad about it.
"I don't know what the question was anymore", he pointed out with a laugh, "but yes, it might answer everything much better than words could." His eyes kept following the younger's movement, until the Slytherin stopped and looked down to him: "I have to go now. Don't forget that you gave me your word to stay quiet about it for now."
"Regulus Black, you're the most unromantic person I know...how can you go from an absolutely great moment to being so factual within a minute?", James couldn't help but to laugh and rubbed his eyes. He didn't really expect anything else, if he was honest. All of this was so new for Regulus, even more than for himself, so he couldn't blame him.
"It's just important", Reg replied without moving a muscle, still staring down at him like he tried to look through him.
"My lips are sealed, nobody wrong will hear about it. I might have to tell Remus, he was the first one I told about all of this", he said cautiously and leaned on his elbows. Reggie's face paled and his frown became more visible. James already expected a tantrum coming and tried quickly rehearsed some things he could say, but to his surprise Regulus only nodded slowly.
"That's...okay, I guess. Just make sure he doesn't tell Sirius already."
He stepped over James stretched out legs and opened the door, causing James to fully sit up: "Don't I even get a goodbye kiss?"
Regulus rolled his eyes with a small smirk on his lips: "See you at the meeting. Don't come too late." And with that he left the room. James dropped on the ground again and stared at the ceiling, his mind circling around the past hour and having trouble to process that this was real.

"I don't understand why I can't join your meeting", Padfoot complained and dropped on the sofa next to Moony, casually throwing his head into his lap and firmly ignoring the pile of papers he threw off with that action.
"Sirius! Can you not?", Remus grumbled and leaned down to collect his homework, which only lead to Sirius taking the chance to press a kiss against his lips followed by an innocent smile. It was clearly visible how that melted the frustration like snow in the sun. James couldn't help but to smile about their interactions. Sometimes they were close to strangle each other, but most of the time they were a good example of harmony and trust.
"I would trade with you without hesitation if that would be possible. That's far from what I'm interested to do", Remus finally answered his question with a sigh. He was even less motivated than James was. Moony didn't show up at most house parties either and actually enjoyed the few hours of complete silence when the dormitory was empty.
"Well, I could turn into you and go instead of you. We surely have some polyjuice potion left", Sirius grinned from Remus to James and back.
"Because nobody would notice if Remus acts like a total dork all of a sudden", James said amused and caught the pillow his brother threw at him for that and used it to put it behind his back. So much more comfortable.
"That's so rude. Where did your manners go?", Sirius demanded to know and wrapped his arms around Remus' waist, "tell him that he's mean."
All three bursted into laughter until Peter appeared in the room: "What's so funny?" His face was kind of red from the cold outside, his hair was a mess, but he seemed satisfied.
"Just the usual. Did you meet your secret girlfriend?", Sirius asked grinning and sat up, but still leaning against Remus.
Peter's face darkened even more: "She....she's not a secret! And yes, I did. And now I have to write my history essay, does anyone have more notes? I lost the thread during class a few times.."
Remus nodded: "My notes are on my bed, help yourself."
Peter mumbled a Thank you and walked to the stairs. James eyes followed him with a frown. He was really happy for his friend, but he couldn't shake off the feeling that something wasn't quite right recently. On the other hand, this was a difficult time for everyone and it was too easy to read into things that weren't there. And from there his train of thoughts took speed unstoppable. Being in a war was already hard, losing people was harder and the knowledge that Regulus was in the hands of the enemies was also hard. All of a sudden he felt guilty and selfish for getting him into the situation they were in now. Admiration and feelings for each other, great and good, but they banned Sirius for less and Regulus was so deep in their swamp, he didn't want to even imagine what it meant when his parents found out. How much safety and protection could he provide? Would the aurors try to put him into Azkaban or would they believe and help him? Would it be very bad of him to pull back from the whole thing? Perhaps yes. And he also didn't want that at all. Argh. Why did he have to overthink this now instead of just being happy about how blessed he was? It could've turned out way more difficult.
"Hey, everything okay?", Remus' voice brought him back to present and James blinked confused. Sirius was gone and his friend had moved to the edge of the sofa to be closer to him, so he didn't have to raise his voice.
"Uhm...yes, I was in thoughts", Prongs got out after a moment to catch himself, but still was confused. How did he not notice that Sirius disappeared? Usually that happened with lots of noticeable company.
"I thought so. You stared at the wall for twenty minutes. What have you been thinking about, if you don't mind telling me?", Moony asked calmly, so James walked over to the sofa and started to talk. Told him about his conversation with Lily, about their conversation with Regulus, what happened afterwards and his worries. Remus was a good listener and didn't interrupt him even once. Instead he gave James another bunch of minutes to collect himself after speaking that all out, before he opened his own mouth.
"Okay, first I'm very happy for you that Lily and Regulus are both cooperative and willed to take part in this, I have to say I'm especially surprised about Regulus' agreement", Remus admitted with a smile, since it was absolutely far from being traditional. But it definitely was a good thing that he broke out of this limited life of his.
"And I have to admit that your worries have their raison d'être. Orion and Walburga placed everything on Regulus' shoulders and they won't be happy when it comes out. But James, don't you think his life is dangerous either way? In all honesty, I think you're making it safer for him. He has someone to turn to and to help him carry this weight if necessary. He's not alone anymore and having people standing behind him and actually caring for him as a person and not just for what perks he could bring them...I think that will help him much more than not having you", the Lupin shared his thoughts and relating to his tone it sounded a lot like he was talking about his own feelings back then. And the situation wasn't that different, was it? Both of them were alone and suffering, but finding the right people helped.
"You really always find the right words", James sighed and pulled him into a brotherly hug, "you're a really good friend, Moony."
Remus patted his back: "The perks of being the mom friend. Whatever that means, Marlene called me that."
James grinned and released his friend, before sinking a bit more into the soft cushion of the sofa. A little moment of rest, before heading to the graduation meeting didn't do any harm.