Our Dependence

Chapter Three: Fragments

Friendships can always be taken for granted.  That was something I learned as I watched everyone continue their lives, getting harder and harder to reach. You never realize what you have until it's gone. That's how I thought they would feel once they realized that I was no longer a part of their life.

How foolish of me.

It wasn't that I didn't take my friendships seriously; it's quite the opposite. My friends didn't take our friendship seriously. Should I call it 'friendship'? It feels like a relationship of convenience. I was conveniently in the right place at the right time.

When they no longer needed me, I was disposed of.

It's no wonder making friends or opening up to someone can be such a difficult task. I'm scared to get hurt, because I'm always hurting. I'm always picking up the pieces. So what do I do when someone unexpected reaches out and shows very little support and finally sees me instead of staring through me?

Am I supposed to let them in while fearing that they would leave like everyone else? The dripping in my mind gets louder and louder, whispering fears that I refuse to speak out about. What if I am nothing but a convenience to them?

Will my already fragmented heart be cared for again? Or is that wishful thinking?

Chapter Three: Fragments

Dropping her bag on the floor before she fell against the comforting warmth of the bed, Hinata sighed and took in a deep breath. The air smelt fresh, different from Konoha — her home. A few weeks' travel was suddenly worth it as she looked around the apartment. It wasn't anything great, just a temporary home with the things she needed to survive. She couldn't complain really, as long as she was away from that horrid odour, then she'd be okay.

Combing through her hair absentmindedly, she unpacked her bags and put away the things she brought along. Making note to go out and buy some other things [kitchen utensils and more clothes], with plans to also explore the village a little bit more, Hinata grabbed her towel and her sanitary supplies — she wanted a hot shower for a change.

Sitting in the tub as hot water relaxed her muscles, she unwrapped the bloodied bandages and threw them in the wastebasket. Studying her work carefully, making sure there was no infections in sight [she forgot to clean the jagged weapon before she used it], she used her washcloth to clean around the cuts that were too big.

Throwing the stained cloth into the sink, she got out of the bath and dried herself. Looking at her reflection in the mirror, Hinata hummed to herself seeing how frail she looked. Although her curves were still very much visible, it was hard to ignore the way her bones protrude when she shifted in certain ways. It was very obvious when it came to her hips that she'd lost a considerable amount of weight.

Going back into her bedroom, she decided an oversized shirt over some shorts would be enough. No one lived with her, so keeping her bandaged arm hidden wasn't an absolute need — not like it would be questioned [she was a ninja after all].

Filling the kitchen cupboards with ramen packs, and the fridge with fruits, vegetables and whatever meats she had caught — and bought — during their travels, Hinata decided that soup would be enough for her today.

Taking out her small pot and filling it with water while she chopped some vegetables and seasoned some beef, she worked quietly and efficiently. As she mixed the broth and covered the pot to let it cook, she couldn't ignore his presence any longer.