Infatuated (hsau)

chapter 43.

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That summer seemed to last forever
And if I had the choice
Yeah, I'd always wanna be there
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Harlow Dean

I find it ironic how Harry told me I wasn't allowed to work today and now he's taking me with him to shout at some of the gang members in training who keep pissing off their boss.

We did spend a good few hours doing virtually nothing though. He asked me to teach him how to play piano but it turns out that Harry actually knows how to play. I expected to have to start from the beginning and go through the twinkle twinkle little star first but he's not as bad as I thought he'd be.

He was able to play snippets of 'clocks' by Coldplay which I was actually really impressed by. Unfortunately he couldn't get a hang of the whole song but I was just amazed he could play the first five seconds of the song.

Apparently when he taught himself how to play piano when he was in care, he used to watch tutorials online but ended up getting the hand of the guitar quicker so decided to stick with that instead. He has his own piano at his house now too, which is why he asked me to teach him.

The difficult thing is that I learned to play by reading sheet music and Harry learned by watching tutorials which means I'm not the best teacher. I kept pointing to the page in front of us whilst telling him to 'just play it like it is', so I'm very grateful for the patience he had.

It was a nice little bonding experience, it gave us something to share interest in.

I wasn't sure how things were gonna go after last night, I wasn't sure if he was just gonna take what he wanted and then leave, but he didn't. I'm glad he didn't.

When I woke up he was already awake and brushing the hair out of my face, the exact opposite of how I expected to be woken up. Not once would I have guessed that the guy who runs a gang for a living would be all soft on the inside.

For the first time in what feels like forever, I woke up without that feeling of anxiety crushing me and instead, with the presence of somebody who made me feel at ease. It's actually slightly terrifying how something I thought would be horrible, ended up being the complete opposite.

"Birdy?" Harry says, snapping his fingers in front of my face which nearly gave me a heart attack.

What is it with him and scaring me shitless?

"What?"

"Went away with the fairies for a second there," He chuckles, bringing both his hands back to the wheel.

He did not just use that expression, cute.

Oh god. This is not good at all.

'Reason #352 nothings ever as bad as it seems."

That was today's journal entry, today's reason.

I thought sharing myself with somebody in the way I did last night was going to be horrifying, I thought I'd neve great through it without a breakdown, but I did. I really have been overthinking the whole intimacy thing. Don't get me wrong, there's still a whole list of intimate things I'm still uneasy about, however having sex isn't one of them.

That's down to Harry though.

For once I didn't feel like I was being used as something for the guy to get off with, it felt like Harry cared.

"Just warning you now that these guys will definitely stare at you but don't act intimidated by them or you'll boost their egos and they'll start showing off for you." Harry tells me as he pulls into what looks like an old scrap yard or warehouse.