The Broken Soldier

Chapter 10

"Nursing courses?" Sam questioned as he placed your laptop in front of him and everyone huddled around your screen.

*****

"How come you're searching nursing courses, darl?" Loki questions, you watch Bucky tense and glare at the raven haired god.

"It's just another thing that could be proven helpful around here," you shrug your shoulders closing the laptop and notebook.

"Anyway, enough about my spare time, Bucky?" Bucky looks up to you and you give him a soft smile, "Don't be late, you have 15 minuets to do what you want, then you are mine for an hour." You strut to your office with Loki trailing behind you.

"So you finally got the job you wanted?" Loki smiled as you unlocked your door.

"Yes and I couldn't be happier," You sit at your desk, re-reading all your notes from past sessions and any questions you need to ask.

"I'm proud of you Y/N, you've come a long way," Loki wraps his arms around your shoulders, a simple gesture that made you forget everything.

"And that is why I am not going to let anything ruin it," You smiled and Loki sighed.

"Y/N, I know how much work means to you, to feel like a normal person," He pauses and your furrow your brows, unsure where this is leading to, he continues, "I want you to be happy, maybe you should relax a bit more when you are around the team. Instead of burying yourself in work or 'research'."

"I am not here to gain personal relationships Loki. I will be polite and talk, but I am here to help them not be their friends and slack off. If I was working at my own business, I would not befriend my clients. It's simple," you explain looking back at your papers.

"What about Romanoff and I?" Loki pulls your chair around so you are facing him. "What are we?" He asks, his crystal blue eyes searching yours.

"That's different. You were not my clients when we met. I did not have to have a professional relationship with you and I can't let my feelings get in the way of doing my job." You end the conversation and Loki moves away from you.

"I just think you should stop being so 'professional' around them, you live with them for god sake. Yes you joke around with them and you have had fun with them once or twice but do they know anything about you?"

"You know nothing Loki. You left Earth months ago without any contact, I felt alone so I had no choice but to focus on work because I got attached to you and I hated not having you around." You stand up so he is backed up against a wall, "A god damn building fell on me Loki and where were you? You are the reason I refuse to open up to people anymore because you left me and what's worse is that you never said goodbye!" tears pooled in your eyes. A loud knock interrupted your conversation.

"Leave Loki," You muttered and you turned away blinking the tears away.

Loki leaves your office and Bucky walks in. You plaster on a smile and you sit down opposite the solider. You take the notepad in your lap, "How are you today, Buck?" you asked but he averted your gaze. "Bucky?" You tried again and he buried his head in his hands.

"I'm sorry," you heard him whisper.

"What are you sorry for Bucky?" you ask like you was clueless to the meaning behind his apology.

"For hurting you last night. I don't know what got into me, I haven't had a-" he pauses thinking of what to say but you fill in for him.
"Nightmare?" He nods.

"Do you want to talk about it?" you say in a soft voice, hoping to get some information out of him. His leg starts to bounce up and down and you note his behaviour as well as the nervous nail biting.
"It's ok if you don't want to talk about the nightmare, we can talk about something else."