To be in utter bliss and complete contentment was not something either June nor Sirius were used to but after their Christmas break together frolicking about the castle, finding weird and wonderful new hiding places and sharing Christmas lunch was the smaller students that remained with them, Sirius began to see things in a different picture.
With a childhood so damaged and unloved, he could never envision children, let alone marriage all together. Having parents where even a remotely polite glance towards each other was the only affection they could muster, he visions of marriage were bleak and frightfully dark. He was gifted with June, a reminder he would thank Merlin for each night in bed before the night took over but he couldn't, no matter how hard he tried over the months, imagine himself married... Until the last month of school came by.
It was filled with overwhelming and slightly overbearing emotions from others around him; James and Lily so deep in love and talking about their futures, Remus preparing and discussing tasks with the headmaster since the Order began (another overwhelming event!) Peter becoming more twitchy and cold towards them all and the remaining girls were emotional shrews half the time. June, naturally, was the only person to keep him sane and focused.
They spend the early summer evening on a tiny row boat across the lake, a spontaneous mini adventure Sirius dragged her into. As they laid in the boat, floating across the soft water and gazing at the stars, June glanced towards Sirius to discover a perplexed frown, soft still but his brows were tense.
"The stars not to your liking tonight? You never look this grumpy..." She turned as gently as possible to avoid rocking the boat and pulling them under to the merpeople.
His breath was shallow and thoughts swelling so tight around his brain, he was ready to burst. "Juni, I never once in my life ever wanted to be married. Not at all." The air was suddenly sharp on his skin as her finger tips pulled away, tucking them under her armpits for warmth. He turned his head this time to match her glance, her face was unreadable.
"To tell the truth, I've never sat down to think about marriage either ... all I thought about was James proposing to Lily. Never myself in that situation..." Her unsure tone matched his - together this was the most awkward conversation yet.
"But I've changed my mind. You've changed my mind..." His finally turned also, a little more rough as the boat shook. They grabbed each other to even the weight, their light and breathy giggles rippled across the water. "I'm handful to most, sometimes even you but you are honestly, above James, the only person who can see every part of me... I don't understand it and it scares me but I can't be anyone else around you." He pulled her to his chest and hummed.
June was flattered and giddy at the prospect of his unofficial proposal but like him, she was trying to deal with all the other overbearing feelings around them that the idea of marriage was terrifying.
"Sirius, I don't know if that's something I'm ready for just yet.." She blurred out, her chest feeling heavy, all sudden breath pulled away from her - it felt like her anxiety could swallow her whole.
Biting his lip, he nodded at her response, feeling the heaviness hitting him this time. Their eyes met again, the crescent moon glow reflecting across the rippled water and twinkling with the stars. "Well, no matter if we're married or not, I'm not going to need anyone else in my life to satisfy my heart. You've done that from the start and will always continue you too." The lump formed in his throat - he finally let his emotions overwhelm him and pour out of the overflowing bucket. Wiping an unknown tear, June grinned and hugged him tight, sweet whispers of I loves you's exchanged and continued their relaxed evening rowing back to the castle
Tomorrow was their final day at Hogwarts.
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FanfictionHighest Rank: - #1 PotterSister Juniper was a shining example of all the best attributes a woman could have which is why Sirius was so drawn to her and it wasn't because her brother was his best friend! As Sirius joined the Potter family, he woke up...