STAR WARS IMAGINES

obi-wan kenobi | words fail

1000 words

/ / /

You let your hands trail over the railing of the balcony as you gazed out onto the city below. The sky was a beautiful magenta, highlighted with strokes of indigo as the nightfall crept in. The night was teetering towards being bitterly cold, but it was much preferable to the stuffiness inside.

You tried to breathe, but you were currently suffocating. The amount of anxiety in you was killing you. You were terrified.

"There you are. You aren't meditating, are you?"

You turned quickly. All of the anxiety bubbling up inside of you spilled over as you saw him. "Obi---"

"It's all right," he said, voice hushed. "They didn't mention it. We're fine."

Finally, you could breathe. You inhaled the cold air and leaned against the balcony, shaking your head slowly. The last twelve hours of your life have been a nightmare. There was no proof that yours and Obi Wan's relationship had been revealed to the Jedi Council, but the anxiety of that happening was always there. And when Obi-Wan was whisked away to a council meeting without any warning and no ability to know why he was being called in... that made your heart stop.

As you turned to look back on the busy city, he approached the balcony. Leaning against it, he watched you carefully. You gnawed nervously on your lip, tears in your eyes.

"___," he chuckled, "there's no need to let it trouble you. We're alright."

You slowly shook your head. Alright? No, you weren't alright. "What are we doing, Obi?"

"What do you mean?"

"What are we doing?" you hissed. "We are jeopardizing everything by being together."

"Yes," he said. "We are."

It angered you. It angered you just how badly he was willing to throw it all away for you. That anger alone was enough to threaten your life as a Jedi, but throw in your undying, unwavering love for the man you'd grown to know over the years, and you were in hot water.

"And you're alright with that? With possibly losing everything because of me?" You huffed. "You're a Jedi Master. I'm a padawan. If Master Windu knew... he would hate me. And what kind of role model are you being to Anakin by knowingly disobeying the Jedi Order?"

"We both know that my appearance to obey the Order's rules on attachments in no way affects Anakin. He decided on his own to pursue the Senator, with no council from me on the matter."

"I suppose that's true," you said. Although Obi never called him out on it, the two of you were aware of Padme and Anakin's blatantly obvious feelings for each other. While you weren't sure how progressed their relationship was, you knew they had eyes on one another for many months now.

"Also, I wouldn't be losing anything, if I got to keep you. I would rather lose my place on the council and leave the Jedi Order than be without you." His smile was so genuine. It made your heart hurt. He shifted closer to you and covered your hand with his. Touches were few and far between in public, and each and every one made your heart flutter in your chest. "So long as you feel the same, I am content with my decisions."

You couldn't help but smile at him. "Of course I feel the same way."

"Besides, it's not like we're Anakin and Padme. Parading around these towers pretending that we're not seeing them hugging and kissing in the corners or stare at one another across the room."

You laughed. "We're almost as bad as they are."

"Yes," he said, "we are. But we hide it twice as well."

The night had fallen completely over the bright city of Coruscant. You watched the people below go about their evening. Seeing couples down below, walking hand in hand, made you want to be able to be open with what you had with Obi. You loved having the privacy of only the two of you in your own little universe. But there was so much stress involved in the relationship that you feared you would never know a kiss where you could allow yourself to become completely oblivious to everything except for him. You were always glancing over his shoulder, over yours, letting your fear get the best of you.

Master Yoda always said that attachment was forbidden to a Jedi because it posed a threat to their training. Attachment would lead to fear. But your only fear rested in the fact that having an attachment was forbidden, and therefore the Jedi wished you would be left alone. Your fear was in the fear of being torn from Obi completely one day.

"We won't be able to hide it forever. There will come a day when they'll know. Either they'll catch us together or we'll finally have to break down and tell them."

"I'm not afraid of that day," he said. "When it comes, I will go with you. Anywhere."

You looked at him and you were full of so much love. His hand closed over yours, holding on tightly as you agreed. "Anywhere."

"Stars, I love you," he said. He lifted your hand off the railing and kissed your knuckles softly. His eyes twinkled in the moonlight. He kept your hand in both of his, bringing it to his chest. "I have since the moment I first laid eyes on you."

Words failed you. Every time he professed his love to you, the words failed you. Wanting to show him how much he meant to you in return, you reached up on your tiptoes and pressed a warm, gentle kiss on his lips.

For the first time, as you kissed him, you did not worry about unwanted eyes on the two of you. For the first time, you almost welcomed them, knowing that the moment your relationship was discovered, you would be given the opportunity to run. You could make a home with Obi. Finally think of marriage... possibly of having children... and the pressure of politics and the strictness of the Jedi Order would be far, far behind you.

Let them see, you decided. Let them know.